If yes! What are your standards?
What makes a guy want to be in a relationship?
If yes! What are your standards?
These aren't dealbreakers, but here are some of my ideal traits:
Wants marriage in the future and is monogamous
Fair skin
Short (~5'6")
Cute feet
Blue or green eyes (not really that important)
Red or blonde hair (not really that important)
At least somewhat intelligent
Reads
Doesn't mind B&W movies or movies with subtitles
Fit physique (or average with some curves)
Spiritual (but not overly religious)
Likes to dress up sometimes for dates
Sexually assertive
Honest
Loyal
Has integrity
Playful and flirty (sometimes)
Down-to-earth, but has a girly streak
Some geeky hobbies (anime, video games, fantasy novels, etc.)
Likes to drink (and get drunk on occasion)
Not a picky eater (like variety)
Good cook (or just decent is fine)
Enjoys nature and history
Affectionate and likes to cuddle
Likes horror movies and metal music
Communicates her wants and needs (no mind games)
Independent and responsible
Humble and kind
Ambitious, at least enough to keep improving in life
Supportive
Loves me unconditionally (doesn't try to change me)
Doesn't have children (ideally, but am open to single mothers)
BUT wants children (important to me)
Mid 20s to late 30s
Emotionally mature
Goofy sense of humor
Great kisser
Gives good head
___________________ (Next are qualities I don't want)
Hard drug use (maybe the occasional joint)
Lazy
Bad teeth and poor hygiene
Doesn't take care of her appearance
Bad attitude or overly sarcastic (snarky/negative)
Too passive sexually
Doesn't trim her pubic hair or shave her legs
Vegan (probably wouldn't be compatible)
Smoker who doesn't have aspirations to quit
Complete teetotaller (unless she has goals like me)
Too girly (selfie fiend, image-obsessed, etc.)
Apathetic and doesn't respond to contact
Racism and gossiping
Expects me to read her mind
Nosey friends who start drama
Too liberal
Tons of debt and/or financially insecure
Cheater or has a cheating history
Doesn't want kids and/or low libido
Too submissive (no opinions)
Flirts with other guys
Overly critical or vindictive
Abusive or controlling (bossy)
Lives too far away
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Although I may have a few more here and there I may have missed, those are the major ones. They don't ALL have to be ticked, but I don't find them too unreasonable either.
Geez man. Send it to santa claus
@meee0 What? A man has to have standards. š
It is really sad when guys don't conceptualize what they want their partner to be like. All too often guys will go for whoever gives them the time of day. I'd suggest actually coming up with a list of ideal traits you want in a partner and to visualize that person. A man should have his boundaries and his standards.
"Is there specific things that guys look for in a girl?" I answered the question. hah!
Great lol exactly meš
@Hannah31st Lies. haha!
@Hannah31st Your age for one. Besides that, if you have most of them, you are goodie.
Well except being blue or green eyes and red or blond hair, I am sure I have all those traits.. well, yeah u can call me goodie or innocent or plain or whatever but thatās what I am and I plan to keep it for my future husband.. thanks
Lol couldn't stop laughing
@Hannah31st no what I mean by "goodie" is you are good, as in, you got it covered.
@bitterguard I am glad I could entertain you buddy.
I definitely look for a woman, not a girl. A wouldn't date a girl that is insecure, childish (and not in a good way), overly jealous, without goals or passions in life, negative and pessimistic or always looking for and spreading rumors, waiting on a man to "be whole" or "become rich" or "be happy". Instead I would be head over heels for a woman that have self esteem (of course we all are insecure about some things, that's fine), mature, has her life put together, has goals, passions, can trust me without always tracking me, where I've been and with who and instead do things on her own that she enjoys. In clear, someone that is perfectly happy alone, and doesn't need me, but chose to let me be a part of her life because she likes me
Amazingly said!
The best man is not demanding and just loves her the way she is. That is the best basics for a relationsship. Also a man that does not depend on opinions of others and will do nothing for it is absolutely great. Most man hide they live in boundage. That is so evil and never good for a relationsship and boundage is created to destroy relationsships for people who are jealous if you have a good relationsship and promise you a lot what is not ment for good purpose but you must believe that and many are fooled with that. But be aware, some woman live in boundage not just man. So the same is also true for the opposit sex. Check always if your partner has demons. If so it most confess it that does not confess no relationsship is possible that ever will be good and make no hope but it will bring you down in hell and you must believe it is done for love while it is pure evil and hate. This happens a lot in our society. Almost everybody is possessed since birth and the devil works extremely hard , so have no shame for that since you are not the only one in boundage. Just get rid of it if you are able to do it and have a good relationsship because the bible says that is important , live good to make other jealous. The most live evil and make other jealous what is the opposit of Gods will desire. Be aware and wake up and open your eyes for evil.
For me. I look for a person to get along with me. Someone funny. Someone taller than me too. Sometimes the person doesn't have to be funny, I just need to enjoy my time with them. Someone understanding, kind and caring... and not only for me but others around me. Someone who loves me for me. A guy who doesn't want me for my body. Basically a guy who is like my best friend as well.
and looks wise
I relly don't mind what race I forever end up with but I mostly prefer any other race than my own (long story but if u ask I'll be more than happy to explain). Gorgeous eyes can attract me. I don't mind if the guys a little bit chubby coz frankly i don't entirely mind body types. Lol my boy can't be having small lips coz like my lips are relly big and if a boy has small lips... i don't even wanna imagine what would happen. I'm not sure if i like dudes with long hair but a cute short haircut would be nice. I also like nice curls like Finn Wolfhard's but i relly don't care.
Pretty much it hehe
If you asked Santa for all of this am very sure he will quit his job
@Arabian911 lol
This is not the best question to ask because you are going to end up with the wrong kind of person. First evaluate your standards and values. Then ask this from somebody who your interested with. But as I always day, start out as friends first while stating your intentions. Then see if romance is possible. Every person has different standards. And you don't want to get involved with somebody who's standards conflicts your own.
fuck these standards all these guys are talking about. be yourself and the right guy will fall for you. bottom line is the perfect girl could be infant of a guys face and if he's not ready to settle and still wants to "make memories" then thats that
@Names93 the point of the matter is none of these traits should matter to any girls at all because by saying this girls are going to get the wrong idea of trying to be something they're not and i actually haven't read any of the traits any of the guys listed the point of my post is to stop worrying about what gets guys attention, focus on yourself and the right guy will like you for who you are and not who you're trying to become. in addition to that, I'm saying no specific traits are going to make a guy want to be with a girl for a lifetime if they're simply not ready to commit to one girl. if you look at the OP age its 18-24 and if they're towards the younger range in that the truth is that most guys that age don't want to settle down with one girl yet, not implying that to all men.
@Op if you believe that good for you its your opinion... however that works if you are truly a catch a girl who is naturally great... as for the majority of girls today if they ignore guys standards and go around doing whatever they want sooner or later the consequences will hit them... like it or not decent people have standards and the only way to be with such people is to fit their standard
@confised_dater Sure, but also read this bit of OP:
" What are your standards?"
They're merely answering that question. So no, don't fuck what these guys have to say, they're merely expressing their own standards.
also if you've not read the traits, how can you say "fuck all the standards these guys are talking about" you've literally just confessed you don't even know why standards these guys are talking about. You could be telling girls not to worry about being good people.
Opinion
173Opinion
In a nutshell, he has to feel that he has The One. If he wants kids, he wants to be confident that she would be a good mother. Mutual physical and emotional attraction, shared values/philosophy, enjoying each other's company. Trust, compatibility, stability.
I see this question over and over, and it's based on a basic misunderstanding. It is NOT some superior quality in a girl that makes her "dating material" instead of "ONS material." A guy who's looking for one-night-stands, looks at ALL girls as ONS. A guy that looking for "dating material" is looking at girls as potential dates. It is the qualities inside the GUY, not of the the girl, that makes the difference.
It *is* true that a girl can, through her actions, prove to a guy looking to date, that she is NOT dating material, but that does not mean that she can prove through her actions that she *is* dating material to a guy who's not looking to date.
If you have trouble understanding the difference think of this analogy.
There are two girls, each running a food stall. One girl is selling full meals. The other sells snacks.
Two guys come along. One guy is hungry and looking for a meal. The other isn't particularly hungry, and just wants a snack.
What can the "full meal" girl do to make the "snack guy" eat a full meal? NOTHING. If she lowers her prices *enough*, he'll buy the "full meal" instead of the snack, BUT he's not going to eat the "full meal" he'll just snack on it and throw the rest away.
On the other hand, the guy who's looking for a "full meal" will buy lots of snacks to make a "full meal" if the snack girl offers them.
In the beggining of this year, all I wanted for a girl was to engage physically then hit it.
I met a girl from another city on the beach, I told her I was going to be there for my birthday because I love the beach.
She said the following: Ok, so we'll make a barbecue for yoi in my house to celebrate your birthday properly.
I didn't believe it, but when I got there, there was lots of meat and a bottle of whiskey waiting for me.
I immediately putted her out of the "commitmentless zone" and saw potential.
On our second date I said I was going to bring cold beer for us to watch the sunset and she said the following: "I will bring a thermical bag so our beers dont warm up". Another point for her.
We went out for a while and she turned out to be a very good cooker as well.
She also has a very open mind in sex and seems to enjoy it.
Sadly she is not very... Cutey... Like giving affection with words or something like that, but I think she thinks I dont like it.
The point is: She cares about it. She foresees what could make a person happy instead of trying to make me chase her.
I would happy commit to that girl, but my standards are too high since I am not 100% over my ex yet.
But she clearly is the one who got closer, because she is altruistic.
Alright I will be super honest. Most guys want a girl just to have one. They aren't think about anything way into the future. They want just to have a girlfriend so they can do relationship stuff.
So what do most guys look for;
-Down to earth ( she isn't judgemental)
-Nice
-Friendly and outgoing
-Cute
-girls that aren't like omg eww for little things
-fun ( this is so huge so many people are not fun)
-caring
-Shows interesting in what you think and how you feel
- Girl that isn't afraid to be all flirty and do smexy stuff :3
That's all I can think of off the top of my head
For me, I want to wait for marriage so dating is only a long term thing for me. Things I would want to see are character traits, goals, mindset, beliefs, and looks. Looks are subjective and every guy has their own preferences so I won't touch on looks.
Character Traits: Kind, Genuine, Intelligent, down to Earth, Humble, Strong willed, fun
Goals: Wants kids, wants to better themselves, whatever else
Mindset: Non-materialistic or just doesn't buy things we don't need, and can know when to take things seriously and when to mess around, can take a joke
Beliefs: Christian
It all starts with physical attraction followed by personality traits. I´m looking for traits like positivity, sense of humour, loyal and reliable, kind hearted etc. In the past I would fall for the wrong type of girls so those things are necessary for me to be attracted to a girl. Also what matters is how her childhood was, relationship with parents, friends and most of all, how much she cares for her own wellbeing.
If those things are in order, then it´s only how well the sex works between us and if she´s willing to try new things or not.
I mean, for me it's a mix of a couple things that make me feel like the girl is worth being with. If you get what I mean. Firstly I think it would be intelligence. Cause there's nothing worse than a person who has no sense of knowledge whatsoever. Then it's loyalty, and trustworthyness, due to some personal reasons. And have an own personality... oh and please have humour, you gotta have humour to get through this world. I know it's a long list. But that is what makes me feel like the person is someone who I can spend a lifetime with!
Good question, i have wondered this about girls too. I am a guy who is currently single. For me, what I am looking for in a girl is basically 1. Do our personalities mesh/ compliment each other. If you can't stand the person your dating/ married to, it doesn't matter how "good" that person is, everything they do will make you mad. 2. Are they intelligent enough to make wise choices if they need to on their own. I am more of a natural leader, so a natural follower would be my pair, but if I'm not there, I need to know that she can make solid choices by herself. And 3. Can she cook? I say "cook", but I am referring to general skills that compliment me. If I am obviously lacking in an area, it only makes sense to pick a partner who is obviously strong in that same area. In general, this is my thought process, I'm sorry I can't be more helpful, but I think it is more about how you "match up" with the perspective partner.
1. Motivation. Doesn't expect me to carry every conversation, make every move, always text first, always initiate intimacy, etc.
2. She has her own shit happening. Hobbies, a career, passions she chases after, goals, etc.
3. Able to hold a conversation. Been with too many girls that just nod and say yeah or stare blankly with no interest, this is absolutely necessary
4. Cares about her health and fitness.
Eats healthy from time to time and does something physical regularly. I love big girl as much as anyone but there is a difference between being big and not taking care of yourself
Well this might sound stupid but first of all I like girls that are girly.
I'm not interested in party girls that can drink more than me.
She should be cute in the way she acts (this can vary from girl to girl. What is cute by one doesn't have to be by another one)
She should share the same or similar kind of humor.
Despite the "character is way more important than looks" saying, looks are important as well. She can be the perfect match character wise but if I'm not physically attracted to her in any way it just won't work out.
And last but not least she should accept the existence of privacy. Sometimes I just wanna be alone without her going crazy about it.
I would like to be in a relationship to experience the other person, to feel loved and also be in love. To make loved one smile and happy and help them when they down. Have someone to share my life with more intimately.
They would definitely have to be opened minded and eager to see the world and absolutely have to have some brains to them. Oh and honest.
Thatās what I think anyway. I havenāt actually been in a relationship but I look forward to experiencing one when the person and time is right
If course. We are living, feeling, loving beings just like woman. My dream girl is the only girl in my dreams... I am the only one in her dream's, so we dream the same dream. She/I do NOT have a cheat in any of our dreams. No matter how long We are together I never say NO in the bedroom, she will never say NO to me, no matter how tired, how bad the headache is, how upset we may have been with one another that day... When my adorable sweet soul and I lose our clothes we talk until all misunderstanding is under stood. We stay up for a week if needed. Never enter the sleep state with unresolved resentments between your lover and yourself. Make full amends and then do the most sentuous thing she likes even if you hate going that. Now you are in love. If you love you have only one goal. Make her happy.
Then let the poor girl sleep.
She is not poor. I don't pick up stray dogs cause I feel sorry for them. I date women with confidence.
Yes Scorpio, and why not walk through the gates of heaven with her. No death due part.
The she is not poor is in error. It was 4 someone else, the app goofed up.
It's not the girl, it's they guy. Some guys are ready to settle down, some guys are not. The guys who aren't ready aren't going to change because of a girl. They will change when they are tired of dating. For some guys this will happen when they are 21. For others it won't ever happen.
Nothing makes a guy want a relationship. They fell lonely and needy and desperate just like women do. A guy will choose to spend his life with you when you change his perspective. When you affect a guy so much that he changes for the better, you'll have the guy that will love you forever.
It happened for me young. I like to fill around and just toyed with girls, but ever since I've met her she's three only person I want to be with.
I just left a 2 year relationship because she wouldn't do her share of house chores (lived together for year and a half), had no ambition to achieve any of her goals (trust me i tried boosting her up) and sex drive went to shit.
For the next girl, im looking for a willingness to put in the effort, keep things fair and balanced, strive for her own personal goals and not be afraid to be themselves
Using my wifiest female friends (they are married now) as reference to what makes men want a relationship
- they are mature
- they had life goals
- they were in an OK shape
- they look classy
- they can commit
- they are not a pain in the ass
As for my friends who can't keep a boyfriend
- they either dress like nuns or strippers
- they cancel appointments at the last minute
- not mature
- clingy
So if you want a relationship have traits from the first list. :)
lol mental picture nuns or stripper medium- glory
@Bombadillo didn't know which way to put it :)
HAHAHAH thatās a nice description š
it was well said āŗļø
Personally I would like a girl that I can connect with beyond the superficial level. A lot of people say that you should act like a friend, I can tell you now that this doesn't work most of the time. My advice would be find someone that you like and get on their wavelength. Find out what they like and take an interest, most importantly show to him that you are available / interested. I know it sounds a little old fashioned but that's because it is. Just be aware that you may have to make the first move, some guys aren't all that comfortable approaching especially if you are with friends. If he is with friends ask to borrow him for a moment and go somewhere quiet and away from everyone.
Best of luck, we're all rooting for you!
How sad that you think of girls in such black and white terms, and not fully human. Decent girls or sluts are your only categories? Define slur in your own words and explain why that is bad. Define decent.
You don't know anything about me and my sexual history isn't your business, just as yours is not mine.
I simply pointed out that relationship based on looks alone is superficial and will not last, because people are complex and deeper than their physical appearances.
Yet somehpw
I look for kindness, caring about others, intelligence, good sense of humor, good morals, thoughtfulness toward others, someone with goals that are compatible with mine, and willing to work for to reach those goals, faith belief close to mine, compassion for others, warm personality, loyal to her friends (but not stupidly loyal), nice to look at (a smile does that), good body is a plus, but not a deal breaker.
Depends on the guy. Some guys its sex. Others how independent they are. How well they bond. Some have a thing about good cooking. The saying is "The best way to a mans heart is his stomach." Me personally, a strong independent woman who is cute funny and smart.
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