Aside from not willingly jumping into bed as fast as the guy would like, i believe its because I’m not a go with the flow person. I like to know as much about the person within the first two weeks. Fck flowing just to end up highly disappointed and wasting time. If i dont like what I hear or see, I’m not gonna talk to them for longer than a month. And say i am already dating the person but don’t like where things are going. I’m an Aquarius-Pisces cusp. I’m not big on zodiacs but i agree that we are planners and we start to feel trapped if we’re not with the right person. So I’m not gonna stay with them for longer than 3 months if things continue to go downhill. There’s just too many options in this world to stay stuck with the wrong one. You can’t fix someone who doesn’t think they’re broken. Most people don’t even fully change. They fake their changed ways to KEEP you and then they slowly revert back to their evil old ways when you’re at your most vulnerable. Fck that 😂 I rather have a bunch of short term relationships that I ended with confidence then a lot of longterm relationships i stayed in because i constantly doubted if leaving was the right thing to do. The two longterm experiences i had with that were enough for me to say I’d never allow myself to get stuck in the mud again
I probably do tend to rush things just because I also do not like going with the flow. I want to make my intentions clear, and I want to know where she stands as well. I HATE ambiguity! I'm willing to "go with the flow" as long as we specifically discuss it and we say "This is what we're doing: we're going with the flow.". Because at least then I know what the f***'s going on!
Lmao exactly! But omg i know as soon as i state my intentions and the person goes “no no i like to go with the flow and live day by day”, i know we won't last longer than a month. Those are often the ones afraid of commitment and use that line as an excuse. And they always show those true colors sooner rather than later
Those are usually the same people who are dare devils and want to do crazy adrenaline rush stunts. Theyre usually also the same type who wants to smoke weed as a means to meditate and chill. Screw those type
"as soon as i state my intentions and the person goes “no no i like to go with the flow and live day by day” A few times I have actually done this. But it wasn't that I disagreed with the direction she was taking things in. Not at all. I was just trying to appear "chill" so she wouldn't think I was too eager. Because I didn't want to scare her away.
lack of compatibility, they were only about 80% like me, and differed in a few lifestyle goals (biggest being they wanted kids) and also were religious and I'm atheist.
Because i was young and dated anyone who showed interest in me seeing as it was a rare occurrence. My second relationship was one of convenience yet it lasted several months. My last two relationships ended for similar reasons. The second most recent both were years ago however) ended because i value commitment and decisiveness and the girl would not commit to the idea that we were an exclusive item, i told her she needs to tell me why she won't embrace the situation that was already happening or i would leave. So i left...
The last one was out of the blue and random. She left me after nearly a year of being together. Maybe i waited too long to have sex with her but she knew i didn't want to rush into it but what she didn't know was that i was considering waiting until i proposed to her for us to sleep together. Less than a week after secretly making a ring (yes, making, my friend at the time was a metalsmith) for me to give her, which had the engraving "My soul, my light, my love" she left me and told me she was seeing someone else. I fell into a deep depression, destroyed the ring, tried to commit unalivement (twice), was placed in a mental health facility, became homeless about a year and a half afterward, went back into a mental health facility, lived in my car for 4.5 years and it wasn't til this January that i got a roof over my head. But i still can't afford a computer or internet (currently in public library) so i am very stagnant in my life both personally and economically despite now having a "home".
These are the reasons i have had short relationships. And my destitution led to see the world differently. I was an observer, a fly on the wall wandering and viewing the world from an unbiased lens because i wasn't taking part in it. I leaned women are just as if not more selfish and heartless than men, that if you dont have money you are valueless and that the girl in your life is never yours, its just your turn. I have been completely turned off from wanting to date anyone, though i still desire a romantic and emotional connection. I just can't afford to trust anyone, its too risky.
I’ve made mistakes in past relationships. Not cheating but I’ve acted disconnected and/or leaned on her too much for my personal problems.
But in my experience women are getting more judgmental and making hasty decisions they later regret nowadays. Of course you want someone who gives you are fulfilling and fair relationship. But the grass is not always greener on the other side.
I carefully considered breaking up with my last ex (2 month decision.). When the day finally came I gave her the respect of doing it face to face and being tactfully honest. Just because I no longer felt attracted to her didn’t mean I had a right to disrespect her. I treated her much better in this situation vs how any girl treated me. Looking back from 3 years ago I know it was the right choice despite being currently single and lonely. She had some major problems that would of only gotten worse if I stayed with her.
Oh yea this is a big no no. so many manipulative people out there, people want to slowly open up to someone not be bombarded with questions the first part of dating. Its going to be a big red flag to me if a guy needs to know everything the first few weeks. It’s like chill. And goodbye. basic questions okay. But more important to see the vibe and if the person is agreeable in nature and easy to talk to hang out with. This is more important than their answers to certain questions. Which could be a lie anyway!
Yea but i dont interview them. people just naturally tell you aboutthemselves daily. You have to ask about their experiences though because most can't make up emotional stories on the spot. It helps you to see the person you're truly dealing with
Yea but not everything has to be intense, try and do activities on dates instead of sitting down for food and coffee if there’s too much chit chat. Like fun activities where you both talk about what you are doing than your life per se. Like play mini golf, or if you both have a tennis racket can go play some tennis. Or whatever.
My last previous went toxic and I already was fed up with my toxic ex boyfriend shit. Was blaming my trust issues with some women. It very two different personalities and fake one.
I've always believed that a person's personality and attitude are the top two contributors to the length of any relationship. Genuinality (I like to make up words sometimes) is another. Are they genuinely them? Or are they two-faced fakes? In my prior experience, it has ALWAYS been about genuinality.
Talk yo sh. t queen but for me the times I thought I was in a relationship that mattered I didn't have control of my life so's practically just vanished left province or school eventually just figured this isn't the time to be looking for something permanent.
Lmao i love how you stated that haha 😂🙌 but hey at least you know what u want in life. Like you knew dragging someone along would waste their time. Good for you saying no thanks at the time
I used to love that girl in high school because I could relate to her so much we stared slow at first and when we got together, I rushed too much and ruined it and she broke up with me. Thats it it sucked so much that I started thinking whats wrong with me, I realized that I was over protective and I used to rush things, now I´m wondering how life would be if I realized this sooner.
I should have been more assertive in going for the girls I liked, when I was a teenager or in my twenties. I've waited too long and than it became difficult. My relationships have been very short haha, like one date long 🙈
Because men are fake. They pretend to be all that you want until they get you. Once they get you their true colors show. So now that I've realized how they operate I'm able to figure them out in a matter of weeks and leave.
Yes girl people can't stand when you catch on to em. Some of the guys know theyre fulla shit so they ghost within the 2 weeks themselves 😂 and it dont hurt us like they expect. Theyre the ones hurt and they leave before you can confront them
And they are very conditional and shallow. they don't marry for love they marry for stability, convenience, what works for them (logically) and when their purpose is no longer served they're out
Mine failed because I see the good in people and refuse to believe what I see when they show me their true colours. And they were both long too. 4 years
My last potential one didn't work out cause we were too different in personalities. Additionally she was still recovering from trauma from a previous relationship and family problems so wasn't ready for one.
Some one that love u for u trust me your know don't ever let that person go it's one out a million chance your find that person now or days because of online crap lol I don't know that's what I experience a few times:) ❤️
Yep.. Anyone abusive.. And drama.. And drag you down.. Instead of up. I remember hearing that people like that are really the devil in dusgiuse and it makes sense. They try to ruin and crush your dreams and get in the way. It makes sense if you think about it. Anyone who isn't here for my higher good. Or i just completely dont like them and their lrescence.. They have gpt to go. So much better off without that.
Sometimes I would end it because I would find something about her that I did not like. Other times I would get dumped, probably because I was very moody as a young person.
First one was because he was cheating, second one failed because love for him faded. I'm not that much of a romantic and didn't really express myself much.
im summary because we weren't growin together in order for potential relationships to grow ya gotta grow together and relationships are about control whoever cares the least and is the most sought after has it
like i said as real as i can put it although relationships are about control they're not about injustice dictatorship or tyranny gangster movies are a clear example that relationships are about control i think relationships are most functional when men are controllin em because men generally do the best job of leadin objectively it's really easy to get women to be feminine and submissive provided that ya always value their opinions and are always fair i would even take it as far as to let women do most of the talkin while ya just respond and fill it in with whatevers left truth is women don't wanna lead sex or anything else concernin sexual relationships and i think men should control sex but end it off with women controllin sex for different reasons that way the endin pleasure is theirs it stays on their minds as a result and if ya end sex that way as a man ya can't help but come off as more thoughtful and automatically much sexier to women generally as a result and to me be bein attractive and bein sexy are 2 different things bein attractive to women is just sexual and means ya just look good to women bein sexy to women means ya got intrinsic qualities about yourself that make ya irresistable and relationship material in realtiy nothin keeps women except a great personality but when it comes to superficial things looks would generally keep women longer than status and money would
I like to be in control outside the bedroom. In the bedroom, i like to control foreplay but let him control the sex. I want us to control our own finances as long as he is good at managing his half.
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