Why do some girls expect an expensive first date?

Question

I don't know if i'm cheap or something... but I wouldn't mind at all having a first date just walking outside, talking and then eating at McDonald's xD.

But i've seen that most girls seem to think a guy should take them out at an expensive restaurant...
If you're one of those girls why do you think they should?

I have a hard hard time understanding... because to me what's important is that we get to know each other and spend a good time together... not the amount of money he's willing to pay on our date...

EgyptianNergerts · Accepted Answer

My mom always told me to make a man work so..
I just feel like whatever you allow in the beginning, will continue and he would feel like it doesn't take much to love me (if we proceeded to an actual relationship). You don't have to take me out to Red Lobster, that's absurd (only if he wanted to though). I wouldn't mind going to a coffee shop just to talk or somewhere like Chilli's or a movie.

On a side note:
Men nowadays like to play victim on how we girls/women "treat" them. They're just upset because they've finally realized that spending a lot of money still won't get them "laid". See how every time a girl is the topic regarding treatment here on GaG, it's gonna be that ONE guy that claims we're too spoiled? Bunch of cry babies. Menimists are nothing but crying man children who can hardly get a woman, so they turn around and blame us for all their failures and then proceed to call us slutty (because it helps them sleep alone at night), ALL BECAUSE we would refuse to do anything "slutty" with them. To the guys that complain left and right on here, just try dating guys and shut up.

Elena_the_Star · Accepted Answer

It is important to get to know each other but personally, I prefer an expensive restaurant because almost everyone expects to be on their best in the start of the relationship.. XD. I am fine with both but I like if the guy is trying to impress me and has put some thought into our date.
Eating at McDonalds is the worst thing for me, I would eat my lipstick and don't get me started about my eating habits...
About paying, essentially the one who takes the other one out should pay, and I prefer one person to pay since my maths is just about terrible. If I am taking him out, I am paying and he is, then he is paying or we will somehow split it. Also, an exception hee is if one person is poor and other is rich or theydon't have the same financial background.
Bottom line, for me, plan an expensive date if you really like your date, not some casual chap.

Darkfairie17 · Accepted Answer

I agree with you. Especially the first date because you don't know if things are going to go anywhere. And it's not fair to expect him to pay for a super expensive place, if he's going to have to then turn around and do that for another girl or several more girls until he finds one who wants to be with him.

I think a cheap place is totally acceptable. The date can be a trip to McDonald's for all I care, and maybe a walk to some neat places, maybe get some ice cream somewhere. You know, just explore the city or do some fun activity. Doesn't have to cost a lot.

I find the cheaper dates tend to allow me to get to know the guy better.

Lucylou1990 · Accepted Answer

It's because you're genuine :-)

Two people are interested, they go out because they want to enjoy spending time together.

To me dating is that simple. I don't know why so many people insist on making it complicated. If I'm out with a guy it's because I want to get to know him, not let him spend money on me. It's why I always isnist on paying my way. 1) One it's an unfair double standard, I believe in equality. 2) It's him I'm interested in, not his money. 3) i don't want to create an expectation that I owe him anything.

ccp16 · Accepted Answer

Well I don't know about McDonald's... but I usually go low key on a first date, especially if it is someone I don't really know. I think spending all this money and having a fancy meal sets expectations too high for the evening and can stress people out! My favorite dates actually only include dinner if it is going well and we want to spend more time together, I always make it so if either of us wants, we could bail after an hour or something.

I agree though, just a casual drink, or something light is the best way, then you can do more if you like each other- I find that form to be a way less formal date to be more natural and fun! None of this, pick her up, buy fancy dinner and movie BS lol

longjohndan · Accepted Answer

Generally, I don't like to make a first date expensive because it seems fake and forced or even desperate. I try to keep it midrange or below and focus on experiential type things. The more expensive stuff generally comes later I think at least for me.

OlderAndWiser · Answer

My perception is that some girls think an expensive first date is a way of a guy showing that he is willing to treat her like she is special and that will set him apart from other guys.

RJGraveyTrain · Answer

Issues with self entitlement. Plain and simple.

itsagirlthing900 · Answer

what you said about the getting to know the person is more important than how much he spends on you is true. but I think for a first date a nicer restraunt would be a good idea because it shows how much you care and it's a good first impression that you are going to treat your girl right. but I wouldn't expect you nor would I want to go to a fancy dinner every date just for special occasions like and anniversary, or a first date, or when you have important news to announce like a promotion. and sometimes just because

NerdInDenial · Answer

Many guys think spending a lot of money will impress the girl, and she'll have sex with him. However, that is far from the truth.

Anonymous · Answer

I'm the same way you are. When my boyfriend and I first hung out, all we did was walk around and then sit in his mothers van getting to know each other. Granted, we were both 16 years old at the time. However, just that alone was enough for him to win me over. I've never been big on expensive things, honestly. I would much rather him save his money for something he needs. I just don't understand the whole "spend lots of money on our first date" shit. Like, why? So you can make sure he financially will support you later on? To me that is just greedy and self centered.

TamaEggNogg · Answer

If a girl demands to go to a expensive restaurant for a first date, then they are the type of girls men should stay away from.. unless you're Angelina Jolie or something. Then again I'm a nerd and would love to spend my date in a comic book store so what do I know :P

DodgersGM · Answer

More than anything else, I think it boils down to what people value, and what people feel like they have to offer.

A dude who sees his money as one of his greatest personal assets will likely try to buy a girl's affections.

Similarly, a woman who values money will likely want to be bought.

Anonymous · Answer

Dropping money in a way that suggests it's no big deal makes you seem powerful and increases attraction.

Spending a lot in a way that suggests you're trying hard makes you look either desperate, or like you view her as a hooker you pay to get something from.

Safer bet is to take her for drinks or coffee on a first date anyway.

BrunetteNYC · Answer

Because it's called good manners. If a person is making a first impression, he/she should have the good sense to do it RIGHT, not on the cheap.

Here's a little warning story... my niece's parents through her this costly birthday party at a catering hall only to have it crashed by her boyfriend's parents trying to call it 'an engagement party.' They were the laughing stock and looked so cheap and petty, well your mother was right, men who do such things to you and don't care to do right about you NEVER change. This guy and his family have treated her like s**t since Day One.

No manners, no class, no respect, no happy relationship.

Hidden_P · Answer

I don't know about you but I would hope for the absolute opposite of an expensive date. I would feel obliged to go on a following date because he spent so much and I wouldn't want to just be like "lol thanks for splashing cash but no".
I would much rather something low key where it's about getting to know each other. Also it means I don't have to spend 2 hours getting ready and changing my outfit 6 times because I look fat etc etc.

We can do fancy dates on anniversaries. When it's worth it.

throwit · Answer

I think a lot of older girls expect the guy to pay on a first date. I don't know anyone my age who expects the guy to pay, or who doesn't regularly pay for their boyfriend and themselves.
And if they do they're cheap and greedy and live in a fantasy world.

luvstoned4him · Answer

When am dating a guy I tend to not expect much because after all he isn't mine yet.. However when we have established a more concrete relationship.. I would expect more but am usually considerate. Some women tend to ask for unrealistic gifts and I think that you need to be considerate , taking into account the guys needs, the salary is working for among other things

shikyoon · Answer

I'd love the walking talking macdonalds idea :D, first date with my now boyfriend was actually after my training, on the track, talking, then in his car drinking coffee and eating cookies, it was perfect for me and we had so much fun. When two people like each other they dont need fancy stuff to enjoy each others company

Accipiter · Answer

I never met a woman like that, but I'm sure they exist. I wouldn't feel comfortable taking a girl to a fancy restaurant on a first date unless it was a special occasion. The first date should be about valuing the first time the two of you spend together.

oddwaffle · Answer

May be I'm just strange. I always let her pick the location for 1st date and I will agree to pay for it. You'll generally have an idea of the person depending on the food and place they pick.

I'm not rich by any means but I do set a budget for having a fancy dinner once in a while.

Bandit74 · Answer

I think its funny, especially considering a lot of those girls who want to be wined and dined are the same ones who hop into bed on the first date with guys they get drunk with at clubs/parties.

meatballs21 · Answer

They already spent their paycheque on shoes and handbags, and figure they is all that, and want to be 'kept in the style to which they are accustomed'.

Thor696 · Answer

It's fine if you're looking for a really nice guy who works as a veterinary assistant for minimum wage. Expect to struggle in a marriage though. Expect that you may have to support him. Expect that he may be a wonderful guy - but sucks at picking his shit up and you have to do most of the house cleaning. And - expect that you'll have to do all that after you've done a hard days work because he doesn't make enough money to support you. Expect that, at some point you'll have to totally support him and put him through school so that he can gain the skills to become a competent provider so you can do things like have kids.

Seen it a million times.

Expensive dates signal to a woman that a man is good provider. All men come with baggage - the ability to be a strong provider mitigates a hell of a lot of baggage and just makes things easier for the both of you.

Anonymous · Answer

That's a good question, because I sure don't. I just want to have fun and get to know the guy, I don't need to spend money or a lot of money for that. I do not understand why some people expect certain things. I also go Dutch, so I pay for myself and he can pay for himself. If we get together exclusively and decide we want to spend a lot of money on a trip, I'll still pay my share.

Anonymous · Answer

I love women like you, beautiful on the outside and even more beautiful on the inside. You don't have to spend a single cent to have a great date, that is something I need to remember the next time I use my credit card.

Najii · Answer

It's not about the money he's willing to pay for the date, if I do go on a date then I would prefer to pay for myself. I go to a fancy place is because that's where I would generally go if I go out for dinner with my friends. And if that's the type of place I go with my friends then lmao I won't let me first date be in a fast food or anything. It totally depends on the person and their life style.

Anonymous · Answer

I personally wouldn't care how expensive or cheap (just not McDonalds! haha), but I would hope that he had put some thought into it.

JadedandReckless · Answer

expensive? I think you mean extra effort to make it special. no? don't date at all

Octavius · Answer

Going to a restaurant for a first date is an awful idea. How am I supposed to get to know them if they have their mouth full of food?

Sweetbrunette305 · Answer

I've never expected a guy to take me to a fancy place on a first date. Actually, all the first dates I had took place in coffee shops, bookstores, the movies, inexpensive restaurants (not fast food chains though).

udolipixie · Answer

Why do some girls expect an expensive first date?
Likely for the same reason guys seem to expect sex/sexual activity before entering a relationship. That reason being some associate worth to the act.

For some gals how much a guy is willing to spend on her correlates to his interest and investment of her. No different than for some guys how sexual a gal is willing to be correlates to her interest of him.

Riverock · Answer

1. Because some of them confuse a guy who's paying a lot for a guy who cares a lot.
2. Because some of them have old fashioned ideas that men are supposed to give them what they want in exchange for sex. And they want an expensive meal.

shortandsweet24 · Answer

I'm not sure what women you've been hanging around with, but... I've always believed that if you really like a guy, just being with him was the best part of a date.

Though, that's just my opinion. You can take it however you would like to...

Mustachekitteh · Answer

Oh god I would HATE to go on an expensive first day. That would be so fucken awkward and even worse if it goes really bad. I would just reject them and say,"I'm sorry but I can't afford that so I can't go on a date with you."

cankles · Answer

I don't now what you're talking about. Most of the dates I have been on have been very inexpensive, only getting more expensive once it became a relationship. Was I doing something wrong? LOL...

Anonymous · Answer

I don't know, i haven't met a girl who cared as of yet. I did however spend 100 on my first date with 1 girl just because it was a big event i wanted to attend anyway, and obviously it would be rude to make plans for something like that and auto expect her to have the cash when i never met her before.

Generally though, i keep it cheap and unless there are money problems (which no one has complained of yet) i go dutch. Seriously no one has, to my knowledge, judged me on it yet :)

Mesonfielde · Answer

It is because the girls you speak of see men only as a walking wallet. They are sexist from the core.

Danixo · Answer

if a girl wants an expensive FIRST date, (in my opinion) it seems like she might only be in it for your money.. i just feel like if you're sincerely into someone, it shouldn't matter what kinda date ya go on, as long as y'all are having fun & are just connecting on an emotional level. I understand more expensive dates when you've been dating for awhile and you just want a special evening, but I just don't get it for a first date. whoops.

Zendrya · Answer

I have no idea because they are materialistic and think their love should be bought. I'm cool with a coupon date honestly. The cheaper the better as long as the food is still good.

orphan · Answer

Dates are like interviews and a woman's time is valuable. Unfortunately, some grossly inflate their self worth. What you're suggesting, is not common.

DiegoL82 · Answer

I think you are right jessicorn, it doesn't matter how much money is going to pay but to enjoy the time together. It can be a good evening watching a movie at home or going for a walk together.

lumos · Answer

Because they're entitled little shits who don't understand the true value of getting to know a person without spending a single penny.

boobieslover · Answer

I think it's perfect to go to McDonald's in first date😂😂not for the money thing but it's more comfortable and the date is to know each other not for spending much money.
you're the one that any guy dreams to date btw😂😂😂 others are just impressed with money

Anonymous · Answer

Based on my experience these girls, unlike you, do not care about connecting, and if they do they want to connect with a guy who is willing to spend money on them, preferably rich. Either they just want a free meal, or a rich man.

tiredoftrying · Answer

I think a lot of girls think that if a guy does not take them on an expensive first date then he doesn't really like her and/or he is only looking for sex. Unfortunately, I think this comes from their friends, chick flicks and romantic novels.

asiag299 · Answer

Way to make a completely wrong generalization. Are you trying to build yourself up or something. You have that mentality that i see with a lot of girls on here who post stuff like this just to get praises from the men commenting get a life and stop making assumptions! For the record before someone comes with some B. S I don't expect expensive first dates but I'm not eating McDonald either that's mostly do to the fact that I'm vegan though :)

ZionOrtov · Answer

Personality and culturally based expectations. Personally, I believe that a date should be about the time spent together, and the effort to make each other happy.

Transigence · Answer

Women like that are essentially whores. What they are doing is "trading on vagina." It's absolutely denigrating to men. It's an implicit statement that male sexuality is worthless.

MysteriousFlower · Answer

I like a romantic date, doesn't have to be expensive but passionate and feeling great. Which I'm not getting, so I give up.

Sailormoonprincess · Answer

I'd rather have a cheap date.. Because there's less pressure to act all classy... preferably somewhere like the public pools or bowling

LJCeritez · Answer

An expensive first date is a waste of money and time, you would wanna spend time getting to know each other, not being fascinated by the $800 napkins

GirlyGal20 · Answer

Yeah I don't get it either... I'd be fine with what you mentioned. Except for Mcdonalds, its kinda gross.

Roostah · Answer

Because those girls are gold diggers and want guys with deep pockets.

Anonymous · Answer

some girls see it as the guy isn't putting much effort or he thinks you are not even worth investing in on the first date. also it could mean that he is cheap. It's a first impression and shows that you don't value her that much or cheap or didn't put in the effort

Anonymous · Answer

First date:  Went for a walk and then went to a party at a teacher's house! It's definitely not one I'll forget! Obviously it worked though, we're still together!

SuccessfulOVO · Answer

I don't care, I'm good with anything as long as I'm with the person. I wouldn't care if we just stayed home, cuddle, eat pizza, and watch Netflix.

Moonish · Answer

Because they want a fairy-tale and a first impression is the biggest.

Goldie757 · Answer

Lol in the UK we expect men to take us to the local Nandos. 😂

Lyoness101 · Answer

well i dont care bring me to mcDonalds or KFC and i will be okay😂🙌

Anonymous · Answer

Well I know what ur asking my friend insists on making her date suffer by making him buy her really expensive stuff to show him that she's high class its a stupid thing really n cheap character

apple24 · Answer

I never been on a date. I don't want expensive just a fun date!

KingMercury · Answer

Sometimes guys like to show off how much money they have. Or they just like showing that they can take someone out somewhere nice. It's not that Mcdonalds won't suffice, I would just be worried that the person I'm taking out might think I'm cheap or that I don't care about my date.

loltheresa · Answer

honestly I'm more into the cliche type of dates. like walking on the beach with an icecream cone or going to the movies.

cinderelli · Answer

I don't expect expensive first dates.. I just want to have fun and want it to be memorable.. :)

IslandGent · Answer

I don't know, they want to be treated like a Queen. ... Like all the time. .-.

Why do some girls expect an expensive first date?

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