Should the first date be somewhere expensive?

[jasco]

I recently saw some tiktoks about this and how a lot of people seem to say that its basically a price tag to take a woman out to eat at a expensive restaurant or something like it on the first date. Ya know they also say that women have expensive taste and that men who can't pay for it shouldn't try to be with these women. To me that says that I can buy you, which in turn makes you a object and people general don't usually care about objects unless it has some value to them. My question (s) is, is this way of thinking flawed? Is this how a lot of the women of my generation think? Why or why not? What should men do?

[OlderAndWiser]

For me, a first date is usually a dinner at a nice restaurant, but I never view it as me purchasing the right to spend time with the woman. I choose a nice restautrant where dinner for two will be $60-90. It is good food, nice atmosphere, no one ever takes their crying babies there, it is quiet enough for good conversation, and the restaurant has a nice lounge for an after-dinner drink. I am just trying to make it a good first date and I don't think spending that much money entitles me to even hold her hand (but I am always hoping that I will at least get a goodnight kiss at the end of the date.)

[razelove]

That really depends on what direction you want things to go from there. I'm usually all for somewhere public like coffee shop, bar, park, museum. Basically somewhere you can talk, spend time with each other, and either one of you can leave at any point if you aren't feeling it. Go for a girl with expensive tastes or give her a habit for them, that's the direction it goes.

Granted I don't mind taking my wife, or a girlfriend out for an expensive date, but not someone I'm just starting to date. They don't deserve it yet.

[Little_Bumblebee]

Personally, I prefer if the first date is low-profile and inexpensive. The first times you get to know the person.
I prefer not to put a lot of expectations and pressure on the mood and the feelings.
I find that stupid to go to fancy restaurants with someone you hardly know - save that for an anniversary with someone you love.

On first dates, I prefer to go for a walk in the park, go mini-golfing, or to the zoo, etc.

[yucychan]

I prefer the first date to be somewhere where both and me and my date are comfortable. Where we can know each other, talk and laugh to our heart's contents.
I don't really like it if my date brought me to a expensive restaurant. Because I will feel pressurized.

[exitseven]

I always hated that pressurized feeling when I was dating.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

No, it shouldn't have to be...
I'm sorry though, this fixation on who should pay for the first date makes people look so petty.. Both women and men...

[Lliam]

No. I would never take a woman to an expensive restaurant for a first date. I'm not planning to propose to her. It's just a first date. But I'd still take her someplace that had good food and decent ambiance. I mean like someplace cute, preferably not too bright or loud, where we can sit at a booth. It could be Italian food or burgers or something.

The evening should be casual but still worth getting dressed up a bit for. I want to see if she put any effort into looking good for our first meeting and if she is dressed appropriately for the venue.

I used to know some great, inexpensive places in the Los Angeles area when I was dating.

[exitseven]

I used to think of interesting, fun dates that were not terribly expensive. I took a girl to one of the tourist trap areas in the city. We walked around and looked for a restaurant we wanted to go to. They were all overpriced places that served little portions. We ended up at an Italian grocery store that my father used to take me to. We bought sub rolls and cold cuts a bag of chips and a couple of cans of soda. We made sandwiches and had them by the ocean. Some people walked by and asked where we got the subs.

[Anonymous]

Men have bought all of this on themselves by adapting to the bs that women keep throwing at them. They lower their standards and put up with all kinds of crap just to get into the sheets...

When a man pays for the date, and a woman does not. He is telling the woman that her time is worth more than his. Expensive first dates are just for men she's not that interested in. Chad isn't dating her, he isn't paying for expensive restaurants. She breaks all of the rules for the Chad, and let the other suckers pay full price. If men had any sense they would simply stop dating... it's one sided.

[Cherry234]

I don't expect a man to take me out to an expensive restaurant on the first date. If I'm just getting to know him, even a coffee date is fine. More expensive dates can be saved for once I get in a committed relationship.

[AviatorTom]

It should only be expensive if you want to impress your date with how much money you have. The first date should be somewhere where you two can get to know each other, money aside.

[SynthKobra]

Fuck no. You’re getting to know a person and your time is valuable. If she can’t accept that and demands an expensive first date then you have dodged a bullet my friend. Like the matrix

[zagor]

No, that's BS. A woman who pulls that is trash. I've usually dated women with good careers who often make more than I do, and they don't do that crap - we meet for a casual snack and/or drinks.

[josephinelcajon]

No it should be in the day and very public. Lunch and a walk, picnic at a park.

[Anonymous]

I don't mind paying, but I won't be spending a ridiculous amount of money on someone, when I haven't even decided if I like them yet.

[Slim57]

Absolutely not, if she wants an expensive first date she can get ditched