As an Older Woman Dating a Younger Man, the 'Cougar' Stereotype Is Harmful and Needs to Go

[Anonymous]

I'm a 40-year-old woman dating a 27-year-old man, and we've been together for 8 months. Our relationship is incredibly meaningful to me. We have a strong, supportive connection where we both feel heard and understood. We enjoy spending time together, making long-term plans, and offering each other emotional support through life’s challenges. It’s a healthy, loving relationship where we both invest deeply in each other’s happiness and growth.

However, ever since I started dating him, I've been called a 'cougar' quite a lot. I've come to think of it as an incredibly awful term that perpetuates a lot of problematic (and false) stereotypes about older women who date younger men.

To start out, the term 'cougar' implies that women dating younger men (like me) were aggressively pursuing getting a younger man. It makes us sound like we're either having some midlife crisis (at best) or that we're downright predatory (at worse). It also makes us sound like we're pursing younger men out of desperation

When it comes to my relationship, neither of those things are true. In fact, I was not the pursuer at all. He was the one that pursued me, and he actually had to do quite a bit of convincing for me to give him a real chance because I was so concerned about him being so much younger.

Additionally, I hate the implication of possible predatory behavior. There is a big age gap, but we're still in an equal consensual relationship. I really hate this false idea that the woman being quite a bit older changes that.

Also, people often assume that our relationship isn't serious. They assume that we're only interested in having a fling or primarily physical relationship that isn't serious. While we do have a great physical relationship that doesn't mean that there isn't a lot of love and commitment there too beyond just the physical (because there is). People who assume otherwise because of our age gap are undermining and overlooking the emotional investment and commitment we have in each other. This becomes particularly relevant when family and friends are constantly belittling your relationship over this assumption

The term 'cougar' often reduces women dating younger men to one-dimensional sexual figure, assuming that my relationship with a younger man is only about seeking validation or proving my attractiveness. The implies that women with younger men are desperate or insecure, trying to reclaim our youth. In reality, our desire for our younger partners is genuine, not rooted in some insecure need to have a younger guy boost our ego. Society often expects older women to be less intimate as they age, but those of us who are secure (including those of us dating younger men) know our intimacy doesn’t fade with age, and we shouldn’t have to hide or justify it. We also shouldn't have people assume that the only reason why we're dating a younger guy is because we're desperately insecure in that area (because it's not true)

Being called a 'cougar' often brings a lot of judgement and unwanted attention from others. I feel incredibly frustrated having to constantly defend my very healthy and very loving relationship. eople—friends, family, even strangers—assume things about us based on age alone, often questioning the legitimacy of our bond or reducing it to something casual or shallow. The label 'cougar' insinuates that our relationship is weird/odd. It emphasizes that people are way more focused on our age gap (and the fact that I, the woman, am the older one in that age gap) as opposed to the love and commitment we share. I’ve had to explain myself so many times, constantly justifying why I’m with someone younger, when in reality, our relationship is built on genuine emotional connection and mutual respect. It’s exhausting to deal with the judgment

Also, it's pretty sexist. Because women who date younger men (especially much younger men) are breaking the social norm that men date younger women (and women date older men) there's often a lot more judgement (there's no term for men who date a woman 13 years younger, for example). Because of that there's a lot more social judgement and gossip around our relationship than there would be if the genders were reversed. A man my age dating a woman 13 years younger wouldn't have to constantly defend his relationship the way I do, and it's exhausting. It's also a major reason why there's a unique term for women dating men quite a bit younger ('cougar'), but no such term for men dating women quite a bit younger.

So I really hate the term 'cougar', and I wish it would just disappear from being used in regards to describing older women dating younger men.

[TheRealPepperPotts]

Sounds like your family/friends/acquaintances need a definition review:

A cougar is a female, such as a high school teacher, doctor or even female college professor, who pursues a relationship with a minor or other male in an inferior power position, such as male students or patients. She ignores ethical and professional conventions and takes advantage of a safe environment to get close to targets she would not otherwise have access to. It's predatory and takes advantage of a power position.

Two consenting adults in a relationship, especially when the younger one is nearly thirty, is not taking advantage of a power position or naivety, unless there is a factor that qualifies it as such (a special needs case, for example).

I think when there are labels being tossed around, the best thing we can do is make sure we clarify what is meant by those labels as specifically as possible. Your friends and family are basically calling you a predator, and that is offensive. It's time to have a talk, and set some boundaries. If someone called a 40-year-old man a pedophile for dating a 27-year-old woman, he wouldn't put up with it and neither should you. Just tell them to never make that reference again. Don't allow it, and if they do it, pack up and leave. They can call you a cougar behind your back, and you can remove yourself from interacting with them.

It's kind of like the term "Karen". It's a term that describes a white, entitled, middle-class/upper middle class woman between roughly 35 and 55. She's the woman who makes a scene over getting a mocha at Starbucks, even though she actually ordered a mocha. She's the woman who asks for the manager when the cashier won't run her expired coupons. She is the woman who expects exceptions to be made for her, probably because she had pretty privilege when she was younger.

But now, the term "Karen" is use on any woman who disagrees with someone else, even if she has a legitimate point. It's used on women who call the manager when a cashier overcharges them and won't correct it. It's gone from being used to rightfully shame entitled bullies to being used to shut up all women. That's a misuse of the term.

So, "cougar" is still a legitimate term, but they are using it in the wrong context.

[myTake Owner]

AMEN SISTER!

[TheRealPepperPotts]

Anytime. :D

[PainForPleaser]

If they love each other they will work it out

[ohsheeT]

Yeah it doesn't really matter what people think or say because they don't know you they don't know him they don't know your intentions so of course there's always going to be those unhappy people in life who have to put their two cents worth in because they are so unhappy you just have to let it go because it's always going to be there and there's always going to be a jackass it has to get in your business for whatever reasons and that's when you just smile and say okay thank you and just keep walking

There's people in this world that are ugly that love drama and they might not even know you but they're going to Snicker they're going to point they're going to say whatever and you just have to look at them and know in your heart and in your mind they don't know you so who gives a f*** what they think it's none of their business anyway let them just keep thinking whatever it is they're thinking nothing just keep being unhappy and miserable and you just put a smile on your face and keep going forward

[myTake Owner]

I obviously don't let their opinions affect what I think of my relationship with him. I completely agree that they're ignorant I should let it go in one ear and out the other.

However, when you get a lot of blowback from society over your relationship it can get really frustrating (even if you know they're wrong). That's particularly true when it comes from family and friends who you want to be supportive and understanding.

My post here was a lot about ranting out that frustration. It didn't have anything to do with me not being confident about my relationship

[ohsheeT]

Yes that makes a lot of since. and I hear what your saying.. . It's like you can't make anybody love you they have to do it on their own

Same with your parents and Friends you can't make them do anything they have to want to do it alone maybe in time they might who knows . But it's like anything else from work if there's a blockage or a roadblock on things you either have to go around them or through them and keep living your life is their choice to be a friend to be kind to be understanding it's not your choice you already know what your choice would be so yeah I hear you... When I was 16 and a half got his babysitting for a lady and when she got home the lady that she was with gave me a ride home except for my stuff by her house first she was 47 and we saw each other for probably about a year but I didn't tell anybody anyway. I didn't think it was that big of a deal until she told me she was going back to her husband I didn't know she was married LOL or separatedl

[Finchie40]

There will always be judgmental people in this world that try to rub their 2 cents together , just ignore them and live your life the way you want to , if he treats you good that’s all that matters , fuck what other people think or say , I don’t hold age as a deciding factor when I meet a beautiful girl that catches my interest , that I have great chemistry and and connection with , I dated younger and older girls’ and I always heard judgmental assholes, that didn’t know shit about what they were talking about when it came down to her and I’d relationship , they just sounded like jealous insecure idiots to me, that wish they had what I had. So the best thing for you to do is just ignore them and don’t let it get to you , they mean nothing

[myTake Owner]

I obviously don't let their opinions affect what I think of my relationship with him. I completely agree that they're ignorant I should let it go in one ear and out the other.

However, when you get a lot of blowback from society over your relationship it can get really frustrating (even if you know they're wrong). That's particularly true when it comes from family and friends who you want to be supportive and understanding.

My post here was a lot about ranting out that frustration. It didn't have anything to do with me not being confident about my relationship

[Finchie40]

I understand , I was just giving you some advice on what to do , considering I have been in your shoes as well , and know the nonsense that occurs from other people trying to rain on your parade and what I did about it , that’s all. I know it can be annoying and frustrating trust me , but again they mean nothing , all that matters is you and your partner are happy together and choose each other , Fuck what other people think or say

[HawkPerception]

I believe love doesn't discriminate by age. But I do hope you have already talked about kids and he either can't have kids or doesn't want them.

Also, stop feeling attacked. Cougar is not an offensive term. Don't be a part of that cult. The fact is you ARE older than him, and people will judge you both regardless what you feel for each other. Stop trying to be one of those "woke" cancel culture women trying to control what other people say. Get on with your life.

[myTake Owner]

We have talked about kids. For what it's worth, I still ovulate regularly/haven't gone through menopause. I also would actually love to have a couple more kids (the only reason why I didn't before is because my ex didn't want more)

I get that it's more difficult for women at my age to get pregnant, but it's still very possible. I'm in great shape, he's in great shape, we have no problem making lots of love (haha). If I weren't on birth control now maybe I would be pregnant.

But if and when we get to the point where we get engaged we've decided that I'm going to get off the birth control and we're going to try to have kids.

And if I just can't get pregnant he's said he's completely OK with adopting too.

[Avicenna]

Over the years, we’ve heard this identical story from anonymous posters. Although I think you’re making it all up, I would tell someone in that situation not to worry about what haters think.

[Anonymous]

It is more "ok" when a significantly older woman dates a much younger man compared to significantly older men dating much younger women.

Younger women are extremely fetishized in our society. Young men aren't.

There are plenty of old creeps, as old as 45, who claim they only date women 18 to 25 or only "under 30". Old creeps don't desire women that age due to emotional connection or romance, its just the hot bodies that they want. These are very shallow old men who just want some dick fun. Physical connection over an emotional connection.

Young women need to be warned. 8/9 out of 10 times when a significantly older man wants to date a much younger women, its the looks that he is seeking, not emotional connection.

[myTake Owner]

Well, what you're talking about is 45 year old men trying to date women in their late teens or early twenties. I actually agree that they should get pushback (and if a woman that age was trying to date a man in his late teens/early 20s I'd agree she should get pushback too)

I know some people are going to say 'you're a hypocrite' but I'm really not. There's a big differnce between dating a younger guy (or girl) whose already pretty established, has a decent amount of life experience, is pretty mature etc. as opposed to one that is still very young immature, inexperienced, and not well established.

If a 40 (or even 50) year old man was dating a woman in her late (maybe even mid) 20s I don't think that's a problem. But if he's dating a woman in her late teens or early 20s I think that is a huge problem

[Opinion Owner]

There is a huge reason why vast majority of people tend to marry someone around their own age. Because people of similar maturity, life stages, similar levels of life experience tend to get along better. There are exceptions.

But for most of the time, the typical 40 yr old would usually have absolutely nothing in common with the average 25 yr old.

But overall, young women tend to be predatarized way too much by older men in our society. Just because a much older man is chasing you, it doesn't mean he is in love with you. He may be wanting you for totally the wrong reasons.

[Curmudgeon]

If I were you I would take it as a term of endearment. Because all too often, it really IS.

You look after your "cub" and have his best interests in mind, and you love him, yes?

And even if it is a situation where he is a frustrated "InCel" young man and the lady in question is a hurt divorcee "getting her groove back", well, that's a win-win still, isn't it?

[myTake Owner]

Even if people aren't necessarily intending it to be an insult, a lot of those implications are still baked into the term.

I mean, what does a cougar do? It hunts for its 'prey'. That implies that older women with younger men are agressively hunting younger men because either they're desperate, having a midlife crisis, are being preditory, aren't serious about a real relationship (at least not with the younger guy), or at least are delusional about a real relationship with the younger guy

And even then a lot of the times the older woman isn't the aggressor. In my case the younger man I'm with actively pursued me, and I was iniitally hesitant because of the age gap.

[Curmudgeon]

Ok, colloquially, looking for a dating and mating partner is often called "the hunt". By both genders. Because in a way, it IS a hunt.

Of course, the goal is not to eat or devour one's "prey" but to bond with them (OK, all you oral sex aficionados, before you chime in, you know what I meant! :D )

"And even then, a lot of the times the older woman isn't the aggressor. In my case the younger man I'm with actively pursued me, and I was initially hesitant because of the age gap."

No disagreement here - in fact, when I come across frustrated and unhappy young "InCel" men, I tell them "GO COUGAR HUNTING!" (Again, I mean "hunting" colloquially). Because their awkwardness and shyness, which is mocked by all too often bitchy young ladies their own age range, is all too often endearing and sweet to the older and all too often divorcee ladies.

Anyway, if you two have found a lifelong love, great. And even if you are rebounding and he is inexperienced, great nonetheless. Still a win-win.

[Curmudgeon]

Oh, and one other important reference, from American History no less!
The "Cougar" phenomenon is not new--Benjamin Franklin ↗

[myTake Owner]

If the younger man is 'hunting' the older woman that still implies that he's just having a fettish and that any relationship that happens isn't real.

[Curmudgeon]

Your mileage may vary. The point is, for young inexperienced men, just getting out there and dating is helpful. And the older women are wiser and less vapid and shallow than the young ladies their age.

[exitseven]

Everyone is different. When I was 22 I dated a girl that was 17 and in high school. I did not know how young she was when we met and I somehow fell really hard for her. People would accuse me of robbing the cradle. It was not like that at all.

[myTake Owner]

I'm not saying it never happens, but it doesn't happen nearly as much. I also don't think there's nearly as much scrutiny as when an older woman is with a younger man.

[Daniela1982]

And if an older man is dating a younger woman he is robbing the cradle or a sugar daddy. Sometimes you just have to deal with it.

[Curmudgeon]

Exactly. The Author's or OP's claim that older men dating substantially younger women do not take any flak from much of society is just WRONG.

[myTake Owner]

I'm not saying it never happens, but it doesn't happen nearly as much. I also don't think there's nearly as much scrutiny as when an older woman is with a younger man.

[HungTexan]

You’re right. An older woman dating a younger man shouldn’t be frowned upon. Nobody says anything about an older man dating a younger woman. I dated an older woman (40+) discretely when I was 18-19. It was awesome, and she taught me so much about sex and how to please a woman.

that stereotype needs to go.

[Anonymous]

The stereotype cuts both ways, but to be honest I think men usually get the short end of the stick. I honestly don't see much negative attention paid to cases where the woman is the older one, but there has always been, and still is, a lot of very negative attention paid to older men who date younger women. Assumptions are made about a man's intentions that are not typically made toward older women. I agree both should go away, but let's make sure we apply that to both sides.

[Opinion Owner]

To be clear, I am not referring to an older person dating an underaged male or female. That's a whole different animal, and it always deserves all the negative judgement it gets, regardless of the sex of the victim.

[myTake Owner]

I think people who make this retort are often thinking about Leonardo Dicaprio men who are in their late 40s and early 50s trying to date women in their late teens and early 20s. That's not an apples to apples comparison to what I'm talking about. There's a big difference between that and someone in their early 40s dating someone else in their late 20s.

If a man in his early 40s was dating a woman in her late 20s he would not be getting nearly the flack that a woman in her early 40s dating a man in his late 20s (like me) would be getting

For instance, why isn't there a male version of 'an older man who dates a younger woman'? I get people will say that it's 'pedophile' or 'robbing the cradle'. However, that's not a 'male version' because those terms can very easily also apply to older women with younger men (believe me, I'm very aware). However, the term 'cougar' is strictly for an older woman-younger man dynamic, and it comes with a ton of (I'd argue negative) connotations. Why don't men have an equivalent to that?

[Filthy_Immigrant]

this post reeks of modern feminist pandering and victimhood culture, you are literally seeking validation for decisions that ignore biological realities and sexual market values. like come on, we all know ollder women who date younger losers are just trying to relive their fleeting youth and circumvent their diminished leverage in the dating marketplace.

PS: 8 months in a relationship is nothing. give it 1.5 years or more and watch how obsolete that honeymoon stage will be

[myTake Owner]

We have talked about kids. For what it's worth, I still ovulate regularly/haven't gone through menopause. I also would actually love to have a couple more kids (the only reason why I didn't before is because my ex didn't want more)

I get that it's more difficult for women at my age to get pregnant, but it's still very possible. I'm in great shape, he's in great shape, we have no problem making lots of love (haha). If I weren't on birth control now maybe I would be pregnant.

But if and when we get to the point where we get engaged we've decided that I'm going to get off the birth control and we're going to try to have kids.

And if I just can't get pregnant he's said he's completely OK with adopting too.

[myTake Owner]

Again, the rest of this really goes along with why I really don't like the term 'cougar'.

Firstly, the idea that the older woman is just desperately trying to pursue the younger man because of a midlife crisis or something similar is often just not true. Again, in my case (and in the case of a lot of older woman-younger man relationships) he was the one who pursued me at first. I was actually super hesitant at first because I thought he was too young. Obviously I came around and changed my mind, but the point is that this idea that I (and women my age dating younger men) was just " date younger losers are just trying to relive their fleeting youth and circumvent their diminished leverage in the dating marketplace." is simply not true

[Filthy_Immigrant]

your passion for defending your situation is appreciative, however feelings and anecdotes don’t override reality. Fertility at your age isn’t just about 'still ovulating'—complications and risks are undeniable. And while he may have pursued you, it’s clear the dynamic of older women dating younger men often stems from mismatched SMV. The honeymoon phase might feel great now, but long-term, the age gap often leads to incompatibility—whether due to biological realities, lifestyle differences, or changing priorities.

If it works for you both, great, but ignoring these realities and painting every critique as invalid isn’t the way to prove your point

[myTake Owner]

I mean, we've already thought through all these things.

Like I said, we've talked about the kids thing and are on the same page about that. And if worse case scenario happens and I can't biologically have kids then he's said he's happy to adopt

I really don't understand what you're refering to exactly when you talk about SMV. Regardless, he did pursue me when he could have pursued any number of girls his age or younger. He also had to spend about a month and a half working really hard to convince me to give him any kind of chance. And, to be frank, he's not lacking any kind of physical or sexual interest in me/our relationship. He's made it very clear he's got a lot of interest in me in that way.

I think you're assuming that because I'm older I have a much lower SMV. Even if you (or others) think that's the case, he certainly doesn't.

Our relationship is still pretty new, and we're not in quite the place where we're going to get engaged. However, we've also had about 8 (almost 9) months of a relationship, and that's a decent amount of time to get to know someone, their lifestyles, their priorities, etc, and whether or not you are likely compatible. As of right now, we feel pretty confident that we are

Again, we're not quite in the place where we're engaged, so we're still figuring things out. However, I still can confidently say that (even though there's a major age gap between us) we're in a pretty strong place relationship wise

[Filthy_Immigrant]

It’s good that you’ve had discussions and feel confident in your relationship. But confidence doesn’t override reality. SMV isn’t about what he feels now—it’s about the broader marketplace dynamics: age, fertility, and future potential. Younger men sometimes pursue older women for short-term validation or novelty, but that doesn’t make it sustainable long-term.

Attraction and effort in the first 8-9 months don’t prove anything about lasting compatibility. The honeymoon phase always feels strong, but real tests come with time, life changes, and when the initial excitement wears off. You might not see it now, but these gaps in age, fertility, and priorities often create cracks later.

If you’re committed to this path, that’s your choice. But don’t dismiss these realities just because things feel good in the moment. Time will reveal whether this foundation can handle the challenges ahead.

[myTake Owner]

You can have huge doubts about any relationship based on that criteria, not just one with an older woman-younger man age dynamic. You can always think 'things will be different after the honeymoon period' in any relationship. You can always think 'we'll eventually grow apart' in any relationship.

And, to be honest, I'm not sure if we're in the honeymoon stage anymore. Yes, we enjoy being around each other and we both are still highly attracted to each other. However, that whole 'head in the clouds' thing just isn't there in the relationship for us at this point. And we've also had our fights/disagreements that we've worked through.

Again, once we started to become more serious we seriously sat down, discussed what we want out of life, and worked to figure out if it was compatible. It was/is. In terms of fertility, my doctor seems to think I'm still pretty fertile. But even if I can't have kids the old fashion way he's said he's open to adopting instead.

And those things can be problems in any relationship, even if there isn't a major age gap. I got divorced from my ex-husband because we were on totally different pages, and he was my age. My relationship with my last boyfriend didn't work out because we were incompatible in terms of goals, and he was about 5 years older than me. In fact, I'm a lot more compatible with my current boyfriend regarding life goals than I was with either of them.

And it's not like I'm not aware that there are risks, but I (and he) are willing to take them. And there are risks in most every relationship, regardless of the age gap.

[Unit1]

Them just jelly, Lady. Or being judgmental. You don't need to listen to them. sometimes older women know how to love compared to a number younger girls.

Me loves girls and women 💕

[PeachyPie93]

Well people will always judge you just like men get called pedos for dating younger women. I will believe this is not just a fling in 2 years but before that its just a fling to everyone looking in since big age gap relationships rarely last..

[myTake Owner]

But do men in their early 40s dating women in their late 20s get called pedos?

You see, people who make this retort are often thinking about Leonardo Dicaprio men who are in their late 40s and early 50s trying to date women in their late teens and early 20s. That's not an apples to apples comparison to what I'm talking about. There's a big difference between that and someone in their early 40s dating someone else in their late 20s.

[PeachyPie93]

Yes I have seen guys get called pedos by the younger generation for a gap like that.. Woman saying they were taken advantage of at 25 by older men, it does happen lol. But if you date younger you will always get called something it doesn't really matter.. If you are in your 30s and date a guy in his 20s you get called a Puma LOL

[myTake Owner]

If it does happen it's far more rare and far less intense.

[Anonymous]

If it's working for you, great, and he's 27 and can make his own decisions.
More generally I don't think it makes the best sense but that doesn't mean it won't work.
The older male thing makes more sense and women complain a lot about that too (the ones missing out probably).
You don't mention whether he wants kids or will want kids, most do want their own family eventually.

[myTake Owner]

I'm not saying men with younger women don't get any rude behavior from society. However, I don't think it's nearly on the level of older women with younger men. I also think they get praised for it a lot more than we do

[myTake Owner]

We have talked about kids. For what it's worth, I still ovulate regularly/haven't gone through menopause. I also would actually love to have a couple more kids (the only reason why I didn't before is because my ex didn't want more)

I get that it's more difficult for women at my age to get pregnant, but it's still very possible. I'm in great shape, he's in great shape, we have no problem making lots of love (haha). If I weren't on birth control now maybe I would be pregnant.

But if and when we get to the point where we get engaged we've decided that I'm going to get off the birth control and we're going to try to have kids.

And if I just can't get pregnant he's said he's completely OK with adopting too.

[Staximus]

Let's be realistic here. Most age gap relationships only last as long as the older person can keep up with the younger person, or until the younger person finds another person they like more that's closer to their age. So if you want to set yourself up for failure 75% of the time, have an age gap relationship.

[TadCurious]

Very thoughtful and sincere myTake. It's well written and presents a compelling point of view that the double standard is unfair and unjustified.

Best wishes for your relationship.

Happy New Year! 🎈

[myTake Owner]

Thank you!

[Anonymous]

What do you care what other people call the relationship if you're so confident about it? Sounds to me like your obsession with trying to control what other people say and think about it is an indication that you're not as confident about it as you portray.

[myTake Owner]

I obviously don't let their opinions affect what I think of my relationship with him. I completely agree that they're ignorant I should let it go in one ear and out the other.

However, when you get a lot of blowback from society over your relationship it can get really frustrating (even if you know they're wrong). That's particularly true when it comes from family and friends who you want to be supportive and understanding.

My post here was a lot about ranting out that frustration. It didn't have anything to do with me not being confident about my relationship

[Opinion Owner]

I can understand needing to vent. But the reality is that there will always be people who don't approve of various things you do or relationships in your life. You can't change the way other people behave so the only way you can ever be happy is to change they way you react to it.

[myTake Owner]

I do get that, but that doesn't mean that their judgement and closed mindedness aren't still incredibly frustrating

[Opinion Owner]

You only get as frustrated as you allow yourself to be. Frustration is under your control not theirs.

[myTake Owner]

To some extent that's true. However, when you've got friends and family that you really want to support your loving and healthy relationship being rude and cynical about it then it does get really frustrating

Rude remarks from people who just find out about your relationship don't help either.

It would be better if they just stopped being judgmental and closed minded.

[genericname85]

so basically there's a stereotype about the thing you're doing and because you don't like that stereotype, cause you're doing that thing, you want the stereotype to go away? got it. it doesn't work like that tho.

[myTake Owner]

Because (like many stereotypes) this stereotype is problematic and wrong

[genericname85]

well i would say like most stereotypes this one is accurate even if it doesn't feel good. you gotta realize that maybe these stereotypes don't apply to you correctly cause you're an exception. maybe you are really not an exception. I don't know. but i do know that the stereotype is accurate and exists for that exact reason. stereotypes that aren't accurate don't persist.

[myTake Owner]

Except most older women dating younger men aren't aggressively 'hunting' them or fettishizing them, as the name implies

[genericname85]

says you and what sample size of people you observed that from?

[Anonymous]

your first problem is caring about what other's think of your relationship

granted it won't stop them from judging nor should they be stopped from judging but it's your life and yours only

[myTake Owner]

People who make this retort are often thinking about Leonardo Dicaprio men who are in their late 40s and early 50s trying to date women in their late teens and early 20s. That's not an apples to apples comparison to what I'm talking about. There's a big difference between that and someone in their early 40s dating someone else in their late 20s.

If a man in his early 40s was dating a woman in her late 20s he would not be getting nearly the flack that a woman in her early 40s dating a man in his late 20s (like me) would be getting

[myTake Owner]

Sorry, that reply was meant for a different comment.

I completely agree with the comment here!

[DrPepper12]

Ya got my vote! people, this is SO simple! STFU & MYOB.