Why do you friendzone people?

[Rangers]

Do you do it because you view them as not good enough to date? The usual response is "I'm not into them" but it's too broad for me and I wonder what's hiding behind that very typical saying. I have become the champion of being friendzoned and have never been on a date because of it, not through an absence of effort on my part to evolve and mature though. What exactly makes you friendzone someone?

[Carbon-12]

You cannot control attraction to people. If you are not into them, yiu are not into them. I have a lot of friends who I love hanging out with but would not date.
Most of the time when someone is in the friendzone they see the other through rose coloured glasses. They think they would be perfect as a couple when in reality they would not.
I think a better question is why are you perusing girls who don't want to be with you?

I had one guy friend who hinted at wanting more than friendship. He stright up said multiple times that he would go out with me, and I said every time that I wouldn't go out with him.
Let me explain. I want to date someone who is my best friend, who sees me as their equal, and loves me for every part of me good and bad.
After getting to know him I realized he didn't fulfill any of the requirements. I didn't have good conversations with him like I do my besties. He did not see me as his equal, which was evident by him speaking for me a lot of the time. Most importantly he started saying things like "well you know you are a little bit weird...", and he didn't like it when I did things that "aren't like me". He wanted me to be someone I was not. However he was like totally into that person he decided I was.

[Rangers]

You can control whether or not you lead them on and give them false hope. And I have no way of knowing beforehand whether or not they'll want to be with me.

[Carbon-12]

That right there is why you don't have a girlfriend. How is being friends with you giving you false hope? Do you also get offended when your guy friends don't want to date you?

[Rangers]

Saying things like "I wish more guys were like you" or "any girl would be lucky to be with you" or other lies like that meant to give me false hope so that I stay around for their attention is objectively wrong. I don't have any friends and I'm not gay, so no

[Carbon-12]

So it is wrong for them to try and make you feel better about yourself? I only say stuff like that if I mean it. If you interpret it wrong that is your fault.

If you can't maintain friendships than you are not ready for a romantic relationship. Get some friends and work on yourself. After you do that you shouldn't have a problem finding sombody.

[Rangers]

This is where I criticize liberals a ton, they do things that feel good as opposed to things that actually do good. Lying is never the right thing to do and we both know it's not coming from a good place, it's coming from a place of her wanting attention and validation. I've done thousands of lifetimes of work on myself and I'm fine with not having friends, they can only hold me back anyways, especially female "friends". I seek a life companion who I can give and receive love with. But this nonsense makes me seriously question if it's worth the effort or if trying to be with someone is simply an act of futility.

[Carbon-12]

Liberalism as in th belief of individual rights and freedoms? I do understand it is a political party I just find it so funny when people talk about those dang liberals.
You see other people have this thing called empathy, you should try it.

So basically you don't give a fuck about people and just want sex?

[Rangers]

I don't know where you got the idea that I want sex, I literally said I wanted a life partner who I could give and receive love from. Liberalism is the opposite of the belief of individual rights and freedom, do you even live in America? You're constantly belittling me and telling me to have empathy? That's laughable

[Carbon-12]

Look up liberalism. It is an ideology. The political liberal party is based on modern liberalism, whereas the conservative are more classical liberal. They are both fighting for freedom, just bu different means. The problem is that you have so many dogmatic, petty, idots in your country that most of you don't even know what liberalism is.

As for the whole relationship thing... You don't understand women, as such you will find it very hard to find a relationship. Women are just people, if you don't see a point in having friends than again it shows you are not ready for a relationship.

You are only 20 I am sure you will find love at some point in your life. IF and only IF you stop being petty about it. Which generally happens with age.

As for the whole empathy thing, and me belittling you. Whenever I see posts like this it makes me sick to my stomach. Guys like you are the main reason I am not currently dating. Trust me if I really wanted to belittle you, I would be saying a lot worse.

[Rangers]

The definition isn't followed by people who identify as liberal anymore, it now means amnesty to felons, open borders, no right to self preservation, and the destruction of our constitution that makes us the greatest country in the world. I have a genetic disease that cuts my lifespan in half, which not only makes that a massive thing that they'll have to accept, but it means I have far less time to waste hopelessly putting a mask on to cater to what women like. Guys who know what cards you'll try to play scare you? Good

[Rangers]

And you know I'm right about friends, they'll just jam themselves in between you and your partner, and most people these days have lost their way, I'm not going to babysit them to make sure they aren't engaging in self destructive behavior they're so tempted to engage in like doing drugs and casual hookups.

[aWes0MeNeSs]

I'm just not attracted to them in a romantic way. That's something you can't really force; it's either there or it's not (and believe me, I did make the mistake of trying to fit a round peg into a square hole and make it work with a guy I wasn't really romantically interested in, and it ended in disaster and many more hurt feelings than if I would've just rejected him).

It's not because they're not good enough or anything like that, as often times they're great quality people that I still cherish as friends (which is not a bad thing), but if the feelings aren't there, they simply aren't there. I don't really know how else to explain it.

[Rangers]

No girl wants a guy friend, they have girls for that. They don't think he's good enough to date but want him for attention, that's what it is. The right thing to do is to say no and stop talking to them, rather than torture them and use them for attention.

[aWes0MeNeSs]

I actually prefer guys as friends, lol. No turbo bitchiness, cattiness, competitiveness, and usually limited drama compared to girls. It seems that at least 8 or 9 times out of 10, my female friends end up becoming jealous of me or trying to compete with me (usually by trying to put me down), despite me wanting nothing to do with any of that. I also just click better with guys than girls.

I absolutely don't want any of my friends for "attention", and am the last person to try to use anyone or play with their feelings, as I know how that feels. I have friends because I enjoy their company and think they're good people. Why would what's between someone's legs dictate whether or not they would make a good friend? Why would a woman be a better friend than a man just because she happens to be a woman like me?

Like I already said, my intentions to be friends with someone are genuine and I have no use for attention. However, I'd think that if a guy thought I was torturing him by only wanting to be his friend, then there's probably a good chance he only wanted to use me for sex and didn't actually ever like me as a person in the first place.

[soleil2666]

@aWes0MeNeSs I wish women were clear on this with me when I was 20 - you are talking about the PHYSICAL ATTRACTION. Pure and simple. Finding someone a turn-on, sexually It's not even romance.
The rest is a 'relationship' - like it is with any other human. But if the sexual/erotic PURELY PHYSICAL attraction isn't there, it won't make you happy.
We are sexual beings primarily, it is how children come into the world, so it is silly to deny this is the key component. Not the only one, but it is key.

[aWes0MeNeSs]

@soleil2666 Yes, that's true, and if it isn't there, it just isn't!

[soleil2666]

@aWes0MeNeSs Not just that, but if it isn't there, and there's any other liking, you are effectively a 'friends' candidate - women process relational information more completely, softer and faster - and in that sense it's great to have a female friend or two for anyone.
Guys can only tell you to be 'tough' - which is awfully poor advice for the myriad of things one goes through.

[aWes0MeNeSs]

@soleil2666 Yes, I don't understand how some people think opposite sexes can't be friends!

[soleil2666]

@aWes0MeNeSs I've heard a view that it is 'offensive' to be friends with someone of the opposite sex, because you inherently state 'I don't find you sexually appealing'.
But that part I do find wrong - doing without the company of the opposite sex you do end up not understanding it altogether - and I happen to find it obligatory for everyone to accept SOMEONE won't like them sexually.
So to demand that you always get sexually 'respected' - in the sense that 'yes I would sleep with you' is crazy.
Besides, even mild sexual attraction doesn't mean you need to be going at it - the society at large hasn't defined where you go get the cuddles from - much as getting those from male friends does get some care conveyed, having female friends, certainly while single, seems obligatory to me.
(And even in a relationship - who can tell you the opposite gender's angle/point of view but a friend of that opposite gender?)
(Not claiming I am right - this is my thought of the moment/current topic of interest)

[Rangers]

It's because men and women have nothing in common, friends have to have something in common, and men and women don't at all

[soleil2666]

@Rangers I disagree with that entirely - first of all, why would you spend time with people who have things in common with you - just to get your views confirmed? That sounds like insecurity to me.
Sure, you'll get the 'bro' understanding from guys - but you won't really get that from men - men have handled their own sexuality and don't need to whine about it.

[Rangers]

I'm talking about common interests

[Crimson811]

If someone isn’t interested, they’re not interested. Nobody owes someone a date or a relationship.

[soleil2666]

I don't know that I have common interests more in line with men than women.
Generally things are nicer when done with a female - they tend to assume care is just there so the experiences are more pleasant.
I don't watch sports, only engage in them when I exercise/practice, computer stuff I do alone anyhow so nobody obstructs me, and any social activity is much nicer with a female.
Maybe it's comfort zone thing - I had a primary school teacher who favoured girls (including for maths funnily enough - so it was 6 girls and me in a separate class most of the time)

[soleil2666]

@Crimson811 nobody owes anyone anything - but smart people do act kindly

[aWes0MeNeSs]

Why wouldn't men and women have anything in common? Some share similar hobbies and interests, similar personalities, etc.

If they have nothing in common, then how do relationships work? Why isn't everyone attracted to the same sex, then?

[aWes0MeNeSs]

@soleil2666 Exactly!

[aWes0MeNeSs]

@Crimson811 Exactly, thank you!

[Rangers]

Men and women are different, to put it simply. It's no coincidence that for every woman, there's literally 50 guys when i play airsoft and go shooting or to gun shows

[aWes0MeNeSs]

It doesn't mean they can't still have things in common and relate to each other, or be friends.

I'm a girl, but have absolutely zero interest in fashion, shopping, etc. There are a lot of women I don't have a lot in common with, especially since it seems the main focus of most women my age is marriage and children, neither of which I have any desire for at the moment.

[Rangers]

Men and women act completely different and if they can't relate at all, that's a big problem. I'm also very conservative whereas most girls are very liberal, and the few conservative girls are always taken.

[aWes0MeNeSs]

I'm conservative as well, but I think our general age range/generation is mostly liberal between both men and women, honestly, though I do think there are more women liberals than men from what I can tell. Young people in general tend to be more liberal, though.

[Rangers]

Exactly, liberals and conservatives don't mix, especially in this day and age. Most men are conservative, most women are liberal, so they can't mix on a platonic level

[aWes0MeNeSs]

It doesn't mean men and women in general can't mix on a platonic level. Not every man is a conservative and not every woman is a liberal. Not to mention that if you can't connect with the person as a friend, how could you fall in love with them? For me, I have to befriend someone before I develop feelings for them, and I could never develop romantic feelings for someone I couldn't even get along with.

[soleil2666]

Eeeeevryone is busy defining EVERYTHING as if that were possible.
Platonic is love with no sex. Not remotely the same as friendship.
I don't care, I don't mind - half of 'let's be friends' is 'let me get to know you for marriage/dating' first, before anything sexual. Another 40% is leading you on (I was told by a woman she'd have to friend-zone me after I didn't show enough interest. She was busy with tit for tat, as most are). The last 10% is actually friendly people, as in 'I do like something about you but I'm not sure about sex'. And any and all CAN turn sexual - and guess what - it is NOT the end of the world if they do. Or if they don't. Or if you drift apart. Overthinking to that level is a certain indicator of insecurity.

[jss123]

Interesting. I asked someone to be more than friends. Were were going out alone together a few times a week for 6 months already. She's asked me out so it made sense. She gave me a non committal "I'll try" answer.. She didn't ever try. She just didn't want us to stop going out because I was the one almost always paying, i was buying her nice things such as clothes and perfume.. When I found out what she was doing I asked her if she actually had feelings for me.. She didn't answer me and we haven't spoken since. Her doing.. I'd rather have been friend zoned... I'm staying single... I don't trust women anymore. Especially women who claim to be religious...

[sexyhotasian]

Why you're friendzoned? you're probably afraid of saying what's on your mind bc you don't want to offend them. If you can't pass that barrier, they can't see if you're compatible. If she asks if you like alcohol, and you don't, you tell her no and don't need to explain yourself. Never lie to fit with society. Be the expert in who you are and let others figure it out. Theyll visualize their future with you naturally if theyre interested. Girls like assholes cause they aren't afraid to say what's on their mind and do what they want. Whether it's a good asshole or bad asshole, that's up to them.

[ChronicThinker]

I don't "friend zone" anyone. You either were a prospective partner choice for me OR... you were a friend.

[Rangers]

You literally said "I don't friendzone people, but I friendzone people"

[soleil2666]

The 'friend-zone' seems to imply you might get a chance but she's checking you out until then.
A straight 'friend' means there's no sexual attraction or you are in other ways not a candidate (nor expected to be).
Women are brutal when it comes to this (men possibly as well but women have too much pride to complain - they just dish it back out).
You might want to get to being the best version of yourself looks-wise - and in every other way you can.
There's not a whole lot you can do if someone finds you non-appealing sexually - exercise, fix you skin, fix your teeth (then personality traits).

[Rangers]

@soleil2666 That's garbage and you know it, come on.

[HumanoidMale]

@Rangers it may seem like bullshit to you but that's how it works sometimes. You are not attracted to everyone you are friends with ( most of the time ), in that regard I don't believe you aren't friends with at least one person you are attracted to.
So, YES, there are people who are just friends and if the other catches feelings and the other doesn't feel the same it's not their fault and it shouldn't be held against them.
Just cause you like someone and they don't like you like that and they would rather stay friends isn't really putting you into the "friend zone" cause in order to be put in the "friend zone" you would have had to leave it in the first place.

[Rangers]

@HumanoidMale When they keep saying it'll turn into something (which they know it won't, they just want to keep them for attention and validation) instead of having the common courtesy to just say it how it is, that wouldn't be a problem.

[HumanoidMale]

@Rangers
Then that is a completely different beast.
That's not "friend zone-ing" it's just leading you on.
And it's not their fault at this point tbh, yes they are doing it but you can leave at any point. You know it's going on, You know it's happening to you, but You won't leave on your own accord?
Bro that's ignorance..
If you know this is going on then just leave.
The answer is right in front of you, but you refuse to see it.
You are denying the truth that you already know is fact.
You are doing this to yourself at this point.
Sorry bro

[Rangers]

@HumanoidMale I'm talking in general, most guys don't know this and get held back and used for attention as a result. That is the girl's fault, they're intentionally leading the guys on so they can keep him for validation, which is unacceptable behavior

[HumanoidMale]

@Rangers
I don't know who hurt you if anyone even did but every situation that is live the one you are talking about is not all one person's fault. Yes the girl did it but anyone with a braincell can realize what they are doing. It's not hard to see it.

I went through something like this and ya know what, I had a bit of hope, but I wasn't hung up on it. When a girl says that and you still stick around it's not her fault that you stayed. It's your decision to stay.

Yeah if you leave, you will most likely get hurt, but if you stay it's on you and you will probably get hurt more.

So I don't know what's going on but good luck with whatever this is.

[Rangers]

@HumanoidMale If they're inexperienced with women, it's not necessarily their fault for not picking up on it as experience is the only way to start knowing when these things are happening, unfortunately.

[HumanoidMale]

@Rangers not necessarily.

This type of thing can be understood by almost anyone.

Like you said earlier "I don't want to date, but maybe in the future" (don't remember exact wording) , but if that was said then she literally spelled it out for you. You don't need experience to understand the meaning of that sentence.

When someone says that, Male or Female it makes no difference. And to understand what it means takes maybe as much knowledge as an eighth grader, and that's pushing it.

Anyone past that who still listens to stuff like that and actually believes that it's a 100% thing and gives up on looking for anyone else Is just an ignorant fool.

Sorry if this fool is you, but come on man. This is literally something you see in tv, movies, and even all the time in real life.

There has to be a point where you are just hurting yourself, and if you get to that point it's nobody else's fault, it will be 100% on you.

[Rangers]

@HumaniodMale I don't believe in white lies, a lie is a lie is a lie is a lie, period. I don't like liars, and a girl who deceives guys for validation and attention is certainly no exception to that rule.

[HumanoidMale]

@Rangers

Then stop lying to yourself.

[Rangers]

@HumaniodMale I'm not, you are. You agreed that neither party is completely at blame, but then say I'm lying to myself for thinking that?

[HumanoidMale]

@Rangers

I actually said BOTH parties were to blame.

The girl / guy for leading them on

And the girl / guy for being ignorant

[HumanoidMale]

@Rangers

Look, I don't know what you want me to say tbh.

I've been through this, but all it took for me to understand what was going on was to open my fucking eyes and see what was going on around me.

There isn't just that one person, there are a lot of people out there, and I learned that real quick.

I was still in middle school when I learned this shit.

So if you don't understand this by this point in your life, then it is nobody's fault but your own.

[ChronicThinker]

No, he's got the nail right on the head. If you were a friend you were always a friend. If you were a prospect you were always a prospect. I don't really try to get to know guys romantically and then decide to make them friends.

[ChronicThinker]

There's a lot of immature butt-hurtedness floating around this question. Gents need to give their fucking balls a tug.

[Rangers]

That's not a substantive argument

[HumanoidMale]

@ChronicThinker I'm a bit confused but I feel like you agree with me?
Am I correct?

[soleil2666]

@HumanoidMale @Rangers
Both of you guys have VERY valid points but from a different mindset.
I can fully appreciate a no-lies policy (it wrenches your gut a whole lot less when you don't start caring for someone who lies to the level that your gut starts wrenching - I got set up for that recently even though I wasn't interested to begin with/her vibe was just wrong. But, being a good fella, I joined in (and was then treated to her licking some vile creature 2h later - I think so she can have her argument with her daddy or so, don't really know - too weird for me, and I've always been taken as an authority figure quickly)

But you can also either willingly accept to go for a ride, see if validation is all that she is after - it is quicker to deal wit liars that way - rather than get worked up about it (since unfortunately it isn't a crime) - you let her show off your attention, she gets carried away, you know it's time to drop it (her wishes will diverge from yours very quickly - not more than 15 minutes is needed, 30 if you want to double check it)

You can also call it out right away and it does work - the moment someone starts sucking up to you just for validation, give them a 'sorry love can't be bothered to just validate you' - or, even better - respond with 'let's have sex' and watch what happens.

A woman with real interest will contemplate it at the very least. A validation seeking one will get angry as if you asked her to hang herself. There's nothing wrong with sex, so asking someone sucking up to you about it should be a very natural flow.

[soleil2666]

Finally, regarding actually being friends - if you are looking for a relationship (and especially if you already have someone on the side which most people end up doing) - you're better off becoming friends first anyhow to check if it is worth sleeping with each other or not - that only comes down to loyalty in the long run, which does take a while to be sure of (if for no other reason, then because both need to double-check how you feel the day after - sometimes the attraction of the moment looks bizarre in hindsight, and having sex would make you feel awkward (or, in theory, disgusted)

Plus, no one will ever say this, but women suffer yeast infections and all manner of diseases all the time, so they friend-zone you while trying to damage control/being on whatever medication they need to take (vile creatures, some really are - even with a decent exterior - and at times through no fault of their own - just messy/crap parents)

[Account]

They lack the traits that would make me interested in them. It is as simple as that.

[moststrangestguy]

Dark traits

[Account]

Whatever I want them to be.

[soleil2666]

@Account
You're just arguing with the guy - you have close to ZERO control over what you find attractive. And you are certainly not in control when it comes to getting it.
Give him a break.

[Account]

You know better. LOL

[soleil2666]

Find someone else to be mean towards. Someone who's upbeat.

[Jean-Marie_Céline]

Because they are better fit as friends rather than girlfriends.
I know it sounds harsh.

[nopedydoo]

usually its because im not physically attracted to them and because they just dont seem compatible for me. ill befriend anyone assuming theyre kind, but i have a type when it comes to dating. also i read your comments where you said no one wants a friend of the opposite sex... and that is completely wrong. a good portion of my friends are guys, and there is no difference between our friendship and my friendship with girls. its not like im lusting after them whenever i see them. no. because theyre not my type and i simply domt feel an attraction towards them. i just dont understand why youd limit yourself to one gender to befriend? i mean you could have twice as many friends...

either way you're being friendzoned because the girl simply does not like you. i think its very rare for someone to friendzone someone out of fear of ruining their friendship.

[Rangers]

The right thing to do is to say it how it is and stop talking to them, rather than give them false hope. And men and women are completely incompatible in friendships.

[nopedydoo]

i dont understand why you think that. i have good friendships with males as well as females. i just have different interests that both genders can relate to better than one can. im in a lot of male-dominated clubs at school and consequently im friends with many of them. its not my fault im interested in stem more than other girls, but i also dont want to limit my friendships to the 2 other girls who have the same interests as me

[Dongtai]

Friendzone is a mentality. If someone you like rejects you, friend or not, it’s on them if they choose to move on or consider themselves friendzoned. I’m not obligated to date a girl because we’re friends.

The list as to why I’d reject any girl is pretty long but the basics are incompatibility. I might be physically attracted to you or our lifestyles might not mix well. Or you might really into alcohol and I’m not. But it’s not a matter of being friendzoned. The reasons I’d reject a friend are the same reasons I’d reject a stranger.

[Marie132]

If I have " friendzoned" someone, it is because they didn't make their intention clear... I am the type of person who is chatty and friendly, because I like making friends... i dont notice if people like me or not... therefore if I'm chatting with someone for a while and they feel friend zoned, it is on them as they didn't make their intention clear...
If someone asks and I say I dont see them like that and I just want to be friends..
That's not the magical friend zone, that people think means it may or may not happen, it simply means I am not interested in dating them... no zone, no nothing... if they want to be friends after, sure, if they dont, then dont

[Melshmallow046]

My default is not liking someone romantically. In fact, I very, very rarely like someone even if they're "logically" a great choice. I think a big part of this for me is that, even if I think someone is attractive looking, it doesn't mean I'm attracted to them.

If someone is in my friend zone, it doesn't mean much. But if you're constantly friend zoned by girls, there could be something deeper like personality. Or just bad luck. If you haven't been on a date yet, don't worry, it just means less breakups before you meet the right person :)

[Rangers]

I wish it were that way, but people are more suspicious that I'm lying or that they're just an experiment to me, neither of which are true but I can prove anything since this is a matter of belief.

[soleil2666]

Mel, you're all over the place with that response. If you look for 'romantic' you are adding 'unreal' to attraction. You don't feel attractive to everyone who is (supposedly) attractive - women very often feel no attraction when they consider they'd be friend-zoned/wouldn't have a chance (female brain is much better organised in this sense, and more spoilt, but it has a lot more trouble with (sustained) focus)
You also look awfully cute, if that is you on the photo 🤗

[D_Bone_Steak]

My dude... chicks friendzone beta orbiters because they like the attention, and the orbiters are 'try hards' because they're clinging to the idea of 'getting a chance' still.

Be like Chad, if he meets rejection, he moves on to the next one until he scores... he doesn't start hanging out, listening to their stupid problems, or participating in basic bitch activities.

Or don't... waste your time, and get dropped like a bad habit as soon as she meets Chad. lolz

[sagevalentineee]

I have a couple male friends who are very clever and nice, we talk occasionally and stuff. The difference between them and my boyfriend is that to him I was instantly attracted, and it only increased as we were speaking. Not to mention, he was not just friendly to me like they were, but it's clear that there is something else there.

[Duckysback]

I don’t friendzone anybody. They do that shit to themselves. I just tell them I’m not interested in dating them. Not my fault they trying hanging around hoping I change my mind.

[Rica_ChicaUSA]

Perfect answer ^

[Alpha09]

Lack of attraction or something else that keeps me from agreeing to date them. I might sleep with that person because there mutual attraction, and I might want to date them. But something about them may stop me from dating them. There are a lot of variables.

[pleasestopthis]

I'm not interested in having a partner, not interested or attracted to him, most of the time both at the same time.
by the way, I dislike the term friendzone. If a guy wants a woman he should stop pretending to be a friend and be honest so he can be rejected or accepted at once. Some dudes put themselves in that situation.

[pleasestopthis]

Also I don't believe every single guy who hangs around is attracted to me.

[Rangers]

The same people who say that say they wouldn't date someone they weren't friends with first😂

[pleasestopthis]

I would think they mean real friends. A slow burn thing, a real friendship that evolves into love. Not a fake ass dude feigning to get into bed. If that's what you're aiming at just be real.

[Rangers]

I do tell them, in plain English that I want to pursue an exclusive relationship with them, if that's what you're asking me. My question is why they opt to friendzone them instead of saying things how they are, you can't have your cake an eat it, too. If you want men to be straight up, it's only fair if women do the same.

[Rohan-Thanekar]

I'll tell u the truth for both man & women,, it doesn't matter if u r being good to them or not,,, u might be a really nice person, but if they doesn't feel anything sexual about u,, them they can't feel that romantic love for u,, & u can't do anything about it

[Syrian_survivor]

Basically because you don't feel that way towards them, they might look great and have awesome personalities but you just don't feel that click, you know?
I did break a heart or two because I tried starting relationships with such girls, I'd never recommend it.

[Rangers]

It's a selfish act not to tell them the truth and separate

[Syrian_survivor]

Not exactly selfish, more like stupidly selfless as I chose to make them happy evem though it didn't make ME happy, I thought my feelings for them would change the more we spent time together in our "relationships" but that was a big mistake, I couldn't love them and it ended very badly.

[joanofarcher]

Well if they are good people who have done nothing to offend me, but I'm just not attracted to them... what am I supposed to do? Offer them a blowjob as a consolation prize?

[Rangers]

No, tell them you're not into them because they don't meet your standards and stop talking to them.

[joanofarcher]

Uh, no. I don't treat people that way.

[Anonymous]

Because some men are not someone who I am romantically or sexually interested in. Some men make great friends, but they are not boyfriend material, get over it and yes, don't believe the bullshit that women can't be just friends with a guy, most of my closest friends are male.

[Rangers]

And how many of them like you? Men and women can't be friends, they're too different and are meant to be romantically involved, not platonically.

[Potatocream]

I've only ever had to friendzone because I didn't feel a connection with them / couldnt imagine a future with them even though they were great girls I didn't want to waste my or their time by getting in a relationship even though I know it won't work out

[serious]

I don't friendzone people because it never gets to that level where I would friendzone them.

I mean I only keep contact with people as acquaintance and nothing more. Friendship is something that simply cannot happen in my life.

[prettyham]

You friendzone someone if you don't really feel a connection with them and you can't see yourself with them in the future and you might be interested in someone else that's why I think people friendzone someone

[Rangers]

It's selfish and narcissistic to lie to someone and lead them on because you didn't want to be honest

[5yrup]

because i'm not obligated to be in a relationship with someone? you sound bitter

[Rangers]

You missed the question completely

[5yrup]

no, i answered it x