Why is it erotic for a black woman to date a white man, but trashy for a white woman to date a black man?

[Anonymous]

I have a strong preferance for white men, ever since boys no longer had cooties. White men have been very sweet to me and not shy about asking me out.

A common thing is the arousal about my mocha skin tone, full lips, "strong" figure, and firm temperment. Likewise, I am very aroused by the vanilla skin, beautiful eyes, stature and relaxed temperment of white men.

Whats odd is that when with a white guy, people make comments about how hot sex must be, how "cultured" he is, and how wealthy I must now be, and spoiled by him.

Well... okay, the sex is FIRE, those white guys tend to be more culturally aware, they make various wages, and do lavish kinda heavy. So there's some truth.

But, when my blonde girlfriend is with a black dude, we hear stuff like she has degraded herself, slutty, only wants his penis, can't be a real family - Its kinda brutal.

What does it matter if her boyfriend is black?

My thoughts is that given the country's history, white men still have a kind of "royalty," about them, or stereotyped aristocratic stature, whereas black men are the opposite. So, to put it Disney, a black girl with a white man, has this Cinderella effect, whereas a white girl with a black guy, has connatations of Lady and the Tramp.

Do we subconciously still hold a race hierarchy?

Also, I think of a forbidden fruit tabooey. We used to be forced apart by law, but that doesn't stop attraction.

The couple that fought for inter-race marriage in 1967

Weird topic I know, but I asked because while we were on our group date night, two black guys high-fived my boyfriend for having me, then the older white couples and passerbys kept complimenting us together. Not so for my blonde friend, who usually gets dirty looks or jokes about him ruining her credit and leaving her kids fatherless. Black men are great partners too!

They ain't all Da'quan

Whats your intel?
Thanks!

[passinby]

From some personal experience and observations it seems that attractive black women go with attractive white guys typically and is a possible reason for your “erotic”. My black girlfriend is tall, thin, beautiful, and I seem to have the most fun with her but she is a rare down-to-earth type and her mind is as twisted as mine. She is also a rare friend to me. However, the feminists accuse me of “exotic” racism:
everydayfeminism.com/.../ .
So I suspect that you meant to say “exotic” something foreign and interesting rather than “erotic” something that causes sexual arousal.

So, I was out a few weeks ago, back in the states, and I saw two different white women black guy couples. What I noticed was that the women were kind of bitchy to them and one guy was going in and out of the place while the white woman sat on her ugly ass and bossed him around. It actually sucked to watch it; I felt like shyt actually watching this come down. I have seen this too many times and I just remembered one incident at a parts store where this white witch was chewing the shyt out of her black boyfriend or husband, poor guy. My opinion based on many observations is that white women that go with black men are intolerable to be with. “white men still have a kind of "royalty,"” I see it as the inverse that these white women (only referring to the ones I observed over the years) are insufferable for any human. I have never observed a mean black man with a sensitive defenseless white woman in person—this excludes the top tv trial of all times per all the coverage. That marriage I read somewhere was considered fairytale and possibly “exotic” in the romance phase. N&OJ

[dantetheexplorer]

That's easy.
Because in our society:
(1) white people are at the top of the totem pole when it comes to mate desirability
(2) women are thought to always "marry up".

A white man with a black girl is fine. Since white men are already at the top of the totem pole, they have no choice but to pair up with other people further down on the totem pole.

A white woman, while not being as high as a white man on the social totem pole, is usually directly beneath him - so that's pretty high up.

When she goes out with a black man - who is BELOW her on the social totem pole - people might be effectively thinking: "Why is she going out with someone who's below her on the social pyramid?" The thinking is, if women always "marry up", why is she "marrying down" ? There must be something wrong with her!

I'm not saying any of this is right.
But I've spoken to many interracial couples - and the flak they get usually come from people who belong at either the same "level" as the female partner, or higher.

Does that mean that applies to all interracial couples?
Obviously not.
But people who want you think we live in a world where racism doesn't exist, frankly, have their heads so far up their ass their eyeballs are touching their spleen.

[Asker]

Yes! Im glad someone else noticed too! It was a hunch I had, but of course people think these hints of racism dont exist in the 2000's. Its not on purpose, just a lingering effect from a post "totem pole" society.

Its really interesting that the white men aren't viewed lowly for "marrying down," well, other white people give them shit at times, but it really don't matter, because how do you tell someome at the "top," what they can or can not do in this regard? In a strange way for us, its like society justified it as a "cute, exotic," thing, while criticizing our counterpart.

Wow thats so crazy. The fact that a white woman would 'marry down,' just shows that it is pure attraction. People say its just sex or scrutinize their relationship, but you really have to love your partner to handle that.

[Pink2000]

Well I’ve seen both white men and women openly admit they only want black men and women for sex. They heard that black men have large peens and black some times have good 😸.

[watercolor_lions]

It isn't. I've seen both look classy and trashy. And I have seen trashy white couples. And classy white couples.

[Wulfila]

In my purely anecdotal experience, most of the black men who have been with white women viewed them as a sort of status symbol. Their way of getting back at "the white man" for keeping their women locked away in taboo land, I suppose. I don't see that sort of status mindset attached to black women by white men who like them, though I'm sure that some do have an interracial fetish. In other words, most white guys who like a black girl (myself included) like her because she's her, not because she's chocolate. The reverse pairing, unfortunately, tends not to be the same.

Concerning women in the white woman + black man pair, every white girl that I've known who went after black men was sexually liberal (to be polite about it) or downright skanky. Yes, I know anecdotal =/= scientific, but that's my experience.

On a separate but related note, one of my best friends (who is black) told me what his grandma used to say: "When a brotha gets a white woman, she usually ain't much to look at, but when a white boy gets a sista, he picks the best lookin' one of the bunch!" I always got a kick out of that statement for some reason.

[Asker]

valid points! Wow thats crazy your grandma said that, because my boyfriend literally got high-fived by those black dudes, and is constantly complimented about dating me when we go out, and vice versa.

I mean stereotypically white men are said to have top of the line, so if he does date out, I suppose she would be?

[Anonymous]

So... I actually didn't notice this until you mentioned it but you're right. When I see a black woman dating a white man, I seriously view her as a classy woman with good taste. When I see a white woman dating a black man, I usually think she is a crack whore. Wow. I guess that makes me a fucking racist without ever even realizing it.

But its fucking weird, right? Because like, I know sooooo many fantastic black men. My step dad is black and I dont view my mom (a white woman) as a crack whore. I see it as a normal because she's always liked black men. But if it's any other white woman, my mind instantly thinks the worst and I become super judgmental.

This could be because of how much shit is shoved down our throats by the media too though. Whenever you see pictures of white women with black men, generally it is a photo of two poverty stricken people in the ghetto. They dont show pictures of successful, intelligent, down to earth black men with classy white women. And there are so many interracial relationships that are in fact between successful black men who have their lives put together and classy white women so it's not like it's a lacking subject. But that's the media for you! Just constantly giving black men a bad stigma. Dont get me wrong, a lot of individuals do live up to that stigma but not all of them. I have met far more fantastic black men than I have shit bags.

*Not saying people in the ghetto can't be classy. I guess nothing is unheard of.*

[cavmanier]

I think it comes largely due to how a lot of black men carry themselves. You alluded to this by saying "relaxed temperment of white men." Black men are more likely to be into gangs, crime, anger over petty things and what many consider lower class.

Saying that though, due to our PC fake virtue signaling, surface level appearance culture and hyper sensitivity of the people wanting to mask reality, this is a sub conscious stereotype based on statistics and doesn't represent all black men. I'll also give you the "some of my best friends have been black" so I can seem like a good person for the PC mafia. It's true though. I've meet some great black guys, one was black from Africa though so he doesn't count as American black. He's one the the best guys I know. He married a white girl and I'm happy for them. And he is actually BLACK as in dark skin and zero white ancestry like most African Americans.

[BeMuse]

Probably because white people aren't a hive mind and we're bound to have different opinions. The Man isn't really real...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IC5DGv3EPU8

[jshm2]

You've got that the wrong way round, kid.

White women dating Black guys is seen as "exotic". But Black women "going cracker" is seen as daddy/personality issues.

It's more to do with culture and identity, than just race and politics.

[TotallyAlmost]

Doesn't help that there is a massive pop culture of black guys proudly portraying themselves as pimps and degrading women as sex objects.

[Asker]

Point made - I think of that as trying to overcompensate, or flex for some reason. I hate that. I mean all races sexualize their women, but cmon...

[TripleAce]

Because the vibe is that from some black girls or families even, having a a white male signifies an ‘upgrade’

Whereas a black women is a ‘downgrade’. So it seems from some

Now it’s not just black males and women. It’s actually all of them. A white male is more sought out after on average vs an Asian, East Asian, Latin or European male

[capncool]

Because we're surrounded by stupid people who perpetuate these dumb ideas, and many of those stupid people happen to have some degree of control over the powers that be.

[Anonymous]

It's because of porn and that Cuckolding crap.
Some white women really buy into the black penis stereotypes and like to throw it in the face of white guys.
It just ruins it for the white female/black male couples who are actually together for love.
I think people see white male/black female relationships as more pure.
It must be love kinda thing because it's not as fetishized in porn.

[name_is_eric]

It's what interracial dating brings. People use it as a bragging right.
My honest opinion is that both are trashy.

[zagor]

I don't hear people say that shit. I think you are hearing what you want to hear.

[malegender]

virtually 100% of white woman/black man marriages are dissolved by year 11. That is why.

[dev765]

It's just a shaming tactic by the insecure to keep white women away from black men.

[TheSpartan]

Simple, because the statistics around White-woman-Black-man relationships are terrible.

[Anonymous]

Haha erotic. Most black girls are not so keen about dating white blokes

[Anonymous]

Black women are pickier

[kreamykraemez]

It's not unless you thin it is

[Anonymous]

"firm temperament" LOL

[Asker]

Lol heeeey, thats the nice way of putting it. We can be as mean as fuck lol

[DNA63]

It just jealously on the blond girls

[maadison]

Nice