4 times in my life I've met girls that made me want to really try to build something special and so I approached them like a proper gentleman, I tried to get to know them and not rush into anything. None of them wanted me and I ended up alone, heartbroken, and confused.
4 times I've pursued girls who were wonderful people, but I couldn't build the life I wanted with them, I approached them with shallow Intentions, flirted with them shamelessly, and had a physical relationship with them. All 4 of them confessed a desire to build a life with me.
That has been the entirety of my experiences with women.
Gentlemanly approach=100% failure, heartbreak, and loneliness.
Flirty shallow jerk approach=100% success, happiness, and desired for relationship.
What kind of person should I be? I'm so tired of trying to be the good guy just to be left alone, confused, and in pain.
I don't mean this to sound harsh but the women I see asking this question tend to be older than the average age here on GAG. Most of the men women tend to think of as "good guys" get married in their early to late 20s to the women most guys think of as "good girls".
When I think back to the guys I knew in high school, in retrospect I can see which of them were the "good guys", even though some of them were not necessarily the most popular at the time. But they were smart and did well in school, they were less likely to be sleeping around, more likely to be the family oriented, marrying type of guys. I would say probably about half of the guys I knew then fell into that category, and every one of them was married within about 5 - 7 years after high school.
In my opinion many women these days miss the window to find a "good guy".
*raises hand* take me! Take me! Im all alone, in my dark corner of the universe. Drifting away, slowly, looking for a thread to pull myself back into the light... meanwhile trying to keep my light on as a beacon so others can be guided back into the light- this is difficult, I am gonna disappear now. Baibai.
Are they? Don't worry, another batch are coming. 😁 But wouldn't men think the same about "good" women being rare nowadays? I guess there'll still be "good men" available if we lower our standards on the qualities of men we categorize as good from bad. We had too much idealisms and expectations about men and relationships that sometimes we tend to overlook one important fact: are we good enough too to deserve a good man?
I think a lot of woman feel this way and I have felt like that too at times but as woman we need to keep believing that itâs possible to find a good guy that is single - in this life - you get what you expect to get - so even when itâs doubtful you have to expect the good you want.
The definition of a good guy varies from person to person and you might not be looking in the right place or talking to the right people. As for the men who have proclaimed themselves good guys, just stop. If I find a good guy, it's because of my personal view on what that means - not because he kept telling me he was a good guy and pities himself.
They arenât, women who say that are typically just passing them over for other guys. Itâs not a coincidence that most women date assholes. Lower your standards and go out with the fat bald guy you know, he is likely one of those good guys, you probably just overlooked him.
I know a lot of good guys who won't even look at, let alone talk to a woman anymore.
Women love to pat themselves on the back for having impossibly high standards, but when a man has high standards, women are the first ones to attack him for it.
I'm sure that good guys are out there. Somewhere. BUT. I bet my life they are hurt and still in love with their exes or they simply want to settle for the second best thing. And when his current girl, find out, he will be categorised in the "jerk" section. Paradox.
Nope, we still out here, were still taken for granted... and most of us are still single. I have 9 other friends who are all in the same boat too... we are honestly just so tired of putting our hearts out there only to have them stepped on that we stop trying :/ such is life
I look and have beautiful women, I am just ordinary. But I have always found a good decent beautiful woman. But I can win them over easily. I would like to think I am a good man. Never cheated on my wife or girlfriends. I provide because I can for most of our living expenses. When I am short my wife gives me her money. Men be honest with your wife, mine is 36 20 34. She is still all I want, women look after yourself, look good when he comes home from work, greet him like he is your husband. Fulfill his basic needs love attention and lots of sex.
All of the good guys aren't taken, mist if them such as myself are just at home playimg games ir watching tv. I really don't go out that much because I like hangout only with my friends and family. So, when ever a girl sees me she might think I'm loner or taken.
Not all are taken. You cannot simply tell if someone's really good or bad. It's tuff to identify true gentleman from the bad guys today. Most of the time all seem similar. Maybe you're right in a way but I know many good guys who are single. I'm single myself but I'm a kid so... it's the way it should be. Yeah if I'll be single for next 10 years I'll come bake to reply again 😂 and I don't think I'll have to.
I know a lot of us decent guys have given up. All we can find is women who are all about money, or they get whatever it is they want then they walk away. Or they feign being interested, then don't bother texting back, rather than being nice enough to just plain out say they aren't interested. Dating has become such a circus, maybe now we see why homosexuality is on the rise. Get tired of the opposite genders' crap? Look elsewhere. :) It's a new world, I guess.
You don't find many good guys in bars or tinder, if that's the implied question.
Change your area of attack, cause most guys I know go to bars purely to hook up. So yeah, plenty of good guys, but most don't go to bars.
(Example: Try the mall or shopping places. There you have a really good chance. Unconventional, but I've met great people this way. Asking for directions is a classic opener, so give it a try!)
All the good guys will be taken if your criteria for what make up a good guy is so narrow and unrealistic that such a guy does not exist.
Therefore, the perception of the definition of a good guy is subjective. The level of a woman's standards is is inversely proportional to the prevalence of "good men".
Not all but you wonât find the good ones in bars and clubs. You have to go way deeper which is why so many women donât even bother. We are so conditioned to instant gratification.
Going to churches doesn't make you a good person. Drinking doesn't make you a bad person. Everyone has their stress relievers and it's completely okay to drink once in a while. Just because you go to a bar doesn't make you a fuckboy that's great in bed and great with the ladies. Bars do tend to attract a less intelligent crowd, however that doesn't mean good guys and girls aren't occasionally curious to try it out or feel something drawing them back to it, whether it's lonliness, hope tagging along for a friend's sake or event (like a birthday) or some other aspect. Wherever you go, you'd be lucky to find someone with similar interests, views, sense of humor, etc. So always keep your eyes peeled. That's all I'm saying.
@Ayer93 of course. There are may cases that "good guys" are seen in more "questional" places and likewise, many "bad guys", even real criminals visit the church.
But just saying in general, birds of the same feathers flock together.
Look, all Iâm saying is that if Iâm looking for someone who is looking for more than sex, treat me right, or have a great conversation with, the club wonât be the first thing that pops into my head to look.
I understand that you can find good people everywhere but they are typically less frequent at the bars.
I believe there are some good guys left. But you or anyone for that matter need to act fast. Good guys are âthe lamesâ of today from societies standard. And to be shunned from ânormal lifeâ is a hard thing to do. Some of them get helplessly depressed and, some adapts to the âpimp/playerâ persona. From that stand point I say donât wait for the lake to be a pond. âGet fishingâ
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4 times in my life I've met girls that made me want to really try to build something special and so I approached them like a proper gentleman, I tried to get to know them and not rush into anything. None of them wanted me and I ended up alone, heartbroken, and confused.
4 times I've pursued girls who were wonderful people, but I couldn't build the life I wanted with them, I approached them with shallow Intentions, flirted with them shamelessly, and had a physical relationship with them. All 4 of them confessed a desire to build a life with me.
That has been the entirety of my experiences with women.
Gentlemanly approach=100% failure, heartbreak, and loneliness.
Flirty shallow jerk approach=100% success, happiness, and desired for relationship.
What kind of person should I be? I'm so tired of trying to be the good guy just to be left alone, confused, and in pain.
Interesting. Thank you for sharing. But would it be because of your age?
How would my age change things?
I don't mean this to sound harsh but the women I see asking this question tend to be older than the average age here on GAG. Most of the men women tend to think of as "good guys" get married in their early to late 20s to the women most guys think of as "good girls".
When I think back to the guys I knew in high school, in retrospect I can see which of them were the "good guys", even though some of them were not necessarily the most popular at the time. But they were smart and did well in school, they were less likely to be sleeping around, more likely to be the family oriented, marrying type of guys. I would say probably about half of the guys I knew then fell into that category, and every one of them was married within about 5 - 7 years after high school.
In my opinion many women these days miss the window to find a "good guy".
Thanks for sharing đ
Any time.
*raises hand* take me! Take me! Im all alone, in my dark corner of the universe. Drifting away, slowly, looking for a thread to pull myself back into the light... meanwhile trying to keep my light on as a beacon so others can be guided back into the light- this is difficult, I am gonna disappear now. Baibai.
đđđ
Are they? Don't worry, another batch are coming. 😁
But wouldn't men think the same about "good" women being rare nowadays?
I guess there'll still be "good men" available if we lower our standards on the qualities of men we categorize as good from bad. We had too much idealisms and expectations about men and relationships that sometimes we tend to overlook one important fact: are we good enough too to deserve a good man?
Thanks for sharing đ
I think a lot of woman feel this way and I have felt like that too at times but as woman we need to keep believing that itâs possible to find a good guy that is single - in this life - you get what you expect to get - so even when itâs doubtful you have to expect the good you want.
The definition of a good guy varies from person to person and you might not be looking in the right place or talking to the right people. As for the men who have proclaimed themselves good guys, just stop. If I find a good guy, it's because of my personal view on what that means - not because he kept telling me he was a good guy and pities himself.
đ¸đđ¸
They arenât, women who say that are typically just passing them over for other guys. Itâs not a coincidence that most women date assholes. Lower your standards and go out with the fat bald guy you know, he is likely one of those good guys, you probably just overlooked him.
đđđ
I know a lot of good guys who won't even look at, let alone talk to a woman anymore.
Women love to pat themselves on the back for having impossibly high standards, but when a man has high standards, women are the first ones to attack him for it.
I'm sure that good guys are out there. Somewhere. BUT. I bet my life they are hurt and still in love with their exes or they simply want to settle for the second best thing. And when his current girl, find out, he will be categorised in the "jerk" section. Paradox.
"Good" is very subjective.
Are virgin guys "good"? There are plenty here in G@G.
Or are promiscuous guys good? Probably much more here.
Or are Asian guys good? They could be on the shorter side but they know how to love.
So you see, preferences depends on who you are. Guy who are available, plenty. Do you want them?
Nope, we still out here, were still taken for granted... and most of us are still single. I have 9 other friends who are all in the same boat too... we are honestly just so tired of putting our hearts out there only to have them stepped on that we stop trying :/ such is life
Don't think so... there are a lot of good guys out there who are not considered attractive, so they're single🤷ââď¸
I look and have beautiful women, I am just ordinary. But I have always found a good decent beautiful woman. But I can win them over easily. I would like to think I am a good man. Never cheated on my wife or girlfriends. I provide because I can for most of our living expenses. When I am short my wife gives me her money. Men be honest with your wife, mine is 36 20 34. She is still all I want, women look after yourself, look good when he comes home from work, greet him like he is your husband. Fulfill his basic needs love attention and lots of sex.
Here is your dream man that you women/media promote by selection in this society:
If there are good guys, they are long gone with good women hidden away from it all.
Eww no it's not. đđđ
Fake lol
False*
All of the good guys aren't taken, mist if them such as myself are just at home playimg games ir watching tv. I really don't go out that much because I like hangout only with my friends and family. So, when ever a girl sees me she might think I'm loner or taken.
That's good đ
Sorry for the typos I wrote when I sleepy and I was in mobile
No probs. â¤ď¸
Not all are taken. You cannot simply tell if someone's really good or bad. It's tuff to identify true gentleman from the bad guys today. Most of the time all seem similar. Maybe you're right in a way but I know many good guys who are single. I'm single myself but I'm a kid so... it's the way it should be. Yeah if I'll be single for next 10 years I'll come bake to reply again 😂 and I don't think I'll have to.
đđđ
đđ
I know a lot of us decent guys have given up. All we can find is women who are all about money, or they get whatever it is they want then they walk away. Or they feign being interested, then don't bother texting back, rather than being nice enough to just plain out say they aren't interested. Dating has become such a circus, maybe now we see why homosexuality is on the rise. Get tired of the opposite genders' crap? Look elsewhere. :) It's a new world, I guess.
You don't find many good guys in bars or tinder, if that's the implied question.
Change your area of attack, cause most guys I know go to bars purely to hook up. So yeah, plenty of good guys, but most don't go to bars.
(Example: Try the mall or shopping places. There you have a really good chance. Unconventional, but I've met great people this way. Asking for directions is a classic opener, so give it a try!)
All the good guys will be taken if your criteria for what make up a good guy is so narrow and unrealistic that such a guy does not exist.
Therefore, the perception of the definition of a good guy is subjective. The level of a woman's standards is is inversely proportional to the prevalence of "good men".
Not all but you wonât find the good ones in bars and clubs. You have to go way deeper which is why so many women donât even bother. We are so conditioned to instant gratification.
Your right. .
There are good guys that go to bars occasionally as well. You can find good people wherever you are.
Yeah... but thatâs definitely not the first place I look.
@Ayer93 oh yeha ! Iâd still be careful.
Hmmmm...
If "good" = "conservative" then true, not in bars and pubs. Visit churches instead.
But if '"good" = "experienced, great in bed", then actually bars and clubs are their playground.
Going to churches doesn't make you a good person. Drinking doesn't make you a bad person. Everyone has their stress relievers and it's completely okay to drink once in a while. Just because you go to a bar doesn't make you a fuckboy that's great in bed and great with the ladies. Bars do tend to attract a less intelligent crowd, however that doesn't mean good guys and girls aren't occasionally curious to try it out or feel something drawing them back to it, whether it's lonliness, hope tagging along for a friend's sake or event (like a birthday) or some other aspect. Wherever you go, you'd be lucky to find someone with similar interests, views, sense of humor, etc. So always keep your eyes peeled. That's all I'm saying.
@Ayer93 of course. There are may cases that "good guys" are seen in more "questional" places and likewise, many "bad guys", even real criminals visit the church.
But just saying in general, birds of the same feathers flock together.
Look, all Iâm saying is that if Iâm looking for someone who is looking for more than sex, treat me right, or have a great conversation with, the club wonât be the first thing that pops into my head to look.
I understand that you can find good people everywhere but they are typically less frequent at the bars.
I believe there are some good guys left. But you or anyone for that matter need to act fast. Good guys are âthe lamesâ of today from societies standard. And to be shunned from ânormal lifeâ is a hard thing to do. Some of them get helplessly depressed and, some adapts to the âpimp/playerâ persona. From that stand point I say donât wait for the lake to be a pond. âGet fishingâ