@CanadianNinja idc what you think, if you feel like it is okay to restrict another grown ass human being there is something wrong with YOU. Stop shaming women that like to go out, smh.
Honey, you need enjoy your life! If he says you can't go some where then don't listen u live ur life. If your the type that likes to go out and have fun and he doesn't, I personally think it's gonna involve a lot of conflict But try asking him to tag along?
He will never change the way he thinks bealieve me. Or u let him control u (wich shouldn't be an option) or u end things with him and find someone who be in ur same direction.
1
0 Reply
Anonymous
(25-29)
+1 y
It depends on the situation, I for one can understand why he would be reluctant of letting you go to the club with your girlfriend. Nowadays it's pretty dangerous, I'm guessing you're attractive and there are a lot of people out there who aren't afraid to drug you or take advantage. Believe me I thought oh it would never happen around here until it did to my sister. I don't like my girlfriend going to clubs without me now and she completely understands but I let her do anything else she wants. So if he's controlling who your talking to or more stiff in your life then yea you guys aren't right but he's also just being protective in a good way if it's just clubs
0
0 Reply
Anonymous
(45 Plus)
+1 y
It doesn't matter that you allegedly go to clubs to dance with all of your friends, 99% of guys go to clubs to get with girls. The club scene is rotten anyway, but if you want to keep on spending time in energy like that, it means you probably aren't ready for a relationship anyway.
It sounds like he is insecure. I wouldn’t say you should just drop him but he has to learn to deal with his issues. Maybe you could have a serious conversation and tell him that you will go out with your friends and you do not like to be threatened and there is nothing to worry about. Maybe he has had some bad experience in the past? The best thing to do is communicate a lot about it and if he isn’t willing to work with you than you should consider leaving.
i frankly think he is being overly controlling. i don't think you should be in a relationship with a person who treats you like an object rather than respects you as a human
It seems the answer is already in the question when you said “ i’m wondering if i even want to be with someone who thinks they can tell me what i can or cannot do”. So make a choice. In my opinion his action is childish and you’re 100% right.
I'm 19 and have never been to clubs. Neither do I ever wish to go there. Bars are a different story, however I think. You both are clearly on a different page, especially if he threatened breakup. I guess you should find someone else.
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0 Reply
Anonymous
(30-35)
+1 y
You are not ready for a relationship... couples even ask permission to each other to hang out until a certain time, yes it's true. What do you mean have fun you can have fun with other activities too. Clubing is not that fun to have a debate with your boyfriend unless you don't take him seriously actually your boyfriend is gentle not breaking up with you yet! You are not matured yet so make him a favor and break up And then go have fun
Ditch him. Don't let yourself become bitter because of your boyfriend's jealousy and lack of trust. If he disagrees with you, fair enough but if he gives you ultimatums like that, call him out and break up with him.
It's a tough call because mixing alcohol and clubbing can lead to trouble. I've seen it happen. You should go out and have fun though. You're young. This is on you. he's not gonna change. Are you gonna keep not doing what you want because he doesn't want you to?
0
0 Reply
Anonymous
(45 Plus)
+1 y
Yeah, I don't hang with controlling men like that. Hopefully you don't live with him. If men are afraid of what other men will do, they need to work that out between themselves.
I've been way too long in a relationship where a guy threatened me to break uo if i do this oder that. Its absolutely not okay to threaten in an relationship, even more with a breakup. U should ask yourself if he would do that if he'd truly love u
It’s simple. Either do it his way or dump him. Not all guys would have a problem with you going out with your friends. Although if the guy isn’t clubbing then he should not be with someone who goes out a LOT. He does not trust you.
He's got to learn to deal with it. If you cut out a part of your life for him, it will just lead to resentment in the long run and neither of you will be happy. Can he not come along to dance? Or maybe if he got to know your friends better and felt like they liked him, he'd trust them to keep guys with intentions in check.
Me personally? I won't date women who go to clubs. Quit doing that at age 24. It makes me uncomfortable. If we go together, I don't like it but I can live with it. My thought was, if thats your idea of a good time then we got nothing in common.
2
1 Reply
Asker
+1 y
I'm only 22. I asked him to suggest other places I can go to dance and have a good time.
What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
99Opinion
Tbh if someone even said “i don’t want you going to clubs because there are guys there” i wouldda haules my ass straight out the door.
Good, because that guy doesn't want a hoe
@CanadianNinja idc what you think, if you feel like it is okay to restrict another grown ass human being there is something wrong with YOU. Stop shaming women that like to go out, smh.
Honey, you need enjoy your life! If he says you can't go some where then don't listen u live ur life. If your the type that likes to go out and have fun and he doesn't, I personally think it's gonna involve a lot of conflict
But try asking him to tag along?
Just tell him " too bad cupcake, I'm going out"
You just need to break up with him. No one in a relationship should give an ultimatum just because you want to have fun in life
He will never change the way he thinks bealieve me. Or u let him control u (wich shouldn't be an option) or u end things with him and find someone who be in ur same direction.
It depends on the situation, I for one can understand why he would be reluctant of letting you go to the club with your girlfriend. Nowadays it's pretty dangerous, I'm guessing you're attractive and there are a lot of people out there who aren't afraid to drug you or take advantage. Believe me I thought oh it would never happen around here until it did to my sister. I don't like my girlfriend going to clubs without me now and she completely understands but I let her do anything else she wants. So if he's controlling who your talking to or more stiff in your life then yea you guys aren't right but he's also just being protective in a good way if it's just clubs
It doesn't matter that you allegedly go to clubs to dance with all of your friends, 99% of guys go to clubs to get with girls. The club scene is rotten anyway, but if you want to keep on spending time in energy like that, it means you probably aren't ready for a relationship anyway.
It sounds like he is insecure. I wouldn’t say you should just drop him but he has to learn to deal with his issues. Maybe you could have a serious conversation and tell him that you will go out with your friends and you do not like to be threatened and there is nothing to worry about. Maybe he has had some bad experience in the past? The best thing to do is communicate a lot about it and if he isn’t willing to work with you than you should consider leaving.
i frankly think he is being overly controlling. i don't think you should be in a relationship with a person who treats you like an object rather than respects you as a human
You dump his ass, really simple. Don't let people control you like that and if someone threatens to break up over this then they aren't worth keeping.
It seems the answer is already in the question when you said “ i’m wondering if i even want to be with someone who thinks they can tell me what i can or cannot do”. So make a choice. In my opinion his action is childish and you’re 100% right.
I'm 19 and have never been to clubs. Neither do I ever wish to go there. Bars are a different story, however I think. You both are clearly on a different page, especially if he threatened breakup. I guess you should find someone else.
You are not ready for a relationship... couples even ask permission to each other to hang out until a certain time, yes it's true.
What do you mean have fun you can have fun with other activities too. Clubing is not that fun to have a debate with your boyfriend unless you don't take him seriously
actually your boyfriend is gentle not breaking up with you yet!
You are not matured yet so make him a favor and break up And then go have fun
Break up with him. He deserves better than a club slut.
Don't even try to say you're not picking up guys. Anyone who's ever been to a club or known a club slut knows the truth.
Ditch him. Don't let yourself become bitter because of your boyfriend's jealousy and lack of trust. If he disagrees with you, fair enough but if he gives you ultimatums like that, call him out and break up with him.
It's a tough call because mixing alcohol and clubbing can lead to trouble. I've seen it happen. You should go out and have fun though. You're young. This is on you. he's not gonna change. Are you gonna keep not doing what you want because he doesn't want you to?
Yeah, I don't hang with controlling men like that. Hopefully you don't live with him. If men are afraid of what other men will do, they need to work that out between themselves.
I've been way too long in a relationship where a guy threatened me to break uo if i do this oder that. Its absolutely not okay to threaten in an relationship, even more with a breakup. U should ask yourself if he would do that if he'd truly love u
It’s simple. Either do it his way or dump him. Not all guys would have a problem with you going out with your friends. Although if the guy isn’t clubbing then he should not be with someone who goes out a LOT. He does not trust you.
And I bet you if you put a condition on anything he does he would laugh and say, ‘no’. That’s how controlling people are.
He's got to learn to deal with it. If you cut out a part of your life for him, it will just lead to resentment in the long run and neither of you will be happy.
Can he not come along to dance? Or maybe if he got to know your friends better and felt like they liked him, he'd trust them to keep guys with intentions in check.
Me personally? I won't date women who go to clubs. Quit doing that at age 24. It makes me uncomfortable. If we go together, I don't like it but I can live with it. My thought was, if thats your idea of a good time then we got nothing in common.
I'm only 22. I asked him to suggest other places I can go to dance and have a good time.