Why is height such a big deal to women? If I'm a great guy isn't that enough?

[NotJustAGuy]

I'm 163cm (5'3, pretty sure) and constantly being told you're a really great guy and I would date you but you're just too short for me. I'm not going for really tall girls they may only be just taller.

Height is everything

Height isn't important

[andreafs1]

For most girls it is important to be with a guy that is taller than herself because of human nature. Since the beginning of the human specie, the man has always had to be the "Stronger" one in the relationship. Since prehistoric ages, the man has been the one that has to protect the tribe/family, go hunting for food, protect his land, etc.

Even though we have evolved and of course we are not prehistoric by any means, in our brains there's still this "protective" quality we look for in guys, its like a self-preservation gene that we have. Also for reproducing, women have always looked for the "stronger" men, because that would guarantee the survival of her offspring and herself. In some girls, this self-preservetion gene is much stronger, and this is why they will refuse by any means to date a guy who has a much smaller frame than theirs, since they won't feel protected and might not feel attracted to him. Its a unconscious thing that happens in most of girls' brains.

Of course this isn't applied to every girl. There's a bunch of girls that don't care about it, and are much more emotional than physical.

[NotJustAGuy]

See I have to disagree, it feels like you're trying to justify woman's preference in a taller man by saying that shorter men are less able to provide for their girl/family... Personally I think now days it's comes down more to intelligence, a good job and physical ability... No?

[andreafs1]

No, I'm not saying shorter men are less able to provide. I'm just saying there is something in a girl's subconsciousness that makes her desire a man PROPORTIONAL (aka taller) to her height.

Like I was telling you, a woman's brain would immediately relate this as ability to provide and care.

If you are shorter, you'd have to be with a shorter girl than yourself to maintain that "natural" sense of protectiveness.

As I said, this doesn't happen in all cases.

[NotJustAGuy]

I guess instinctively yes you'd feel more protected with someone taller but I just don't think it has to be to the point where you wouldn't consider looking beyond the height factor...
However naturally I'm not attracted to really tall women because it feels strange.
My entire debate is if she's only a little taller it really shouldn't matter much

I can see we're never gonna agree on this haha

[andreafs1]

Of course height isn't a defining point in a relationship. I have dated shorter guys and it hasn't been a problem for me since I'm more attracted to a guys personality. But like you said, sometimes it does feel strange.
You asked why it is such a big deal to women, so that was my honest opinion. I guess it's all related to human nature and instincts.
Everyone has different likes and opinions so no, it doesn't matter much.

Yeah, we will never agree lol

[SpiderLady]

You know, to me it's not really a big deal. But I think a bit of peer pressure could be put on a girl for being interested in a short guy. I don't get it honestly. For instance, most of the cutest of the cutest guys were pretty short and if I might comment on how cute a guy is my friends or sisters will always comment, "yeah but he's short." So the bleeping what.

I guess I'm into shortish petite guys. As long as he isn't shorter than me. And I guess I can get away with that because I'm pretty petite myself.

[SpiderLady]

On thing that does bother me about some short guys are sometimes they're either too self confident or too insecure. Be confident with yourself and don't worry what others think about your height. Don't let such a think put you down and don't let being short make you feel the need to "prove" yourself to others.

[SpiderLady]

Yuk. Typos.

[NotJustAGuy]

Haha it's all good I got the main point of what you were saying... Height doesn't really matter, you have a preference that they are short not so much shorter and that's ok every likes what they like... But in the end it's stupid how people are so caught up on height that they can't see that someone is hot, handsome or bf material :P
Just seems like a shallow attitude that people seem to just accept

[SpiderLady]

Society teaches us to be really shallow these days. It's all about what we see in media and such and how what's being seen is perceived as "attractive". No, don't let society bully you; like who you like (as long as it's appropriate).

[NotJustAGuy]

:) I'd never let someone bully me into thinking something... Thanks SpiderLady

[SpiderLady]

You're welcome c:

[Dcosse]

People like what they like and some girls aren't going to be attracted to a guy that's 5'3. Personality is great but physical attraction is necessary. I'm 4'10 and typically date guys 5'6 and up. Shorter guys just don't do it for me. Find a girl that does like you for who you are and is attracted to your height. Also, most girls don't want to date someone shorter than them so go for shorter girls.

[ryanontario]

its tough to explain why height is such an issue for some girls or something they find so attractive that being tall guys. but being short would make dating more difficult for many. I don't know why some girls would make height more important than other aspects of the guy such as personality or his genuine interest in them. but a lot of girls do like taller guys that is a fact of dating

[Plato]

You know, Michael Corleone isn't tall and I bet his personality would have been a big hit if he existed. I think there's a lot of good preconceived notions of short persons you could take advantage of (such as being smart and very knowledgeable). Etcetera.

[yintomyyang]

Height is somewhat important, when a tall guy hugs a short girl its like a giant blanket wrapped around u.

I'm 5'6 and my bf is 5'5 I fell for his personality- I feel loved safe and secured with him plus his eyes and smile are amazing <3

to me dating a guy that's super short would make me feel like I'm dating alil kid (sorry :/)

we all have our preference in who were attracted too and we all have different views

[camp8989]

height isn't everything, but I'm going to be honest and say women want a guy who is at least an inch or two taller than them. so even though you're on the shorter side, their are girls shorter, and there are also girls who exist who don't care (just not that I know). just being honest,

[musicbrain5]

Height is somewhat important to me. I am 6'1" and most guys are around my height or fairly close to it. Not that I wouldn't go out with a shorter man, but I would think he feels weird being much shorter than me.

[NotJustAGuy]

See I understand if it's a massive difference in height because yes I would feel awkward being with a girl that towers over me I'm only say of she's just a bit taller it shouldn't matter...

[GoldCobra]

If i'm a great guy isn't that good enough?
Nope, height plays a huuuge role in a guy for attraction. A lot of girls love a tall man.

Do you still have a chance?
Hell yeah you still have a chance and a good one too if you're a good guy and a girl sees that. Some girls will overlook the height and go for you.

[Whammywhammy]

I wouldn't say that height is EVERYTHING, but to me I just haven't been attracted to someone my height/shorts (but then again I'm tiny..5ft lol) I wouldn't say it's being shallow unless you someone is triply being particular. There HAS to be attraction in a relationship period.(doesn't mean you have to have a 6pack or a toned ass) If I found someone with the right personality (that's #1 towards attractive-ness?) in my book! It wouldn't matter their height!

[parisfox]

Height isn't everything but height isn't unimportant either. I think it's a "bonus", like if you're taller it makes you more attractive

[Mocha_Couture]

Height isn't important but sadly some girls like taller guys... And were the same height lol :D

[sweetiebug7]

It's just another one of those superficial things people care about. Honestly, if a girl can't get over the fact your'e not super tall, she's not good enough. Find someone who loves you no matter what :)

[Anonymous]

Some girls just care too much about what others think, and don't want to be looked at as being out of the 'norm'. Personally I think that's silly.

[Anonymous]

Heights never really mattered to me :)
But it does seem to be important to a lot of people for what ever reason...

[Anonymous]

a person once said.

"a short man to a women is a fat chick to guy"

[Marihorror]

The same reason why most guys like thin girls.

[NotJustAGuy]

No I don't think it is, see over weight is a life style... Short is just genetics, yes I know some people have that genetic problem where they can't loose weight but the majority are choosing to be overweight because fit and healthy is too hard to maintain... I would kill to have the option of if I work for it I can get taller...

[Marihorror]

I understand what you're saying but my point was that society has certain standards of how people of both genders should look. One of those standards for men is that he should be tall. It's unfortunate, but guys who aren't tall get the short end of the stick. No pun intended.

[TheCanuck]

Size matters ;)