My girlfriend is mentally unstable what can I do?

[boomerang]

Her moods are very unstable. She gets angry or irritated so easily one day but other day she doesn't mind to the same thing at all. I don't know how to deal with it.

[Angelo75]

First thing to do, make it crystal-clear that you're both gonna go through this "TOGETHER".
Let her feel that you are not planning on leaving because she has darkerdays.

Secondly, try to check if she gets a stable sleep. Turns out sleep is very important for the mental state. Seems if you keep changing the hours you go to bed and wake up, it messes you up a lot. And also the length has to be "enough". Some need 6 and other need 8 hours. Varies per person. It is also important for her not to be sleeping in the "light-sleep-state" only. It seems that some medication (and alcohol) will knock you out and you fall asleep, but you stay in the lighter sleep state and almost never go into deeper sleep. So you still wake up half-broken. Doctors/Psychs will help you with that.

Thirdly, try to dig with her to the cause. Maybe it's old unsolved trauma. Also here professionals are a very good help.

Last but definitely not least, do your best to avoid the mistake of basing your knowledge only on knowledge shared on forums. Get knowledge with help of professionals.

My wife also battles childhood and teen trauma's. I know the feeling.

Hang in there bro ... /fistbump

[experience]

Supporting a partner who is struggling with mental health issues can be challenging but also very important. Here are some steps you can take to help:

Educate Yourself: Learn about her condition and understand what she is going through. This will help you provide better support and recognize the signs when she needs help.

Encourage Professional Help: Gently encourage her to seek professional help if she hasn’t already. This could be in the form of therapy, counseling, or seeing a psychiatrist.

Be Supportive and Patient: Offer your support without judgment. Patience is key, as mental health issues often don’t have quick fixes.

Communicate Openly: Keep the lines of communication open. Listen to her without interrupting or offering solutions immediately.

Encourage Healthy Habits: Help her develop healthy habits like regular exercise, a balanced diet, and enough sleep.

Set Boundaries: While it’s important to be supportive, it’s also crucial to set boundaries to protect your own mental health. Make sure you’re not neglecting your own needs.

Practice Self-Care: Supporting someone with mental health issues can be draining. Make sure you’re taking care of yourself as well. This might include talking to a therapist yourself, engaging in hobbies, and maintaining a support system of your own.

Avoid Taking It Personally: Understand that her behavior is a result of her mental health issues and not a reflection of her feelings toward you. Try not to take her actions or words personally.

Develop a Crisis Plan: Work together to create a plan for what to do in case of a mental health crisis. This might include emergency contact numbers, steps to take, and how you can best support her in such times.

Be Encouraging, Not Forcing: Encourage her to participate in activities that make her feel good but avoid forcing her to do things she’s not ready for.

Know When to Seek Emergency Help: If she’s in immediate danger or has suicidal thoughts, seek emergency help immediately. This might involve calling emergency services or taking her to the nearest emergency room.

Supporting a partner with mental health challenges requires compassion, understanding, and a lot of patience. Remember that you’re not alone in this, and seeking support for yourself is also crucial...

[TheRealPepperPotts]

Just to clarify: By angry and irritable, do you mean she's throwing things, hitting and screaming? Or having sulks and getting upset because you put the pan on the top shelf instead of the bottom shelf? Because there's a lot of ways that angry and irritable could be interpreted.

If she's upset about little things and short in her speech and tone, and then fine the next day, that totally sounds like hormones to me. Both women and men underestimate the power of hormones to destroy a person's life. A hormone panel from a functional medicine MD could shed some light (Functional medicine MDs are board-certified MDs that integrate a holistic mindset into their practice).

If she is turning into She-Hulk, then more help is needed to support her in finding meds and therapy that will benefit her.

Either way, you'll need some support here, both professionally and personally. She might not take the suggestion from you, but she might from someone else.

[RavVid]

Is it dramatically different from one day to the next or on the obvious 28 day cycle or slower. If slower it might be bipolar.

Was she different in the beginning in the early love phase? Has she changed since maybe living with you? Try and identify if there was a point where she changed bearing in mind people can hide stuff for a while but not for long periods.

It might be unreasonable reactions to you. YT Pyschacks has a couple of videos on why women pick fights and how not to fight with women. I'd suggest reviewing those to start with because that is under YOUR control not hers.

If you can talk to her friends and family and see what they say. Express that as concern for her well being not as to the interaction with you.

Her moods are not inherently your fault or problem. You always have the option to dump.

[AI Opinion]

Navigating the roller coaster of emotions with your partner can feel like trying to dance in a lightning storm, right? First off, echoing love and support in this whirlwind is key. Mental health is a complex beast, and understanding that her reactions aren't about you, but rather what she's battling internally, is crucial. Encourage her gently to seek professional support if she hasn't already. This isn't just about fixing a problem; it's about holding hands and walking through the storm together. While you can't be her therapist, you can be her rock. Consistency from you, alongside lots of patience and open, non-judgmental communication, will make a world of difference. And remember, taking care of your own mental health through this is just as important. 💑

[OfMiceandMen]

Perhaps she is bipolar and needs medication. All you can do is sit down with her and discuss it. Maybe she's been considering therapy already. Just make sure you don't take a judgmental standpoint and just ask her if she's noticed the mood swings. If she can't discuss it like a mature adult and gets all hissy about it then it may not be worth pursuing.

[lightbulb27]

Pricide wmotional support and reassurance. Address anypart of your relationship that is feeding her instability.
Just accept thats how she is… is it hormonal. Encourage better choices for her.


Decide you cannot handle her.

[lightbulb27]

Pray for her and with her.
Dirt changes, thetapy and inner work.
Reduce stress

[Anonymous]

May have bipolar or BPD like such or not... It's going to be only downhill afterward. I have experienced and even tried to help and taken to doctors and taken care but in the end, you will be exhausted dealing with mental torture on a regular basic... leave

[Massageman]

Deal her out and find someone who is stable.

[genericname85]

well there's always the option "not" to be with her xD

[OtterMan68]

encourage her to seek counseling, and if she refuses, she doesn't want to change, so then dump her

[DextroShade]

Don't take her seriously, she is recreational use only!

[noohair]

She needs professional help. You don't have the professional knowledge or skills to do this on your own.

[imfreeze95]

If this escalates and she starts abusing you. LEAVE.

[SotiCoto]

Give up and leave her.

[jahaims]

Don't put up with an adult acting like a child

[FuqUFggt]

Run. Run away as fast as you can

[KrakenAttackin]

Move on. She will only get worse.

[dolemite58]

Welcome to manhood 🤣

[Anonymous]

Stop pushing her buttons.

[Goahead76]

It's called MGTOW

[Alex-Snow]

Get her some therapy