I arrived in the us 3 years ago and I’m now 23. I came from a developed country and i speak English with a thick accent, i work as a part-time model and I go to community college cause it’s cheaper and it’s more adaptable with my schedule.
My boyfriend on the other hand is 5 years older than me and he work as a lawyer, we’ve been dating for almost a year , he went to Harvard and unlike me he graduated early while I had to take many gap years because I was working to support my mom before going back to college ( im planning to get into med school). My boyfriend never looked down on me, he always treated me amazingly well even tho we’re different, tells me I’m the prettiest sweetest woman he have ever met, and that I’m his soulemate and I feel the same way about him, but he introduced me yesterday to some of his lawyer friends and one of them was a woman he went to Harvard with. At first she seemed friendly but then she started to make fun of my accent, saying that I probably wasn’t extremely smart for being 23 and in a second year at community college, and that I should probably give up on becoming a doctor, she literally implied that I was probably a whore for being a model, while I never accepted to take naked pics.
My boyfriend defended me ofc and he literally got mad at her. when we were alone he tried to comfort me by telling me that this woman was only jealous because he rejected her when they were studying law, that he loves me and that he doesn’t care about wether I am successful or no. but this woman made me feel so bad cause I feel that I’m not good enough for my boyfriend now. I find this so unfair cause that woman was born in the us and into a rich family, so why did she needed to be this cruel about my situation when we clearly didn’t had the same opportunities?
My boyfriend’s friend is looking down on me, for not being an Ivy League student and it makes me feel extremely bad about my self?
I laugh at the idea of caring what some random fool thinks of you.
Can't imagine how hard your life is going to be if you depend upon the acceptance and validation of strangers to maintain your emotional equilibrium.
Are you going to fall apart every time somebody doesn't like you? That's your plan for life? Might as well stay in your room and play with paper dolls. You're too sensitive for the outside world. Maybe you should coop yourself up in a little upstairs room and never talk to anybody and just write several dozen volumes of poetry or something.
I don't care the pedigree of your degree. All I want to know is can you defend me in court.
The judge and jury doesn't go "oh, you have a harvard degree? Your clients innocent, case dismissed." Doesn't work like that.
Law is law. Math is math. The rules don't change just because you went an ivy league school or state university. What only some laws are allowed to be taught at Harvard? No one else can teach them?
Get out of here with that nonsense. My education is just as good as theirs. I just didn't spend the extra $100,000 for an handed to me job at a law firm.
She’s jealous because she thinks he should get with someone with a similar educational background. It lessens the options for higher quality women and it might not be fair that it takes out the opportunity for similar and higher quality women to date him
I remember a guy who went to Harvard basically low key implied I’m not smart enough to go to Harvard because I don’t go to an Ivy League school currently
The friend was totally out of line and I would not want her around. It sounds like a jealousy thing. People can easily live in a bubble where because they had access to wealth and opportunities, they think they are somehow inherently better. In this case the girl also seems very insecure, a weird combo but a common one. I am an Ivy League graduate and my wife had to leave school after Grade 8. We each have strengths and weaknesses; we chose one another based on many other things.
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Anonymous
(30-35)
+1 y
She's just jealous. To be honest men don't care that much about a woman's career the way women do with men. I can guarantee you that your boyfriend doesn't see it as an issue.
Women like her think that it does or that it should, because they falsely think that men think the way women think. In her mind he should have chosen her because she's a lawyer vs you, because that's how she'd choose between men. But he chose you and rejected her. Men and women aren't the same.
You should have asked her what other languages she speaks. People who judge those with thick accents usually don't speak any language other than English, and they stupidly think that an accent means that you're stupid when you speak two. In which case she's in no position to comment on that.
Your boyfriend's friend can go fuck himself. On three different occasions I hired "Ivy League". Not a one could think for themselves or took any initiative. In other words... useless. I hired a former Navy guy and a former Air Force guy with practical experience with similar scopes and both knew the job far better than the two useless idiots before them.
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Anonymous
(25-29)
+1 y
She probably just wants to feel important for going to a fancy school like Harvard. She’s just jealous because she’s quickly realizing that, at the end of the day, it doesn’t matter when you go to school just that you did. A lot of Ivy League students are entitled so it doesn’t surprise me.
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Anonymous
(36-45)
+1 y
I don't understand that type of attitude. Personally I dont care what type of education a girl has and if she has a degree than I certainly dont care where its from. Here is my advice to you. Find a time when he is alone with you. Then get him to look up into the sky. Lie about see something/cloud, plane, whatever. While he is looking up in the sky, look around you and if the coast is clear punch him as hard as you can in the throat (from the front). don't punch his face, or eyes, or mouth. Aim for his adam's apple. Punch him hard in the throat, once. Tell him that you will kill him if he ever says anything bad about you again. Then turn and walk away. Deny any of this happened. Be nice to him from then on. If he lays a hand on you call the police immediately
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Anonymous
(25-29)
+1 y
Because with all her money, education, etc., she doesn't have what you have - your boyfriend. (And, as your boyfriend said, she's probably jealous.) It's human nature that we judge others according to how we see ourselves. So don't be surprised if she has posed for nude pics, etc.) Focus on what your boyfriend said, not on someone with a hidden agenda (wishing he was with her instead of you maybe).
Graduates of brand-named colleges & universities can be genuine pricks & bitches. Don't let them get you down. Give yourself a pat in the back for pursuing your goals.
Stop beating yourself up over what some jealous "bitch" said to you. Your boyfriend told you how he feels, and you have nothing you need to defend. You're doing great so far. You should be proud of yourself.
She’s jealous. You’re with the guy she wanted. You’re probably hotter than her as well.
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Anonymous
(18-24)
+1 y
Maybe you should work in your accent more and take an accent reduction course? And try to ignore the dbags (I usually mess with them by faking a British accent with a schwa at the end of the word)
Home > Dating > Questions > My boyfriend’s friend is looking down on me, for not being an Ivy League student and it makes me feel extremely bad about my self?
