Checking out girls while in a relationship?

Okay so my boyfriend always stares at girls when he's with me or not, and when I mean stares I mean he STARES. So I recently said something to him about it and he told me he does look at girls and thing "damn nice booty"🙄. I told him I thought this was disrespectful but he told me all guys do it and it's normal, am I over reacting?

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Uh yes. Guys can look, but they could do it without you seeing them and in such an obvious way that hurts your feelings. THAT is disrespectful. It’s normal for men, and women to notice attractive people and look. But to stare? No. A little glance and that’s it is pretty much all he needs to be doing, and when you’re not around or watching him do it.

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What Guys Said 35

  • He's 100% right that it is normal. As long as he keeps it to himself and puts you first, doesn't let it distract him from you and is loyal. I don't see any reason for you to be concerned. I'm sure you'd look at a random guy who you found really attractive across the street too, but it's not like it means you want to cheat or anything and I'm sure your guy is the same.

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  • There are guys who DO NOT do it, I think it's disrespectful to give your attention to someone else while you're supposed to be dedicated to a girl. His admiration should be directed towards you and no other girl. If he checks out other girls and good grief even comments their assets to you, then why is he with you? If I'd behave like that, not only would it be disrespectful and show where my heart truly is, but it would show that I'm not 100% committed to my girl.

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  • You’re overreacting. I do it with mine and we’ve together for 5 years. There is always going to be a girl who looks better than you (and same for your boyfriend), being in a relationship doesn’t make people blind.

    Is he still with you? If yes, then that speaks volumes.

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  • "All guys do this" or similar lines are just way to justify something he just couldn't get any real good reason in his mind, if there even is one.

    Glancing can be autonomous biological thing but staring and commenting should be out of question.

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  • Nice scenery is simply that. Let it pass.

    If he actually tries to talk to these passerby, or continues to comment long after the person has passed, then yes, there is a problem with him.

    However, if YOU continue to comment about this long after the person has passed, then yes, there is a problem with YOU.

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  • Guess so, especially if he knows that you knows and gives no other bad signals, if you know what I mean.
    PragerUniversity did a great video about it on YouTube and I couldn't agree more on it, check it out.

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  • It’s disrespectful to be so overt about it, and additionally so to comment. The worst of it though, for me, is that you have specifically asked him not to stare as a matter of respect, and his response was to say that he sees nothing wrong with what he’s doing and will keep doing it in spite of your feelings on it.

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  • No all guys do this when they are by then self or with friends some guys may think it if they happen to glance someone but not stare when they are with there partner can be openly staring at women when you with your girl that's badmind

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  • That's just inappropriate and wrong especially if he's with someone so beautiful like yourself... yeah I saw your profile pic lol sounds like he's just a asshole for having a perfectly gorgeous woman in front of him and staring at another.

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  • Its disrespectful if he doesn't try to not do it infront of you.
    All men have the instinct to look at women, its just how we are wired.
    But if we are with a girl, we should try not to.
    I hope girls will forgive it if i accidentally do it 😅.

    But him not even trying to , is a bit lame

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  • We are created to find potential mates for reproduction. This includes eyeing at girls no matter your relationship status. It's hardwired into us, we can fight it but it's inevitable. Doesn't mean he would ever cheat on you.

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  • If you're going to stare. DON'T DO IT WITH YOUR GIRL AROUND.

    Yes it's disrespectful to do it in front of you.

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  • It's biological we're attracted to beauty regardless if whether or not one is in a relationship. Guys and women respectively WILL stare at other good looking people. We're all culprits of the act and it's natural.

    You've starred at good looking guys too right?

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  • We all do this. And nothing will change that. You might think it's disrespectful, but he's not doing it to disrespect you. We're just hardwired that way.

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  • Its normal behaviour, but is dissrespectfull when obvious. He should work on making you feel like the best thing ever, and he might stare, but he should then say something like "I'm just appreciating how lucky i am" etc

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  • uh okay, I'd never do that with my girl. I literally hate staring girls but even if I were a stalker, I wouldn't do it at least infront of her

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  • When you are out he needs to show you the upmost respect. Looking at other ladies is not bad but should not be so noticeable that you have to question him about it.

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  • There is an old saying "You can read the menu but just don't order anything" and there is nothing wrong with him staring at other girls especially if they really have a nice set of Tit's or a great Ass as long as he is only looking and nothing more. It is a natural human male reaction to when a man see's a hot and sexy woman he is going to look.

    Now ask yourself this question. Say you are out with him and he starts staring at different men and says to you, "Hey look check out the pecker on this guy!!!". I do not think you would like that at all.

    If he is only looking he is doing nothing wrong but the minute he goes to bed and starts banging any of them then there is a problem for sure.

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  • Noticing is human staring is wrong if you stare with sexual intent it's cheating

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  • I'm not agree with him because all men doesn't do the same, everyone have their own beliefs. all depends on culture and his needs/ beliefs.

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  • It's normal thing for a guy to do even when a relationship but still it's disrespectful if he does it when he's with you

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    • I'd say it's not a lack of respect, but feeling okay with it. We lack info to tell for sure, I guess.

    • I mean, being aware that she knows and not hiding it, don't minding it.

  • U would of left him in my position not the kind of person you want to be with

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  • no, he is being disrespectful. it seems he is very very immature

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  • He like your body not you as person with heart , when he finds other beautiful body he'll let you, remember these words

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  • If he's checking out other women, he's being disrespectful. End of story.

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  • Men are visual and like to look at the ladies. It is no big deal.

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  • I don't think you're overreacting at all.

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  • baddd

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  • He's a loser

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  • You soft, he want a hot chick

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What Girls Said 6

  • Glancing on the way by is one thing, but blatant staring is disrespectful to you. No, he shouldn't do it if he is serious about you. The fact that he does makes me think he isn't very committed to what you have.

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  • No your not, when your with you have a girlfriend your only suppose to have eyes for her and no one else. If a girl walks by with a big booty he better act like it's freaking invisible, its called self control. That is cheating with your yes, yes it's real. Not all guys do this. I bet your boyfriend would get really mad if for a whole day you stare at men with no shirts on, looking at their abs. How come boys can stare at girls butts, but girls can't stare a another guys chest. Some guys look and then stop looking, they're human they make mistakes, but staring really... I would break up with his dumb ass, and say go get that chick who ass you were just drooling over.

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    • Woah woah woah
      1. Staring ~ cheating?
      2. Speculating on her boyfriend. It's not bad, but it's just a speculation
      3. What do you mean by "can"?
      4. Butts=/= chest. Ever seen a guy getting mad for girl looking at a chest?

  • It’s normal, though it’s not right if he’s constantly doing it when he’s with you.

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  • I get why it's hard, but yes. They either do it openly or secretively

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  • Not all guys do it, he is lying.

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  • *life.. Was said

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