What are your thoughts on an open relationship?

Question

My boyfriend and I had a long talk last night about open relationships. What are your thoughts. Good or bad idea?

hellionthesagereborn · Accepted Answer

Its a horrible idea. A relationship requires not only work but commitment. So with an open relationship your basically saying that the relationship is difficult and instead of investing in it your going to run off and get your jollies some where else. You can't have a relationship without investment and biologically speaking, no matter what people may try to say, we are not built for open relationships. Sex releases a hormone in the brain called oxytocin which is responsible for feelings of closeness, happiness and is responsible, among other things, for social bonding. your using the very mechanism that brings you closer to your partner with random people you meet. The end result is it stops being intimate because your giving it to every one you fancy, it stops being an affective method of connection because again, your using it for every one, and it results in you creating a bond with some one else other then your partner (that's why people who have open relationships, swing, what have you, have long lists of rules one of which is a limitation on how many times you sleep with a particular partner because it will inevitably lead to emotional attachment). Then the fact that your brain will slowly be wired to encourage this behavior, of sleeping around so when you stop or have a limit places on you your going to feel withdrawal from this behavior (this has been shown to occur with porn addicts, it actually causes depression and in order to alleviate it they end up watching more porn which just deepens the neural pathways that are causing the problem to begin with. Also the more sexual partners you have the more likely you are to cheat/divorce/be unhappy in the relationship and its important to note that people who suffer from "nymphomania" actually report not enjoying sex because unsurprisingly they do it so often it is no longer special). Then you have the fact that if your missing something in your relationship then ignoring it isn't going to fix your relationship, its kind of like having a leaky roof and instead of fixing it or getting a roofer to do so you just go out and party, sure it feels nice and you stopped thinking about the issue but its still their nothing was done and the longer you wait the worse its going to get. Its hard to get data on this since open relationships are still frowned upon (and with good reason when you think about it) but most relationship specialist report a high failure rate in these relationships because of these things.

OlderAndWiser · Accepted Answer

If you have an open relationship, aren't you and your boyfriend just agreeing to be FWB? The idea of a relationship is commitment and an open relationship is a contradiction of commitment. I understand that there is a small minority of people who claim that they can have a committed relationship and be polyamorous; I assume that if you were one of those people, you would not be asking that question.

If you are seriously contemplating this idea, consider these questions:

1. Is it possible that one of you really doesn't want an open relationship but will agree to it because they think the other alternative is to break up?

2. Will your boyfriend tell you about the sex he has with other girls? If he does, how will you feel when he tells you how beautiful her naked body is? How good it felt when he came inside her? If he doesn't tell you, why not? You are in a relationship and you aren't suppose to have secrets from each other.

3. What if he forms an attachment to another girl who is also "okay" with an open relationship and he decides to take her - instead of you - away for a long weekend vacation?

4. How will you feel if he says that he has fallen in love with someone else?

5. What if the other girl claims she is using BCP but is not and gets pregnant?

6. How will you feel if he says he wants to spend Christmas with her instead of you?

7. How will you feel if he says he doesn't have money to take you out for a nice dinner for your dating anniversary and you know that he just spent some money taking her out somewhere nice?

Some young people act like they are think they are supposed to act a certain way - cool, carefree, no strings attached, not clingy, be a "modern" girl - but all of that runs counter to their feelings. Here is what you need to understand: it is perfectly okay to want to have someone all to yourself, to not want to share him, and it is okay to expect a guy to have that same level of commitment to you. If he doesn't share your passion for being committed to each other, perhaps you need to face a harsh truth - he is not the right guy for you.

I hope this helps.

mjz00 · Accepted Answer

hi, straight off the bat and i know this will sound judgmental, take this openness between you as a great intuitive connection and a possibility and likeness of minds and keep that in your hearts as a major life gift to find a partner whom you can be this open with. then seal it away for a time of possibility in the far future years down the line when you have lived, loved and burned the bright lights of energy that are here now between you and perhaps later much later it will be there to enhance, energise, enliven what you two have evolved along the way. for a couple to take any steps into stepping outside the perimeter of just the two of you will take the upmost fundamental grounding two people could have... for it to work out at its best potential. that said you two could have some special connection that i would not dare to deny or begin to claim to understand, baby steps, discussions, fantasy, ideas, are a brilliant process but practise is another matter altogether xx i would like to have a more private chat on pm if you are interested xx

Juventina · Accepted Answer

If both of you are open to at least try it, you can test it out to see if its doable. Believe or not, open relationships aren't as freeing as some people believe. There are still rules that come into play. for example, whats crossing the line, what isn't. Are you allowed to date other people? Are you allowed to have sex with others? Do you tell your partner when you are on a date?
It requires maturity, frequent communication and plenty of trust.

It's a good idea if you feel unsatisfied with manogomy, at least this way, seeing others won't be considered "cheating". Thats the only benefit I see from it.

It's a bad idea if you aren't 100% sure about it. If you and your partner are jealous people, if your relationship lacks communication & trust already. It could be challenging at first and it will really test your love for eachother. It's not easy.

lumos · Accepted Answer

My thoughts are that
1. It's not for me
2. A person who is monogamous in nature should not feel forced to abide to their partner's non-monogamous nature, I sometimes hear about such people who are sacrificing a big part of what they want in a relationship just because they don't want their partner to be unhappy (and vice versa - if you want different things just don't do it)
3. If you're the type to get jealous easily or who overthinks things, don't do it
4. It rarely seems to work out because people don't bother discussing rules and what to do/not do, where their boundaries are etc, so even if both people are on the same page technically, it's still likely that one of them will fuck up somehow and hurt the other person.

RJGraveyTrain · Accepted Answer

I find they're pointless and feelings will always get hurt. I am of the opinion of: don't share what you're not willing to lose.

Genie23 · Answer

It's a terrible idea. What's the even point of being with him/her then If you want to sleep with others?
I mean, if my guy ever suggested this. I would feel really hurt. It would make me he wants others because I'm not good enough for him... he doesn't love me etc.

I don't want to share my man, nor do I wish to sleep with someone else. It's gross. Even the thought of it, makes me feel disgusted.

MeGo99 · Answer

that is so f*cking disgusting and gross in so many ways

1) i wouldn't wanna catch an STD
2) its like a blow to my pride and everything i stand for if the girl i love is out getting rammed by different guys every night
3) if i love someone and they love me, why not just have sex with them instead of with them and others?
4) making love is much more pleasurable than meaningless sex
5) there is truly no such a thing as 'open relationship', its just a bunch of idiots who want someone thats always there for them and also want to have their fun as well
6) I would never date a hoe so this would never apply to me, and im not a desperate punk so I would never treat a girl like that

I understand that there is basically no such a thing as morals in the world today, but you can't hook up with people and also have a bf/gf as your rock, can't have the best of both worlds, if you want a bf/gf then so be it, if you want to have sex and party every other night, then so be it, but you can't combine the two, unless your tiger woods and look wtf happened to him.

Dme500 · Answer

i think open relationships are a good idea. the most common reason for divorce that i know of is cheating, however, if each person in the relationship is allowed to step out every once in awhile i think its better for the relationship. its important to remember that sex and love are 2 different things. you can remain committed to someone and still have sex outside the relationship.

the problem with cheating is its a betrayal of the other person. the same can be said for breaking the rules of an open relationship. thats just betrayal outside of the social norms. and please dont confuse open relationships with polyamorous relationships. the difference there is that an open relationship still leaves the heart at home. where polyamory spreads the heart thin.

the same can be said for affairs. this is subjective but i think most people would agree that a rule in open relationships should be no continual relations. thats when you start messing with the love in the relationship.

anyway as long as both parties agree with the rules and are willing to follow the rules, get tested regularly, and trust each other i can't see any problem with open relationships.

if i missed something let me know. i think i covered all the bases.

Anonymous · Answer

Really bad idea. You can't have feelings for a guy while fucking the other and expect your boy not to feel a thing inside and still act like its OK while he bangs another chick and the same goes for you. Break up if you want to fuck around, stay faithful if you want love and someone to trust it's that easy. It's cheating, out front, in each others faces believe it or not it will have consequences on your relationship (big bad ones) but it always depends on the people. I personally couldn't do it because it breaks each and every "law" of a relationship xD pure and simple people that do this love the freedom to do what they want more than they love each other that means love no no fuck yes yes basically.

The_Underground_Man · Answer

It is certainly better than cheating since both partners are at least aware and have agreed to each other's infidelity beforehand. But even then, the notion still disgusts me. I could never take another woman into my bed nor allow my partner to take another man into hers. Granted, I might let her sleep with other women. But she would owe me big time, and I mean really big time like performing a private pole dance for me or something. Otherwise the farthest I could probably ever go is watching porn together.

vonasaurus · Answer

while i am hardwired for monogamy, i get that it's not for everyone; consensual nonmonogamy is a legit option for those who can't or won't commit.

2 types of consensually nonmonogamous relationships:

-open relationships (swinging, fwbs, etc.)
-polyamory (two or more people in love)

both polyamory and open relationships have one thing in common: a set of rules (as decided by everyone involved) to ensure that everyone is happy with the arrangement. violating the established rules=cheating.

as long as everyone involved is happy with the way things are, i say live and let live.

however

if you are in an established monogamous relationship and are thinking of making the shift to one of the above models, both of you must be on the same page in order for the new relationship to work.

also, if you are even the slightest bit insecure (about "losing" your partner to someone else), then

ABORT MISSION AND RELOAD LAST SAVE.

otherwise, you'll be unhappy af.

nevermoregirl7 · Answer

So here is the difference between open and poly.

Open means you will allow each other a sexual partner that is nothing more than a fuck buddy. So nothing relationship involved like cutesy text messages or meeting this persons family.

Poly is when you agree to bring another person into your relationship as a partner. They don't necessarily have to have sex with both of you, but it is understood there is a commitment with that person.

Keep talking about it, feel 100% sure and make sure if you go through with it, communication is always open. Last thing you want is for either of y'all to feel like you can't say anything with fear of being a buzzkill.

Sara413 · Answer

Not for me. If other people are able to make it work and the arrangement is fulfilling for both partners, that s great! But often there is one partner pushing for it and the other just agrees for the sake of keeping the relationship - that isn't healthy. It should be something that both partners want and you need to be 100% on the same page about where you draw boundaries. And you have to have a lot of trust and a solid sense of security for it to work, even if both partners are into the idea.

I just think it is not something that can work for most people. Some can. To each their own!

AaronTupaz · Answer

It's the only relationship I'm interested in. It's like children. You will love your first born. But when you have a second or third one, you don't suddenly stop loving the first child. You'll love each child each in their own unique way. And it's kind of like friends. Some friends will stay with you for life. Some will come and go, and some will come and go and come back again. Exclusive relationships are like eating your favourite food again and again, morning, breakfast and dinner. You would get bored of it eventually. With open relationships, you're getting variety and you never take your favourite food for granted, especially if know your partners are dating others. This encourages you to be your best self each time.

D_Bone_Steak · Answer

All I ever see is a sausage party begin for her and a dude either realizing the deal isn't in his favor... or... he's the type of dude that enjoys the idea, presence, or sight of extra cocks.
My guess is that it works for the latter, but the prior usually ends up with one or both parties going through a plethora of verbal contracts and boundaries breaking.
You two have your own agendas and objectives, but any third party will have their own... and any will can be swayed in matters of lust and desire with opportunities at hand. i. e. despite prior agreement to only have safe sex, a partner could easily be swayed not to in the heat of the moment. An agreement to not give oral can easily be ignored with the right genitals presented.
Things can and will happen, and the other partner/partners will be none the wiser... until someone slips up, then all hell can break loose.

Barrabus_the_Free · Answer

Any man that would agree to one is the lowest, most disgusting form of simp. "Open" relationshit basically means she takes miles of strange cock, and unless he's a thug or trust fund baby he gets to fuck one or two other women every few months. Meanwhile, she's using him as an emotional tampon, walking ATM, etc.

Granted, it's not much different than 'regular' relationshits. But at least in a regular relationshit, she's generally at least *trying* to hide the fact that she's fucking a bunch of other men. She's not shoving her actions right in your face.

Anticipation · Answer

It is a fantasy lifestyle.

My wife and I fantasize and tease each other about others, she could mess around and so can I. The fantasy provides the mental rush enough for our love making to be very intense.

But when we sleep with someone else, we are essentially giving a little chunk of ourselves to someone else that belongs to our partner. If it is many, then we are giving bigger chunks of our heart.

I'm sure both you and your boyfriend can sleep with anybody, but you chose each other so that says a lot about your relationship.

Maybe you 2 aren't emotionally connected enough to want to stay true to each other, so it isn't like you and he has exclusively surrendered your heart to each other, so maybe it won't make a difference to you and he.

pretty-kitty · Answer

Personally I could never be in an open relationship, when I'm with someone I don't want anyone else and if he wanted me to be with other guys or didn't care then that would make me feel as though he doesn't love me. I also wouldn't want my man to be intimate with other women, that's something special between us.

In saying all that I pass no judgement on people who are in open relationships and I think their love can be just as real and strong as people in monogamous relationships. Who are we to judge what real love is? People love in different ways, just because it's not how I love or want to be loved that doesn't make it less important.

jaimy · Answer

I believe western culture is not "ready" for such drastik changes. From centuries of monogamic values opression and teachings of possesing things. Moreover, in this complex world, dealing with the emotions involved in relationships (friendhsip, romantic relationship, business relationship,...) is already painfull for people that dont learn young enough how to deal with them. Now this concept comes in. I think it makes sense in theory as nature allows it and loving is not attached to a number. but in practice... good luck finding people that much secure, stable and mature

Anonymous · Answer

I couldn't do it but since my guy and I don't believe in divorce (marriage is for life), he did say that if things between us got that bad, he'd be open to having an open marriage to help us to work. I guess I'd be open to that but I know I couldn't possibly do anything with anyone else because I know I only want him. Luckily though, we're that compatible, if we ever did get married then I know it'd never come to that.

rjroy3 · Answer

In my experience it's only a good idea in the beginning stages of dating. You're seeing her as well as other girls and you make that known, while she knows she is free to see other people as well. During that period of time you find out if you both are for eachother or not. To me I don't think you should get into a relationship unless you love someone. You shouldn't start a relationship and hope love comes later. So that's why I feel open dating is best starting out and if love unfolds, that's when you cut off the other girls and be exclusive with the one you love. Obviously that's if she wants the same thing as well and it makes sense to do so.

What you don't do is meet a girl, make her your girlfriend right away. Then a few months later realize you want more variety and discuss making your relationship an open relationship. That's a bad idea lol.

simplestchic · Answer

Being in one myself, I can tell you it takes a lot of trust and communication. They are not for everyone and I don't judge those that are monogamous. Jealousy is natural. I'm not wired much for jealousy, and I have a very adventurous libido, so open is the only kind of relationship I can have, unless I want to be a cheater (which I used to be).

Anonymous · Answer

I'm actually in a type of open relationship.
It works for us. It doesn't for everyone and I will be the first one to admit this isn't for everyone.
It takes very secure and confident people to do what we do, not just personally but in the relationship as well.
My boyfriend knows he's the only one for me romantically and emotionally. Physically is another story. And I assure you it's not because I "can't keep it in my pants", as someone else suggested. I have been monogamous and would be again if tomorrow he said he wants it all to stop. I wouldn't have a problem with it.
Are you and your boyfriend considering this or were you just discussing it for giggles?

Oram52 · Answer

I have no problem with Open Relationships, its not my business what kind of relationship other people are in. Personally I have absolutely no interest in ORs. I don't know anyone in real life involved in OR, so my experience is just from online.

So far I've not heard of any successful OR, they eventually end. Its usually guys who want OR but once reality kicks in they realize its easier for her to get guys near impossible for him. Not surprisngly relationship suffers and ends.

It seems they just want fuck buddies they are close to and have kids with.

UltraGamer · Answer

I've always thought about it every now and then but never got the chance to have one. I'd be comfortable with an open relationship that has me, my current girlfriend and either a boyfriend or a girlfriend I don't really mind it being a guy/girl if he/she is like a best friend to both my girlfriend and I before we have an open relationship with them. Plus the way I see it is that if us 3 share and be equal to each other then we won't have any issues. No one sidedness like say everyone has a job and provides an equal part.

I slightly rather it be a girl than a guy due to how awkward sex may be. Mainly since anytime we talk about threesomes its with her girl best friend

lostnparadox247 · Answer

I would personally never be in an open relationship. But I don't judge others that do it. If that's what they both want and it makes them both happy, then I say why not.

SarahsSummer · Answer

I have a couple froends in open relationships and it seems to work for them so far but I think it's tricky and can be kind of like walking on a tightrope.

Anonymous · Answer

To be honest I think society and societal standards aren't ready for this... YET! But believe me in maybe 100 years it will be considered as norm! I would not like to share, however i do see the point people that are willing to have this arrangement make!
Simply because when you really love and trust someone, sex should not matter THAT much! Ok there is jealousy and the fear of diseases etc... but isn't jealousy a form of.. i trust you but not 1000%? Or the point of being too selfish to consider someone else's need? I think there is a lid to every pot, so some people may never agree to rhis, such as me, but by logics it would make sense. To spice up the relationship or to satisfy someone's fantasies without having to break up with a good person just to lice a fantasy and then realise they've made a mistake. Plus remember, we are all mammals at the end of the day, and mammals aren't really known to be monogamous... 😊

Anonymous · Answer

Bad Idea if you're in love.
There will be one time when you will be angry with each other for other reason and will blew up this topic and
will feel hurt and much things.
I don't even like when my girl says that she has seen dicks on internet.
I mean I feel hurt why the hell you're looking at dick on internet when I got one for you.

In open relationship you both will feel when you will make love
that something is missing cause there is always someone better in making love than your partner.
so hell to the open relationship.
Why fuck somebody else when you got your hoe or your playboy.

Yumenai · Answer

Depends on the couple. If both agree to have one and it's only sex and no emotional connection then it works fine. But if one of them is just agreeing with this purely because they want to please or keep the partner, I think it's a very bad idea and they are going to get hurt in the end.

godfatherfan · Answer

IT IS CALLED BEING SINGLE.
Why people call them Open relationships is just absurd. They are not a relationship, it is simply being single. You don't care for the person or you wouldn't want them with someone else. Basically it is a glorified fuck buddy.

valerietyne · Answer

I've seen it go both ways. Most couples can't handle open relationships; something in our brains just isn't wired for it. However, I HAVE seen some folks in open relationships who have an incredibly healthy bond, and from what they've said, it's all about trust and communication. If you lose track of either of those things, folks get jealous or resentful, and it just ends in disaster.

One of those "tread carefully, but it's not impossible" sort of things.

Anonymous · Answer

When I'm in a relationship I care and love with all my heart and I give that guy my everything so I don't think that would work for me. If my boyfriend ever even asked my heart would be crushed. I can't imagine him sleeping with other women, what we do in bed is for us only. I wouldn't want him naked with anyone else spreading his juices on anyone else or some girls juices on him or even her sweat. I don't know to me sex is special even when it's kinky af I could never share that experience with someone else when I'm already in a relationship.

kenworth · Answer

well if your boyfriend and you are only For buddies. then go for it. but drop the boyfriend title. because that's not what he is to you if your willing to sleep with any guy that blows your way. and how are you going to feel when. another girl comes over to screw him. just remember what Snoopy has to say. The Grass Is Always Grenier On The Otherwise Side Of The Fence. Until You Get There ND Find Out Its Artifical Turff

Malik00 · Answer

Honestly I think open relationships are more realistic these days or at least having that option on the table. Monogamous relationships are nice, but in my opinion way too naive, If its gonna happen anyway might as well have it all up in the air.

Point I'm trying to make it, Even if you do like someone on an emotional level, there is always gonna be the chance that one of the 2 parties is gonna go unfulfilled sexually. So you might as well leave that door open there are no surprises.

To put it simply... I love you, but when i hear you say things like "I only wanna have sex with you" I can't help but laugh a little inside.

fabulouspancakes · Answer

I think they are a good option for some people, but not for everyone. I personally think they'd be best when a couple has been married/together for a while (I'm talking at least several years), don't have that intense jealousy anymore, feel connected to their partner on a deeper level than just sex, and maybe are a little bored with their sex life. Or, for people who never wanted to be monogamous to start with.

Anonymous · Answer

I don't understand when people say "you need a lot of trust and sense of security" to be in open relationship.
What trust? You're already being cheated left and right with your own blessing. Do you think rules really apply?
Sense of security, I guess you will be okay with anything as long as you have money and status.

It's like living in a harem, except females can screw other guys too.
Oh, the happiness.

AynonOMouse · Answer

If two people actually loved each other for real they would never consider sharing their partner.

JSmith925 · Answer

The picture should show this couple fighting and throwing things. That's where it ends up for most emotionally involved couples. in my experience, the couples who make this work have a relationship of convenience.
~JSmith

Kreneman · Answer

You both can do whatever you want but at the same that is a bad idea especially where feelings can get hurt, pregnancy can happen with the wrong person, and diseases can take place. Even if your cautious its still cheating that is not a relationship ( You may call it a group or multiple friends with benefits).

LatinaSquirrel · Answer

Both need to be very secure about themselves, both need to be veeery sure that is what they want. Otherwhise it will be very complicated.
Also if it is a very serious relationship, like a marriage, I don't think is a great idea. Since isn't a perfect enviroment if you looking to build a familly.
But in the end, if it is what is wanted, you guys are adults and free to do what your heart desires :)

Queen_naki5 · Answer

I feel that it's something that works well if the couple has spent a significant amount of time with each other being monogamous for several years and feeling like they wanna try other things but still remain in a relationship. This sounds like something that a couple married for 20+ years would do.

Astoriana · Answer

It's not for me. If it works for some people, great, but I know I wouldn't be good for me.

I would also appreciate if couples looking for extra partners on online dating sites paid attention to the "strictly monogamous" option. That means very explicitly that I do NOT want to be part of an open relationship.

sodaa_popp · Answer

From what I've witnessed of friends who opt to say, "I'm in an open relationship," they really mean to say one or a combination of a few things:

1) "I have a friends-with-benefits situation, but I really don't want to be judged."

2) "I feel there's a chance someone better may come along eventually, and this way I have a guilt-free way out if I want to leave."

3) "I don't want to commit, but at the same time I also don't like to feel lonely."

TsundereMatrix · Answer

I don't care if others are into it. I can't be. I'll be in constant fear that my SO would find someone better and then dump me because I gave them a reason to. Also I think couples that don't make their relationship exclusive are basically in an open relationship.

hahahmm · Answer

The fantasy is nice but when I think a woman is a good catch/I'm in love I would not want to risk losing her over it (if something went wrong).

So I doubt I would ever do it unless we were happily married for years & had 100% trust in each other. Plus she would have to be the kind of person who seldom has regrets about decisions they make.

madhatters4 · Answer

wouldn't work for me personally but if people can do it then that's on them. for me i can't stomach the idea of my partner being with anyone else and for me i have no desire to be with anyone else. to be with anyone else for would require not just physical attraction but a close emotional relationship

ai_regime · Answer

it all depends on the couple. for an open relationship to work, both have to agree on spicific rules set ahead of time and there must be constant communication with each other. rules must be implemented so one person does not do something that would anger the other person.

the people you both decide to bring into your relationship must also be aware that you two are a couple and are in an open relationship. there can't be secrets. also, these people have to feel comfortable, be aware of any rules set, and not be jealous of you both.

lastly, whoever you or him decide to bring into the relationship must be liked by the other person. last thing you would want is him bringing someone else home that you dislike. that is recipe for disaster.

Spykz · Answer

Honestly, it's all up to the boundaries that you and you partner set. Personally, I'm not into open relationships but I follow people who practice polygamy and they are living life happily.

If this is something you two want to try, great! As long as you both are comfortable, that's all that matters.

Lancaster4201 · Answer

In theory it's fine if everyone can keep their emotions in check, boundaries are made and respected, and communication is maintained.

In practice, I feel like it can work but it introduce a lot of complications that are likely to cause a relationship to fizzle out or implode.

Jack489109 · Answer

Don't think it would work unless they were both there like swinging. Most of the couples I know I met that do this and are happy are in their late 40s or 50s. My theory is that the longer you've been married the more motivated you are to sleep with someone other than your wife and the less you would care about her sleeping with someone else.

WalterRadio · Answer

It depends on the individuals entirely.

The key is that each must be very secure in their relationship, meaning they don't get jealous.

Very few humans are monogamous. Unfortunately, some long dead pope imposed his view of sexual morality (strange for a guy who isn't supposed to have sex) and that view has contaminated cultures across the globe and resulted in hundreds of millions of unhappy couples.

Jaded5990 · Answer

I think it can be a good idea, depending on the individuals who are actually in the relationship. if they for example get bored easily, if they can separate sex and emotion, and their views towards open relationships in general. Me personally, I think this is a good idea. I think the temptation of 'cheating' disappears and the people in the relationship can experience somebody new once in awhile

Browneye57 · Answer

Bad idea. I never works out for long. One or the other always bails.
Same for threesomes - they're never quite what you expect and someone always gets their feelings hurt. Usually the primary relationship fails as well.

Robsinsf53 · Answer

As long as neither one of you care if you're not with the other then go for it. I've never done none of this but, I know people who lost what is supposed to be the love of their life?(HOW) Threesomes, open relation - ships etc. lead more times then not to separation and/or divorce. The main culprit? Jealousy.

404filenotfound · Answer

It depends on your relationship, I guess. Personally, I wouldn't recommend it if you're serious about your relationship and/or in love.

I've reached the point in my life where I think that most of those "urges" are based in fear and insecurity, and acting on them just sort of reaffirms those fears and insecurities.

BarbaraP · Answer

Not my thing. If you can date other people, it means we're not together. Besides the drama, what's the point seriously? If you wanna play around than you might as well just be single. It really just kills the whole point of being in a relationship

Anonymous · Answer

I personally think it's a free pass to cheat on someone. a relationship to me is about finding your forever person and if you or your partner are focused on someone else then it's never going to have that intimacy it requires.
I considered being the "other" woman for a guy in one and his girlfriend might have murdered because because despite her suggesting the relationship she's very clingy and jealous. plus everyone gets emotionally invested to an extent and then we have a problem.

cth96190 · Answer

It is a bad idea. If you become pregnant, that will lead to a world of complications. If an STD is contracted by either of you, there could be life changing (or life ending) consequences. You are either in a relationship, or you are not. Both of you need to decide what you want. You should look past your desire for short-term sexual gratification.

genericname85 · Answer

super bad idea. if he tries to talk you into it, reject it. this bullshit never works and you will have drame with it. it´s just a way for people to cheap out of commitment and responsibility. you can have casual sex or a fuck friend but don´t be like "yeah we are kind of together but we still fuck whoever". that won´t work for you.

Angel_Kat · Answer

Good if both people in the relationship are very mentally stable and mature. If you're both really stable and want to, then why not  Bad if one or both of people from the relationship are prone to jealousy, mental instability, immaturity, etc. I can be all of these things I mentioned so yeah I can never handle being in an open relationship

Vanjasper · Answer

Unless both of you are 100% committed to each other, will feel no jealously, will allow the other to have their flings and be happy about it, open relationships will never work. This is not for everyone. Most open relationships come from a swinging background.

slutsdontgetoral · Answer

If we were meant to fuck whomever whenever please explain the existence of STDs. Condoms only prevent a handful. Unless you use one of these do you really want to kiss your husband after he eats another woman's pussy? I look at promiscuous people like toxic waste dumps.

Anonymous · Answer

I would never do it but one of my closest friends did. He deeply regretted it he had the idea that someday they were gonna marry and become a real couple but in the end his heart was broken. She found someone else and I don't blame her. Although I feel sorry for him what was he waiting for...

RationalMale · Answer

Open relationship is no different from friends with benefits.

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