Why do I always obsess over things my boyfriend does?

[Anonymous]

boyfriend and I been together for three years, good guy and has been loyal from what I know. Now I have trust issues dating way back and I have been trying to work on them since he’s stuck by my side with all my trust issues and problems. I always have this urge to look through his phone to see if he’s cheating, he lets me with frustration then he won’t from time to time to enforce boundaries. When I look through his phone I find nothing so I move on to trip off “well he’s 29 and he’s not that sexual with me and obsess over that even though that’s not true then I will stress over well why doesn’t he pick up his phone what is he doing. I feel like I always find something to worry about and it’s killing me and him and I am wondering if anyone knows what this is called and if they did the same how did they overcome it?

[Guy13]

You got it exactly. You do not trust hime for whatever reason. YOu need to work out your own issues and stop hoping from relationship to relationship. You most definitely do not need to be dragging a man down into your deep black hole of insecurity and distrust.

[coachTanthony]

He's either a good guy or he's not. If he is then maybe take a look at your own life and figure out what is missing. Many people tend to gravitate to the person they are seeing to fulfill their every desire in life and when that doesn't happen because they are on teir own path and mission you start to wonder what's up when in all actuality it might just be you with nothing going on that is of importance.

[bkcutie11]

I have insecurities i did this. I just hurt myself in the end. I didn't find that my man is cheating necessarily but I found he wasn't over his ex. Texting her she's amazing and he misses her. And lots of pictures of her. .. anyway. I've learned that you don't have to spy to know if someone is really into you. They'll prove through action and how they treat you.

[SexyRedd1966]

You're being insecure.. you need to get to the bottom of that or you're going to keep running guys away

[MenGuru]

Stay off social media. Encourage your man's happiness. Social media has you thinking less or your man. If you can't. Then leave and get with a man who really is cheating on u so u can have a reason to be upset !🙏

[dragoblack]

It's called being so used to asshole cheating exs, you dont know how to handle a good relationship. Literally go to therapy and find a mental psychiatrist that can't help you undo that toxic defense mechanism and paranoia

[MenGuru]

No it's not. People like you are the reason she is the way she is. She is a follower. So she lets social media dictate how her relationship goes. Which is why she can't understand that instead she comes to social media to ask like minded women who have the same problem.. whats her problem. Lol before social media was a thing and men and women had flip phones with no cameras (Altell ) we didn't have these problems bc social media wasn't telling women how to behave or how to view their man's happiness.

[Iron_Man]

Your insecurities and you’re paranoid

[Jmmmfi4]

He's definitely gonna wind up leaving you