She has mental disorders such as "daddy issues" . There is no way that the maturity level of your friend is the same as her boyfriend due to biological and scientifical reasons. If she is under 25 her brain development ain't finished which affect her maturity and personality. This is why young women tend to be naive/immature aka have unstable personality. This is the reason why divorce rate is higher the bigger the age gap is. Any grown ass man in his 30s (eg.) is creepy and has pedo tendencies when he only seeks women under 24.
Furthermore, old men are biologically leftovers because of health and aesthetic reasons. A young man is more attractive, more healthier, and so stronger and can protect his mate which attract women.
The sperm quality is also decreasing the older the men get which means their kids are more likely to have genetic abnormalities.
"Evolutionary Psychology studies suggest that women prefer slightly older or similarly aged partners... Several recent studies have shown changes in male reproductive parameters as a result of increased age. In the current review of medical literature, we found evidence that much older men are more likely to be infertile, women with much older partners are more likely to experience problems during pregnancy, and children of much older men are more likely to have genetic abnormalities. Based on these findings, we suggest that reproducing with much older men does not represent the best reproductive option for women, which would explain the female preference for only slightly older or similarly-aged mates. sexual selection;mate choice reproductive behavior; ..."-
Here is a statistic below that shows that women prefer 1-5 years older men and NOT old men
Old men can't have much common with much younger women since the maturity level ain't same due to brain development that affect the personality and maturity level of the young girls as I said. Brain development continues till you become 23-25. So it is not healthy relationship and there will be also a power imbalance since young girls also dont have much adult life experience and because of brain development as i explained.
I will get hate but i dont care. Guys should wake up and should give up the hollywood dream of young girls that like old men. If you like young women date them as soon as possible before you get old since majority of women like men in their mid or late 20s (who are biologically in their prime) and NOT old men.
I would date an older man if we were on the same page. My only issue with it would be noticeable generational differences, which is why I usually stick to partners no more than 15 years my senior. A 46 year old had similar experiences to me (he would be version 1.0 and I would be 2.0, sitting on tail ends of roughly the same era), whereas the people I meet in their 50s seem from a different one entirely. Not everyone, but there is a pretty big technical and cultural gap between people who remember the 60s and 70s and someone from the 90s and 00s.
So for me itās more like, do you seem too much like my dad? Or are you 55 and act very much like my generation due to an extremely adaptable personality? Itās the same with people from very different cultures (eg. with strict religious views). I canāt change who I am for anyone and no one should change for me. Sometimes the differences are just too vast.
So theoretically I would date a much older man. but will it happen? And would they date me? Lol. Another issue presents itself!
On average women trend towards dating men about 4 years older than them. I think a lot of it has to do with the fact that women tend to date at or above their own socioeconomic status and men date parallel or lower (on average).
This is probably to do with the manās relative level of accomplishments in comparison to younger men as well as his maturity. Younger guys are still needing to prove themselves and show some markers that they are on the path to a stable career and it might be seen as a riskier bet to get serious with a young guy who hasnāt made any real achievements yet (like owning a house/car or other socioeconomic indicators).
Men tend to prefer women who look youthful and put less emphasis on the womanās accomplishments so are generally willing to date a bit younger as long as the woman is interesting to talk to/easy to spend time with. Neither are hard and fast rules and women do date younger men sometimes itās just less common.
As for why a woman would go for a much older man itās probably mostly to do with relative economic stability, he can provide a house and a safe environment for her where she doesnāt have to grow up and take responsibility for her own finances etc so can remain a bit more carefree. If she comes from a background where money was a constant stressor that caused her parent/s a lot of grief itās easy to see why that might be a priority for her.
Well because he's likely more mature, experienced at life, and has resources (lets be honest most women love $$$). As for myself, honestly I've come to the realization I can't be with younger women. I dont have the patience for them and their lack of maturity in many cases. I dont like to tip toe around something. I'm very direct and sugar coating isn't for me. Also younger women seem very, very flighty. very quick to trade up, divorce, cheat, from my experience. I need someone who has their head on straight, seen the shit the world has to throw at them, and then become humbled and realize that laundry list of demands they had for a guy was all BS and didn't matter.
Do I want kids? yes. Will it be harder? yes. Are their options opened to still having them with the right person? Yes. Science has come a long way and if all else failed surrogacy is on the table if you honestly found the right girl for you to do that with. Older women aren't demanding the spotlight, they actually share it with you and give back in the relationship. Out of all the girls I dated my age or younger I've NEVER experienced that once.
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Just because there's an age gap doesn't mean the relationship won't work.. And maybe she was trying to point out that you didn't marry a much older man yet your relationship ended in divorce.. if you want to help your friend, you should be a supportive friend instead of trying to push your views of right and wrong onto her and her relationship. If it works for her and she's happy, that's what should matter as her "friend"
u "It is a recepy for desaster."
Older men usually have their shit together.
They think older is better. But then, I too also like older women. However, I've resigned myself to the fact that I better take a woman my age or a little younger if I want to have a family.
That's actually sad, to me. Since I was 19, I have always preferred to date "older" women... even when I was an Active-Duty in the Marine Corps. The reasons for that preference are simple.
ā ~ They act like adults!
ā ~ They usually have wider hips, (instant boner-fuel).
ā.🅰 ~ It's real easy to give women over 40 an orgasm.
ā-🅱 ~ They also tend to cum really hard, when they do.
ā ~ And older-women are infinitely more interesting & enjoyable to talk with.
Example: I was 23, and had a something real with a 52-year-old. Truth-be-told, she was unbelieably fuckin hot, but still, an absolute pleasure to spend time around. And (again) I wasn't exactly 'lonely' back then, and I don't have some weird fetish. The point is (finally, I know), That women are just like men, in the way they improve A LOT with age. As for looks; I find laugh-lines sexy, and, as long as she is moderately toned (in the important places), a 50-something can just completely own me. The sad truth of the matter is... ā WARNING TRUTH AHEAD ā ... women are more harshly judged by OTHER WOMEN, rather than men. I swear, age-discolored skin is no match for how good pussy feels to a guy - and that IS NOT EVEN THE BEST PART of an older woman, anyway... (even though it really is pretty damn good)... but NO WAY does a woman's body give me the most pleasure; It's really not even comparable to how amazing just being alive can feel with the love, affection, and attention a woman comfortable in her femininity. I actually suspect, if I ever get to go to my own personal Heaven, then - all joking aside - I'll bet there is a woman waiting there; and will fill that ideal role of being bot a source of empathy, as well as satisfying my deep urge to protect something vulnerable.
So, with as fucked-up as the 'social' world is today, give here the appropriate cautionary tales of the possible future, and just let your friend enjoy her life. One thing I can promise; A 20 year-old guy will not know the right way to treat a woman... unless maybe, that guy is a U. S. Marine ;)
Iāve tried dating men my own age. They are immature, still living at home with mommy, arenāt financially irresponsible and in my town 99% of men under 25 are āparty boysā who spend all their time and money out with their friends getting wasted.
I like older men because they have gotten over the party boy phase, they are financially mature, have their shit together and can normally hold down a job. They are also more honest and better at communicating than guys my age, and older men usually have no desire to fuck around with lots of women, most older guys want to find someone to settle down with. Which is exactly what I want too.
Thereās men out there who think younger women only want them for their āmoneyā, even though said men donāt really have money 😂 sure there are gold diggers out there, but there are also women who genuinely like older men and donāt use them for money.
My partner is 9 years older than me and he is the best person I have ever dated, and he is also the oldest person Iāve dated. Heās great at communicating, heās mature, heās not some loser who spends all their money on drugs or alcohol, heās not a cheater, and he can financially support himself the same way that I can support myself, so neither of us have to rely on the other for money.
First of all that was very low of you to tell her that about her relationship, thanks for your concern for her but let HER figure that out if itās true or not for her. Thatās her relationship she CHOSE to be with him and get to know him. My parents have a 12 year age gap and theyāre doing just fine together and havenāt divorced each other.. theyāre about in their 60ās now so that should explain a lot to you. Some relationships with huge age gaps work and others donāt it just depends on their level of maturity and understanding. Instead of focusing on her life and just listening to her, focus on yourself my love I know with you mentioned about her mentioning your divorce and ex (youāre both basically projecting your own insecurities maybe even experiences onto each other) which that was pretty low of her too, just focus on trying to heal because I can tell that as soon as she mentioned that she basically hit some buttons so distance yourself from her and give yourselves some space so you both can heal.
I donāt think you need to worry about your friendās age requirement for men unless she is younger than 21. If she is, there is way more wrong with the scenario youāve described. However, older men tend to match the energy you are putting out. Therefore, however your friend is reflecting her intentions to him is how sheās going to be treated. Iāve dated older men (after dealing with men 0-4 years older than me) and it was quite fun! Some wereā¦ honestly rather lame; but, that can happen at any age. Older men do tend to have an air of experience and stability yo them. They also tend to be less likely to make reckless mistakes or cause emotional damage that comes with figuring who oneās self is.
The fact of the matter is this, though: You wouldnāt be satisfied who she was dating if he werenāt doing exactly what you expect them to do. Which is whack. She isnāt dating you. Have an opinion if you want to, but sheās going to do what she wants. Sheāll also learn whatever life lessons she needs to.
I think you shouldn't judge other people's relationships as a friend if you love and care for them it may be a shock at first but try to respect their decision if they're happy.
I will say this though I'm someone that would prefer to date older not because I have daddy issues but because in my experience I lack compatibility with people my own age.
I didn't socialise with kids my age and when I did they were quite devious.
I do find their are some older men that are just creeps but some that actually want to have a long term relationship. They just focused on their career before settling down.
And no I'm not a gold digger.
I have a great appreciation for lots of different things sometimes I find younger folk see it as me being a snob or a show off or weird.
Instantly older men see me as their cuppa tea!
Well, first of all, they probably don't exclusively date older men, and perhaps they want to for the following reasons:
-older guys usually appreciate younger women more than younger men do
-older guys have more life experience
-some women simply feel more comfortable with older guys
And, sure, sometimes it's just about money.
It's not clear to me why her dating a much older guy is such a "recipe for disaster". A relationship with someone her age is also unlikely to last for a very long time.
At the end of the day, we date individuals, not an age. We date for compatibility, and biological age and maturity levels don't always correlate to chronological age anyway.
A 40-45 year old man is generally not on his deathbed, so what exactly is the problem with her dating one?
Daddy issues and unresolved psychological complexes, or just lust
As you said these relationships don't last. I don't see what someone may have in common with someone 2 generations apart
Personally I've always preferred guys my own age or, up to 5-8 years older or 2 years youmger
Old guys on this site like to think they're hot, but in reality I doubt they look like George Clooney
for me, i found dating older men is for me. My man is 19yo older than me..
I have stated my opinion before:
- Older men are not focused on their own Pleasure. They want the woman pleased first. Foreplay is important to them. They know that a "happy" woman is more involved in bed and enjoys it more.
- Older men are financially stable, have a job, a place to live, a car, etc.
Younger men:
- Only care about their own orgasm.
- Treat women like property.
- Expect you to tolerate their stupid video games 24x7
- Don't care or know what foreplay is.
- Want me to pay for their stuff.
etc.
I have dated over 50 men until i met my guy. 60% of them were over 30-40yo.
I dated guys my age in HS and after. They just dont get that women have Needs, Feelings, and need attention.
Girls mature faster than boys. Girls usually begin puberty around age 11 while boys begin puberty around age 12. Girls usually end puberty around age 16 while boys usually end puberty around age 17.
This means that for most of their adolescent years, girls are used to the concept that they are more mature than boys their age, and if they want to find a boy at the same maturity level as them, they need to look older.
Now even though puberty is over by 17, I'd still argue that girls remain more mature than boys at the same age level until at least their mid-20s. Given that, it makes sense that women prefer older men. Maybe not twenty years older, but the motivation remains the same: women are looking for something they can't seem to find among their age-level peers.
At 63 I am single by choice and happy living alone. I just spent the weekend with a 40 something female Attorney. I also see a 30 something American Airlines Flight Attendant and a 30 something local TV news reporter. I don't hide anything and all of them know I do not date exclusively. Every one of these girls has been burned badly by men closer to their age and has told me they feel comfortable being around me. Since I now fire blanks they have the added protection of not having to worry about an unwanted pregnancy. I'm not sure why the OP has against May-December relationships, but honestly, I would highly recommend leaving this friend alone.
this thing usually happen when they missed their father figure on their childhood time , the father can be non existent , or work all the time so he has no time for their kids
later , those girls grow up and they are seeking for something that missing
OR , to put it on simply , we can call it daddy issue
Theyāre mostly a whole package.
Iām dating a dilf heās 40 (he looks like heās in his late 20ās😂) and iām 22. Better conversations with almost everything, probably cuz he knows whats good nowadays. Well duh overall he turns me to be a better person with all the patience and lectures he gave me. Teaching me a lot of things, i wonder why he is so kind to me. I used to think that i donāt wanna take him seriously cuz i thought he was just playing with me but you see... Heās still here until today with me.
Big age gaps like the one you mentioned and them being together is usually because the man makes good money and she milks him for it.
#2: Younger men don't desire your friend so her options are very limited so she goes to the older guy who usually desire younger women.
People may deny it but it's reality. No pretty young woman dream and prayer is to be with a man that can be her dad or grandpa.
thing is, you dont need to understand or judge... its about personal preferences and if you dont want an older guy yourself then thats fine but its also none of your business what other consenting adults do... to that end, do yourself a favour and dont stress over it.
Older men are generally more settled economically and emotionally. And they are more experienced with sex. Why would someone not appreciate that?
Your post sounds more like you're jealous that your friend has found a good guy. Please stop complaining and feel good for her... and go find a good guy for yourself.
I prefer men older than me but not old enough to be my dad. My dad is 26 years older than me so anyone who is 20+ years older I would not even consider.
I like boys that are around 5-8 years older than me. I tend to be only attracted to boys 5/6 years older so theyāre generally 28/29 now.
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