I (f19) am a horrible girlfriend to my boyfriend (m24)?

[Anonymous]

I just hate being put last. I'm a horrible person for crying every single night before falling asleep. I feel stupid for feeling lonely because I know my boyfriend loves me , but I hate only texting at night because of how busy his schedule is. I feel bad that we can't ever really see each other during the week and it has to be late at night because of his schedule and I have to pause my homework and my studies. I wish sometimes that I wasn't such a drag and that I could be okay with all of this but sometimes it's just completely overwhelming. I know I'm a horrible girlfriend, I'm sorry for the rant I just feel so lonely and emotional and I'm sad. I don't know what I'm looking for really, but I just had to rant and type it out somewhere.

Updates

+1 y

I feel horrible for feeling this way and I hate being selfish but I just hate it all sometimes. Half of the things in my room are gifts from him which makes me feel really sad and lonely because no amount of gifts is the same as having him with me. Because I'm so introverted sometimes its so hard not to feel lonely. I just feel bad for being a huge pain

Updates

+1 y

I’m not allowed to meet his friends and sometimes it feels like he chooses work over me. Especially times when we don’t see each other for a couple of weeks and cancels on a date last minute to go out for drinks with coworkers of his who I technically work with too but they’re in his department. Sorry for the rant I’m done for the night I just feel uptight but thank you all for listening

[Telekinetic-Potato]

If you feel that way and he actually loves you then it's because you need to work on yourself. Not on a way that should make you feel bad. You just need to find your purpose in life. You're probably at the perfect age to start this journey.

And when your younger this is going to be much more common. Especially since young men don't usually have as much experience managing their time as young women seem to.

But the fact that you won't see eachother for weeks at a time and he will cancel plans last minute shows that he probably isn't very attached to you. He might not even realize it.

If I were you I would tell him he's got one chance to change. I would ask him if he expects anything from you. If you ask him to change you need to be open to hearing something that might hurt you too.

And if it doesn't work out after a few weeks, it's probably time to move on.

[SkipPerk]

How old is he? Can he email you from work?

is he in a key position (new business, new client, up for promotion,…).

career-oriented men will always be busy. That said, I cannot believe he does not want his physical needs met. Can you meet him at his place? Move in?

I am often busy, but one must make time for sex

[SnakeBoop]

Erm girl.
The fact you think you're last screams volumes and that it's NOT YOU that's a problem.
Red flags.

[IMuser]

Breakup. Rather than suffering, end everything.

You can hold on because you will feel guilty but with time, you will start resenting either yourself or him. Some things should be ended asap so that you can have peace of your mind

[TheMajesticKing777]

I think you have a case of lack of communication, tell your boyfriend how you feel, perhaps y'all can come up with solution, maybe a small video chat every now and then might make you feel a bit less lonely.

[NamerOfStars]

I don't see much that's horrible here; just someone wanting more time and attention than the other can afford to give.

[RHK36]

Sounds like the relationship has run its course and you should consider moving on. He doesn't have enough time or doesn't want to adjust to make time for you.

[Anonymous]

Sounds like neither of you are ready for a relationship. You’re emotional and needy and you boyfriend can’t balance his schedule enough to spend time with you and instead throws money at you in an attempt to keep you happy.

[Opinion Owner]

After you calmed down and updated with something that wasn’t an emotional rant, he’s a bad boyfriend who has been using you. End the relationship.

[LaNc3L0TT]

Why are you horrible girlfriend?