Does anyone understand why there is such an imbalance in dating these days?

[lilyanony1]

Men and women seem to want different things, there are more men talking about being dominant and trying to assert that while more women don't seem to value men at all.
The disrespectful behaviour that occurs between men and women while dating is at an all time high.
I don't really know where all the decent ones are...
It feels like society is on the verge of imploding.
I don't want to trigger a ranting session, but it would be nice if we could discuss what is needed for a change...

[Lionman95]

I think the biggest problem is the diversity in goals. Because back in the day you dated for marriage nowadays all people seem to have different goals and there are different methods to get there.
Because I would at least 50-60/70% of boys grow up without female friends and real deeper contact to girls that are not their sistsers they have literally no clue what girl could want from them or a what girl wants from a relationship.
So instead of spending time with girls they use the methods that are more comfortable meaning they use social media and other internet ressources. There they find guys like Andrew Tates and dating coaches and because these people seem successful in what they do they use their methods.
Though guys are generally dominant there is a difference between acting jerk (Andrew Tates) and being the guy that takes iniative, that plans, that knows what he wants, is settled and can the lead in a relationship without being a jerk.
The problem with those guys that none of those coaches is interested in how you get a long-term exclusive relationship but instead their main program is at least in my experience to give you the feeling you could get any girl and to boost your self-confidence until you´re a jerk.
The biggest problem I constantly see is that society is changing and guys have problems to adjust. Because it´s any more the case that as a guy you´re the breadwinner and provider since women oftentimes make the same or even more than a guy.
So for guys there´s a lot of confusions what women actually want from them especially since we live in a highly individualistic day and age where it sometimes like every woman wants something else.
I think the main problem is that many if not most guys don´t know what a woman wants at the same time women are disappointed and equally confused about guys hence they don´t seem to get what a woman likes.
But because both sexes take a lot for granted from to the other one it´s not working out at the moment.

[love_conquers_lust]

Lots of reasons. I was taught to be nice to women. The issue for me is that promiscuous women literally and figuratively make me sick to my stomach. I fooled around with one skank in my life and puked the next morning. Sluts aren’t for me, neither is promiscuity. So if I, as a guy can do it, it baffles me how weak willed girls can be. I was under the impression your gender had a better moral compass than mine, apparently I was wrong for a lot of them. I’m more wholesome than most of the damn women in my family.

Fuck this equality shit. Physically, most guys can beat the ever living shit out of most girls. Ironically, growing up as a kid, because girls grew faster than us, it was them who beat up on us. But fuck, we didn’t care, it was just fun, we didn’t hold grudges. But then hormones kicked in, then we started to surpass them in size, then things…changed. And now, it’s like women are pissed off this is the arrangement for the rest of their life, they’ve forgotten how we got here, like brats.

Mentally, the playing field is more even. Modernization has rendered physical labor not only a very underpaid job, it has increased demand for mental labor. The major problem for feminism, modern life, equality, all that shit is hinged on a limitless supply of cheap and abundant oil, and it’s not. It’s very finite. I keep hearing reports of different women in different professions constantly underperforming compared to their male colleagues and still complaining about pay. They’re going to have one hell of a time in a world without oil. The joy ride would be over if oil ran out.

So really it’s money pissing people off, and envy. Feminism is going to have an extremely hard time surviving in a world without oil. So will diversity.

[love_conquers_lust]

God. I can really rattle off a lot of shit sometimes when I reread my replies.

[dustybiker]

A few select men who were once quietly angry about modern woman thinking for themselves were stirred up by a certain individual, and since been publicly loud about it. No difference from before. Their recent volume just makes them easier to avoid in the dating pool. But in reaction this has made woman a bit more defensive.

Just observation.

[MzAsh]

Women are raising their standards and becoming more selective. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-state-our-unions/202208/the-rise-lonely-single-men

[OlderAndWiser]

You have extreme feminism/wokeness, and a reaction against feminism and wokeness.

[lilyanony1]

Yea but wheres the middle ground... These extremes are far too much.
Maybe it's just the calibre of person I'm meeting... I met a man recently complaince manager or something, educated doing well financially but for whatever reason it didn't change him from being a dick!
He was totally into telling me he's a dominant guy and effectively started "teasing" me asking me what I was up to and just to be able to tell me he wasn't available to meet.
After the second time I just ignored his messages.
But I'm meeting a lot of guys that are like this.
The honeymoon period doesn't actually flourish because people don't really know how to go with things and enjoy it. Everything is calculated and manipulated.

[OlderAndWiser]

I can't speak for other guys on this. I understand that most women are not extreme femenists ad they simple want equal opportunities. I don't assume that women are hostile towards men or at they are wild animals that need to be tamed. I just look at them as potential equal partners.

[DarkWinterNights]

Society IS imploding. Take a look around at almost anything. Relationships, friendships, the death of the family, crime skyrocketing, politics is no longer annoying, it’s cancerous, the United States is on the verge of civil conflict, there is war in Eastern Europe, multiple viruses making comebacks, the slow collapse of global trade and the liberal world order, multiple economies are on the verge of collapse, housing crisis, runaway inflation, faith in our institutions and our government are at their lowest levels recorded, everyone hates everyone else.


Kind of makes you wonder how everything fell apart so fast.

[lilyanony1]

It's so sad but unbelievably true there is massive unrest

[NathanDavis]

I keep it very simple...

I cannot fix others, certainly cannot fix everyone else, so I never tried... would never try

I can only work on myself and better up myself, which I've done, which I do all the time

and then, I've been always patient to just wait and give it time, till someone else who has done the same for herself comes along the way

for all others out there being a mess and bringing a mess, I usually keep my distance

[lilyanony1]

Best way to be. Right now it's just me and my puppy... I really can't be asked with all this nonsense it's too much

[Cuddlekisser]

Warning. Unpopular opinion ahead!

Unfortunately I think the human species is that way. It is just an asshole species. A few decades ago kids have been teached to be nice or else!!! That's why all the bad genetically programmes behaviour was actively hidden and not just shown.

Today kids are being teached to be themselves. I just wonder why do people complain now? Delivered as ordered.

To be more constructive: It is like alcoholism. First, you have to confess that you are having a serious problem (that nearly every human is just an asshole) and then you can work on it.

[RealMarek]

It feels like society is on the verge of imploding because... society is on the verge of imploding. Every major culture goes through various stages. When they decline there is always a sort of feminism that rises and at the same time fertility rate drops below replacement. The West is not exception and, in fact, seems headed for catastrophic collapse much like the Greco-Roman culture before it. It happened before. It will happen again.

[Jacobbbb]

The imbalance you're talking about sadly isn't gonna go anywhere. The internet's ruined dating for a lot of people. At this point you just gotta hope to find the diamond in the rough and cherish it once you do

[Anonymous]

If it looks like a duck, quacks like a duck it's probably a duck. Go on to ANY dating website and read a random woman's dating profile odds are it starts out. "I'm just seeing what's out there". So already from the get go she's saying you can message her, but she's not really taking it serious. Can't imagine why that's turn a guy off 🤣. Then she let's you know she's not trying to hookup with any guy. 🤣 I haven't even said "hi, my name is..." and she's already talking about sex. 🤣 And then then she typically goes on to say all of what's wrong with men today. 🙄 You read about 20 profiles, half of them reading like that and it gets exhausting.

In short, I'm a happy person. So many women are filled with so much anger and resentment that I PERSONALLY have nothing to do with. Sorry I'd rather be single than be with someone who is that way all the time.

[fastongaspedal]

I think it has a lot to do with people are generally declining. They are worried about what other people think. Instead of being with the person that would ultimately make them happy they back pedal. Worried about what friends and family would say they go with someone that fits other peoples
Vision of who they should be with. They have no vision of there own and if they do they have no back bone to stand firm and go with it.

[MikeInHawaii]

Decent men are out there. They may not be 6’ 2”. They may not have BMW’s. In fact decent men may be the ones that realize a depreciating asset is a waste of money and have IRAs, 401(k) s, stock portfolios or own homes. And they are probably the least willing to pick up a $100 bar tab.

[mr4435669]

I did not know that in the United States there are dominant red pill men, it is something that makes me happy, I hope that thought reaches that trend in my country. The war of the sexes is beginning, it is something that is predicted in the behavioral drainage.

[ShaTTeredMasterpeace]

I feel like there has always been an imbalance. It's just highlighted these days. There's drastic changes between what men and women want anymore.

[lilyanony1]

The imbalance was that men were in power and controlled everything. But now there is more equality the value of the individual gender has reduced dramatically.
We are resources for each other.
I don't even think people even really consider sex they way they used to, I think it's more a way of satisfying a bodily function. But the deeper connective value is no longer there.

[ArtemisSilver]

Is it? I think there's still a lot of well adjusted women out there.

[lilyanony1]

Well adjusted? What does that mean?

[ArtemisSilver]

That said I'm pretty tired of women flirting with me only trying to get me to sign up for their only fans.

[ArtemisSilver]

Like not crazy

[Zolly99999]

It's the internet.. it blows a lot of things out of proportion...

[lilyanony1]

😑 So how do we work this out exactly? The Internet isn't going anywhere at all. And in this current climate nothing seems to be going "right".

[Zolly99999]

I don't have an answer for that.

[lilyanony1]

OK.
Thank you for responding anyways

[Zolly99999]

I can only control what I do in my life.. I have no control over other people.

[lilyanony1]

I understand that, I wouldn't expect you to do any different either.
But what do you want?

[Zolly99999]

I would like to see equality between men and women...

[lilyanony1]

What does that look like to you?
I just heard that a law was passed in cali, that if you are gay you can have sex legally with a minor as long as you are not more than 10 years older than the minor...
What's that all about please?

[Lenell]

Media programming.