Horrified, does he genuinely mean it?

[Anonymous]

Been with this guy for nearly a year in March. He calls me everyday. We're pretty much inseparable, we talk everyday, message constantly and spend most days together each week. Anyway, he called me saying he regrets not inviting me over earlier. He said we both love spending time with each other, by which I agreed, I said yeah you know I enjoy our quality time. Anyway, he goes onto say that he worries about spending so much time we as he is uncertain with how the future will progress...

He told me he has feelings for me, that he cares about me and he thinks about me all the time. He then turned around and said but I don't love you... like totally ot the blue. The whole conversation was so lovely, this totally seemed random to drop in there. Then he was like ohnim only messing, I'm just joking and he seemed pretty panicked to withdraw what he said.
I just laughed an said that seemed pretty harsh to blurt out

Anyway, over the weekend he said 'you think I love you' and then another day he said ' i think you love me'. Why does he keep saying these things and going on about it?
Is he trying to seek some reaction out of me? I feel he likes a reaction but I don't know why

If I turned around and said yes or no, would he stop?

What am I supposed to say, is this a game?

[Anonymous]

I just noticed this comment '... getting jealous about my ex giving Mr his laptop I still use to this day.'

That laptop holds his energy, soul ties and a link to the past. I see that as a redflag. Therefore if you are still using that laptop, still inviting that energy and soul tie into this new relationship then you are unaware of the damage this can cause whether the boyfriend realizes or not.

'.. or wondering who got me the Teddy I have'

Again... this is another problem.

'He does seem insecure and I do think he wants to push down the feelings he has'

What you see as insecurity could simply be his subconscious being alerted to those things I just mentioned. Many women are unable to leave the past 100% where it should be. If you can't do that 100%, do not expect him to commit fully 100%. if you think the things I mentioned are unimportant then that will also be part of the problem...

[Asker]

I understand what your saying but this is a guy who accepted a birthday balloon of his ex this year. Knowing full well I didn't like it. My Teddy has no emotional attachment to me. I just like the Teddy. The laptop has its function. I never loved my ex because it wasn't deep. I'm not the type of person to have sentiment in an object.

[Opinion Owner]

By accepting the balloon from his ex he's keeping the past alive while disregarding you and continuing to create new soul ties. By you voicing your lack of acceptance without enforcing the boundary is sending a message (that you don't love yourself enough to enforce the boundary) and regardless of the laptop's function, it is still a soul tie that keeps the past alive. Thus both of you are doing the same against each other in different ways. One is doing it more consciously, and the other slightly less consciously. Therefore you have ego involved instead of ascension.

[ShiftingMonke]

Hmm. It's very contradictory. If I had to guess, he's starting to develop feelings, but he doesn't want them. By saying those things, he's creating a kills killswitch for the relationship without actively ending it. I think it's a very gross form of emotional manipulation.

[SnowedIn]

^^^^^^^^^^^^ this.

[ShiftingMonke]

@SnowedIn from the great sage himself, he only speaks in truth. You're like my GaG underwire. 🤣

[Asker]

Kills killswitch? What do you mean? Sorry never heard the term. Yeah I think he had developed feelings and attacment. I can sense it and see the way he acts and looks at me, it's just too natural. You couldn't fake the way he is towards me. Even getting jealous about my ex giving Mr his laptop I still use to this day, or wondering who got me the Teddy I have, so he got me a new one. He does seem insecure and I do think he wants to push down the feelings he has, but this is purely based what I've seen and how he's spoke about things. I could be wrong but I just get a gut feeling he can't accept feeling this way towards me, considering I go against what he wants - different stages of our lives, I'm in a different job to him that isn't as good etc. He wanted specific things and I'm totally different to those things he wanted at this stage, but he's also said he's never gotten on this well with someone so I don't know. Maybe he is conflicted because he didn't think I'd offer him much but emotionally and romantically I do. He is judgmental and pretty much concerned about job status, achievements etc etc

[SnowedIn]

@shiftingmonke..."GaG underwire" lmao

[ShiftingMonke]

My apologies, it was a typo, I just meant "killswitch". In this context, he's laid out that not only did he understand your in love with him, he is not and won't allow himself to be in love with you.
With these seeds in place, the relationship will inevitably fail abs he will blame you for getting so invested. He told you he wouldn't love you, remember? Do he will move on, not an ounce of guilt, while you're left feeling bitter and used.
And why would he leave you? You're taking good care of him, devoted amd caring, going above and beyond for emotionally nothing in return. It's a good deal for him, minimum effort and maximum reward.

You're free to pump this emotional well as much as you want, but it's been dry this whole time.

[England4eva]

Sounds like he’s insecure and wants to be the one getting chased. It’s a risky game to play if it is one.

[Anonymous]

GO TO HELL