Why do women get so offended by men who won't date women they are not physically attracted to?

[DanielDiaz]

I did not reciprocate the advances of a woman I work with. I did not find her attractive, neither physically nor metaphysically. She responded with, "I know it's because I'm not an Amazonian Goddess."

Another woman at work complained to me about guys approaching her. "They want me for my body, they don't want me for me." I had but one response: "You would prefer men not find you physically attractive?"

She wasn't expecting that question, because she was unable to answer it.

Ladies, what are you expecting from us? Women want what they want. So, too, do men want what they want. Is that unfair? Do you really want a guy who does not find you physically attractive?

Guys, were you ever in a relationship that failed because her personality and other qualities did not overcome your lack of physical attraction for her? How did you overcome this if you stayed together?

[BullShark]

I'll give you a simple direct no bs answer; it's because these women aren't used to taking no for an answer, especially from men.

Now before anyone pulls out their torches and pitchforks, let me just say that this does NOT include all women. Just a certain spoiled percentage of them, and that there's still a good number of women who aren't like this. The thing is that most self-entitled girls who later grow up to become such Karens have almost always had guys lining up to cater to their every whim, beck and call so they're used to the attention. Remember the unapproachable and mean "popular hot girl group" from your high school and college days? Bingo!

But then these girls realize that as they grew with age and have no redeemable qualities to them besides their wild card "hot looks" from their teenage and/or young adulthood days, which are now diminishing and they've STILL not been able to land a successful relationship now that they're crossing into their thirties, as the hot guys have all moved onto more hotter younger girls and the nerdy guy (s) they rejected coldly back in high school and college don't want to give them a second glance now that they're successful and well financed; they turn into THIS. They consider their good looks as their most prized quality. Their personality however, not so much.

"How DARE he say no to me? ME!! And go for Aqsa instead? What's she have that I don't? Any guy would kill to have me, and Sami here thinks he can reject me! Whatever. He's a limp-dick loser anyways."

All I'll say is, if a guy doesn't find you attractive, learn to take no for an answer, work on your shortcomings and move on.

[KrakenAttackin]

@BullShark. "Just a certain spoiled percentage of them,", yeah like 92%.

[Chazmatazz269]

You used “metaphysically” out of proper context.
Men are considered pigs for having standards. We’re supposed to just be happy any woman likes us at all and fall all over ourselves when any woman expresses interest. Every single connection is meant to happen on a woman’s terms. You get together because she wants it. You stay together as long as she wants. And it ends when she wants it to end. If a man asserts his own desires or intentions anywhere along the way and they aren’t directly in line with hers, he’s a pig. There’s no exception to that rule. You can examine every heterosexual interaction throughout all of modern history, and this will prove true.

[DanielDiaz]

I did not use "metaphysically" out of context. I used that term to describe my lack of attraction towards her in the abstract. In other words, there is something about her that transcends sensory perception that does not draw me towards her.

I agree, though. Some women can be very angry with rejection, and don't consider that men have their own autonomy over what they consider attractive and unattractive.

[Chazmatazz269]

You DID use metaphysically out of context. Your fabrication doesn’t fit the definition, no matter how you stretched it. You might be able to fool dummies with that nonsense, but not me. I’m a word nerd.
There’s no shame in being wrong. You don’t even have to admit it. Just improve and move on. But don’t be afraid to check yourself, and don’t fucking lie to a word nerd! Ell oh ell!

[DanielDiaz]

Okay, my good man. My apologies for using a word in the same context as those who speak about the interpersonal relationships among other human beings. My bad!

Misused words aside, I completely agree with the rest of your sentiments.

[AmandaYVR]

It's just a defence mechanism. I wouldn't put too much on it. And not all women react or think this way.

It's easier to think that a guy doesn't like their looks than their character or personality. One is easily put on the other's preferences, and one is very, very, personal and involves major internal armwrestling to resolve.

If some guys didn't hopscotch women so much, jump around from one 'piece of ass' (as some say) to another, then girls wouldn't feel so insecure about the importance of their looks. Guys, in part, created this situation.

[ballparkdogg]

its the douche bags that make the rest of us men look bad.

[AmandaYVR]

@ballparkdogg That's right.
Yet we see a lot more anger from men toward women, than toward their peers. You should check each other more.

[DanielDiaz]

@AmandaYVR

"Guys, in part, created this situation."

Women are attracted to men who can satisfactorily meet a level of criteria that warrants being rewarded with a "piece of ass." Meeting women's collective criteria (which is not always malleable) of physical attractiveness, emotional/social intelligence, masculinity, assertiveness, sexual prowess, sophistication, intellectual acuity, charm, charisma, wittiness, abundance, ambition, extracurricular interests, and philanthropy, are all EXHAUSTING standards to satisfy. For many men with a base-level appreciation for the cost-benefit analysis, undertaking the mind/body wracking of meeting these standards—which are conventionally seen as desirable by virtually every woman—then he is going to satisfy his own hedonistic impulses and hopscotch every "piece of ass" who rewards him for satisfying said criteria.

If he exhausted himself to be seen as attractive by women, why wouldn't he reward himself for doing all the work of self-improvement women demand and have liaisons with every woman who is willing to have sex with him? Women are no more entitled to monogamy from any man than men are entitled to any physically-attractive woman.

[FictionalCharacter]

As a woman I call guys out who spew bs like “personality is more attractive than looks” pffft, please. You’ve been doing the opposite forever asshole.

[ballparkdogg]

its a package deal. looks and personality.

[DanielDiaz]

TBH, if a woman has a personality that I find repulsive, her physical attractiveness is negated. Conversely, if a woman does not have a physical appearance that I find at least reasonably attractive, then her personality cannot compensate for lack of physical attractiveness. I don't have any shame admitting this, because women have the right to do the same thing.

[DanielDiaz]

@ballparkdogg

Agreed. Both must be present, otherwise I am coping and settling for her. Do women really want to be settled for?

[Anonymous]

Women don’t know what the fuck they want. Even if they think they do they change their minds once they get it. Having a girlfriend or wife is like a second full-time job. You have to keep them happy. According to them it’s happy wife happy life. But sometimes that equates to a miserable man. It should not be a man’s responsibility to make her completely happy. Only she can do that. She’s she’s got a lot of infilled dreams or anger issues or whatever the case may be she’s not going to be happy. As a man you try to make them happy but always seems as though they’re miserable about something, especially as they get older if they don’t have a man. Bitter at men, at you get women as well cause that boat has now passed for most of them.

[Pegases]

Women are going to go after the men they find attractive. They aren't going to go after men that they don't like. So the only logical reason a woman would suggest that you settle for women you aren't attracted to, is because they are insecure. You go after what you like, and let whoever has a problem w it kick rocks.

[Anonymous]

I don't know.

Maybe because their society says being "plus size" aka fat, is ok and attractive.

And when reality hits, it's not ok, it's not usually attractive.

It shatters their confidence and for them, men are wrong for not being attracted to them because they have been fed the BS "plus size is the new sexy" thing..

[Avicenna]

She was unhappy about being rejected.

It’s very hard to be with someone you don’t find attractive. But not impossible.

[Jamie05rhs]

Because they spend their whole lives getting told that they're beautiful. So reality comes as quite a shock when it hits them in the face.

[KrakenAttackin]

You should tell HR about both conversations before the women file a complaint.

[DanielDiaz]

The first woman has issues with pretty much everyone at work, but somehow has not been fired, even after multiple complaints to HR and management from multiple people. I make every effort possible to avoid her. The second woman is not as unlikeable as the first, but she still has her issues. I just got annoyed with her complaint and called her out on it.

[notwoke]

entitlement constantly offended mentality/culture