I have been in a long distance relationship, I live in Indiana and he lived in California. We called and texted a lot and he even sent me a very sweet Christmas present. It seemed perfect, and then he ghosted the hell out of me and disappeared into thin air. Literally, he was sick in the hospital and we fell asleep on the phone together and the next morning the call had ended which it typically did so I texted him good morning and never received a reply. I seriously thought he was dead for a while and had serious issues and self esteem problems stemming from this incident. I only recently was able to contact him and get some sort of explanation that was complete bull shit. So I'm very weary of entering another long distance relationship. If I really liked the guy I would consider it but we would have to be friends for a long time first.
I'd never enter into a LDR. They are too challenging and too difficult to maintain. It's rare they survive the distance , coz over time trust issues develop and insecurities surface.
You can't know a persons true character until you see how they are in real life situations and circumstances. So I couldn't fall in love with someone online, coz I need to know a guy on a deeper level before I fall in love.
The ultimate goal of a LDR is to close the distance by one person uprooting to be with the other. That's a huge sacrifice to make.
I'm too affectionate to be satisfied in a LDR. I love to spend quality time with with a guy I love. I thrive on affections, cuddles, kisses.. all you have in a LDR is texts , calls, and video calls that's not enough to make a relationship survive long- term
Not for me - and I've never seen one actually work out successfully long term. Realistically one person will need to move, if at least one if not both of you aren't willing to potentially do that down the line for either a LTR or marriage then what's the point of starting it? My brother in law has been in a LDR for 4 years. Neither of them want to move, each hates the others country and misses their family. He moved there for 12 months to trial it but hated it and she refused to try for 12 months here. So where does that leave them? It's a crazy hard decision to make! I need that physical proximity... to touch and just be with each other is really important to me and brings a great deal of comfort and happiness.
Hard to manage. in my opinion a relationship can only be truly official if you can and do meet. If not then a closest thing to an LDR that people could do is simply wait and strive for the chance to meet, but keep options relatively open (as in, don't go out of your way to find someone, but don't turn the chance away if it presents itself to you). At least that's what I'm doing with my crush who lives far away.
Bad idea.. When you finally meet in person, it's like starting all over again but worse. That connection that was built online is pretty much gone, but the assumption of already being close before still lingers in the mind. It's awkward to start and can work out, but don't count on it.
@frozenhorizon Well, if you had fun for awhile then you could consider yourself fortunate.. I don't really have much to go off of to say one way or the other for your situation.
I've been there twice. Challenging but I'd recommend it for independence and strong people who won't cheat after their partner. LDR is all about trust issue and the time, barriers and everything. If you can't stay loyal, then dont break someone's heart by saying "we're far. this won't work".
Been there done that, not something I want to go threw again.
The vast majority of ldr do not work out, you can never really know someone until you actually spend real face to face time with them. Something you can not do, by talking on the phone texting or what ever else you use to communicate threw.
I just don't see the point in being with someone when you can't be with them...
Like, if it's a temporary situation and you're a long term couple, I get it. But I'll never understand people who start dating someone long distance. Seems silly to me.
It only works on the short term or if your a couple who didn't start out as that, but entering into a ldr is incredibly stupid... and was meant to pick the first one rather than the second
i dont think its possible FOR ME at least. i find it hard to trust my boyfriend even when he's in the same country as me. how can i trust him to not go to another girl when he has not been with me physically and felt how fun i can be with? someone in his country who can easily give him physical satisfaction would be able to steal him away so easily.
I don't think they're stupid but it seems like it's mostly for younger people who don't really have the confidence or financial resources to meet up in person.
I'm one of in LDR. it's not for everybody, it need trust, and really strong emotion to the person. also it can only succeed if there's a goal at the end - marriage or moving in together, if not.. nah don't even consider it. It's hard
They are great for people who are extremely independent and prefer their own space and don't like going out much. If you need that physical connection, like most people, then they are dumb and it is only a matter of time before it ends in failure.
They are great for those who simply need to know they have at least someone in their life who thinks about them. Not so much if your clingy. Really LDRs heavily depend on the persons psychological control.
If the ldr takes place after being together in person for a few years, then I understand as I am thinking that he is gone for a few months, and will be back soon.
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Anonymous
(30-35)
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I personally wouldnt/couldn't do it. I am too much of a physical person to have the one I love not in my reach.
I have nothing against it. I know a friend who is in a LDR, and it works. I believe it will only work if the persons involved are both mature and the relationship is mature enough that a long separation is ok.
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