So I was cheated on, and reacted very badly. Like raging and stooping to a new low in response. How does this message sound to the guy?

[Anonymous]

(Not looking to fight anymore, just want to move on)

My message:
I was demeaning in my response to you, which was a step too far for me.
I do not wish to react or behave as someone I am not.

In my outrage of anger, I wanted you to feel bad for your actions, and convince you that what you was doing was wrong, and wrong for so many reasons.
I wanted you to feel my devastation and anguish. However, a big part of me believes you don't acknowledge the part you played in this and so my efforts are truly futile.

I sympathise that you are unable too, or are infact unwilling to, communicate what it is you need and feel. I do not wish to analyse or unravel the reasons behind that. But I do know how difficult that can be. As I always thought, it is something that gets easier with more practice. And the most uncomfortable conversations are infact the most important and most telling

Desite everything, I have no ill intent. I do not wish to continue the confrontation.
I do not regret how I feel, but I do regret how I responded because I was unable to contain my hurt

[Finchie40]

The fact that he cheated on you is your answer to end it and move on , I know you are hurting and being cheated on is one of the worst feelings to go through especially when you give someone your heart and they turn around and shit on it , So what you said in your message to him his fine , but honestly from my point of view you gave him to much , I m not judging you what so ever , but for
Your sanity from here on out just give him one word answers if he tries to reach out to you , make it clear to him it’s over , what he did to you is a selfish move and he is a piece of shit , so you need to value yourself and realize you deserve better than that , do not give him and leverage to think he has a chance on getting you back , the best thing for you to do to move on is make it clear to him that he has no chance in hell to try to con his way back to you , When my ex wife cheated on me , my whole world crashed before my eyes , and I got so numb hurting that she could do that to me after all I did for her , the only thing I could do for my sanity was to not give her any leg room , I made it short and clear that she doesn’t have a chance with me considering she tried getting me back begging me for forgiving her , even though I was hurting badly inside I made it clear to her it’s over and that I will be fine without her , by me doing that ate her alive , she made every excuse in the book to why she cheated on me and pretty much told me it was just sex , that she had no feelings for him , I just laughed and said what a crock of shit , but whatever it is you aren’t the girl for me and I walked away. The thing is we all want to be loved and wanted by someone we gave our heart to but when someone can take advantage of you and only really cares about themselves they trul don’t love you they only like the convenience of you , if someone can’t sacrifice for you in a relationship then they shouldn’t be in a relationship period , A cheater has no right being in a relationship with anyone cuz they only care about themselves , so move on from that piece of shit I find someone that will stand by your side

[DCooper]

What you did wasn't inappropriate. The other woman deserved to know what she was getting into.
As far as a message, the clearest message and the best way to convey it, is simply to block, ignore, and never acknowledge his existence again.
Investing any energy into communicating with him sends the qrong message in my opinion. Cheating should mean automatic and instant exile from your life without a second thought.

[Anonymous]

Don’t say anything. If you need to respond and put this much thought into it, it means you aren’t moving on from this guy and you’re going to get caught up in his bull shit for a long time. Delete his number and move on. There’s nothing to say to him.

[Drumlin2001]

Without knowing him who knows how he'll respond. He may not even read it. But hopefully it was cathartic for you to right it, give you some kind of closure

[Fireguy17]

Good message, my thought is to add something to the fact that you will be moving on and not looking to get back together.
You wouldn't want your message to be misconstrued.

[bowenw]

You did what you thought he deserved at the time. I'm not sure this message to him is necessary after what he did.

[Asker]

Yeah you're right. I haven't sent it him. It was good ti just type how i felt

[bowenw]

If he messages you, you could send this to him.

[Asker]

Which

[bowenw]

Sorry, I meant what you wrote in your question labelled "My message". If he gives you a hard time, I wouldn't hesitate to send it to him.

[nawtee_me]

While justified, your actions are not who you really are. Anger changes people. Forgive them and remember that forgiving does not mean forgetting. It allows you to move on.

[Anonymous]

He deserved to be demeaned, so I have no idea why you would apologize for that.

[Anonymous]

What is the point of saying all of this?

[MrCommodore]

What did you do?

[Asker]

I contacted the woman he was cheating with an told her the extent of our relationship. Which later screwed his plams to meet her an she was appalled an shocked to learn about me

[MrCommodore]

Well done, fair play to you, you did the right thing. I thought you maybe did something illegal, like burning his car, but what you did was fine.

[Asker]

Nah, I'm not crazy. Even if i get hurt, I still rationalise he consequences. For me, this girl needed to know incase she had full on invested in him

[MrCommodore]

What about you now? I mean how are you coping? Are you finished with him or looking to give him another chance?

[Asker]

I am not sure. I think finished. It is hard to rebuild trust you broke

[MrCommodore]

Yeah once trust is broken, it difficult to rebuild.
I don't know your situation with him, if you were in a relationship with him or a friends with benefits type thing. Once a guy cheats and particularly if he cheats multiple times with one or multiple girls, I'd say the writing is on the wall. Move on, otherwise it will happen again.

[rebeliouse]

i dont get what your asking