Why do I not feel attracted to men that I met in RL but still wanting a boyfriend?

[TheSimFans]

The men I do meet in real life don't typically appeal to me, but I'm still in search of a boyfriend, and I don't think most guys my age are interested in long-term relationships, which would just like to have some fun. In addition, the meetto movement will make it difficult for me to find a boyfriend in real life. Now I'm stuck in waiting mode and I don't want to. Yep i'm single. Men do approach me but seem friendly then all i see are friends and nothing much. I hada horrible previous relationship i been in a toxic prevous relationship got 9 ex boyfriends all my previous relationships ended up with breaking up. My mum is going to be a problem with me when it comes to dating men because I can only date men with a learning disbities What do you think about my problem of not being able to get a boyfriend?

[CaptainOverthink]

I think it might the case, maybe, that you're focusing too much on it. You're being goal-oriented, when really all you should be doing is explore life and when it feels right you go for it.

It's like going around with a cookie-cutter trying to fit anyone inside of it instead of taking the time to find out what shape of cookie they thrive best as.

Sometimes having tunnelvision on that goal will stop you from seeing the potential infront of you. You might need to ground yourself and explore what's in front of you more closer.

As for finding men that want long-term relationships, you know it's very common for women past age 20 to date up, way up, like 10 years up. It's not wrong.

As for me2 and all the shifts in society the last decade.. it's just something we'll have to live through. Just keep exposing yourself to different environments, other types of men will be there. You know, not everyone cares much about me2 and I think the bulk of the issues it caused is fading as it totally backfired as a movement.
Now we all just have to provide the space and support to learn from our mistakes and move on.

[TheSimFans]

@captainoverthink my type of my guys are short me, nerds, shy guys and they all going to be at home. i'm not going to find guys like that in rl. i also like guys that are gamer but other women is red flag for guy to be gamer. is not for me.

[CaptainOverthink]

I'm sure some of them are out and about as well. Not all gamers just play games indoors. It could be anybody really.
These men are out there, but most might not feel up to the task to approach women. If they are mature then they might just try to be friends with everyone and just waiting for that 'click' moment when they meet someone.

You could also go to conventions, boardgame-clubs or similar places where nerds might hang out.

The nerds that never go outside are choosing lonelyness, there's very little to be done on your end for them.

But maybe you shoukd try aporoaching men, because these men you like, they might not.

[TheSimFans]

@captainoverthink. I do apporching men and so far i been rejected by more then one men or men that i met are already in a relationship or gotten a girfriend when i was at the youth club. i been other places to. still not sure about any men there.

[CaptainOverthink]

Then I guess you're on the right path, it's just a grind to find the right ones.
And that you give them a chance to get comfortable with you, itherwise you won't see them as they are.

[ManOnFire]

You and I are in a similar boat. In real life most women around me aren't very interesting or appealing to me either, even when they are attractive. I think you and I may be looking for specific kinds of partners, and have very specific kinds of needs that most everyday men/women are probably not going to meet. But I think my struggle is maybe more difficult than yours because I mostly like women of other cultures, and those really do get me going, but the struggle in that is that we tend to be different religiously. It's a tough world out there.

[TheSimFans]

@ManOnFire I can only date men with learning disabities on because whar my mumd said so and my mum also said is has be moderete leanring disabties. my mum is only is very strict with me when comes to dating. i also has try online dating but hasn't go nowhere.

[ManOnFire]

I don't fully understand what you mean. Are you saying you can only date men with learning disabilities because you have one?

[TheSimFans]

@ManOnFire yep i do have a learning disabities and can only date men with moderete learning disabities since my mum has become even more stricter with only me when comes to dating none of my two sister any isuse with me they date who they want to date , one is older and one is younger but might also has a learning disabities to and she can date who she want to date.

[ManOnFire]

Well, I don't think you have to be restricted to just men who are the same way just because your mom says so. That's not fair to you. Plenty of men who don’t have learning disabilities would still date you.

[TheSimFans]

@ManOnFire that is the promblem that my mum refuse to listen to me about what i want but always going to be herway or i can't date or be in relationship at all. what one my say other times is will be
silent treatment what my mum only me. i even ask two my sister has no isusse with my mum at all. so is only me and she is also rubbish of dating advice and same with my dad to old fahison dating advice.

[ManOnFire]

Mothers can be very controlling and manipulative. And they have a tendency to play favorites with their kids. I understand how difficult it is to deal with that. Best thing would be is that you stop telling your mom about what you want, and show her that you can do what you want and bring home a guy who doesn't have a learning disability and still likes you. That will be proof that she's wrong about you.

[BasedBaeBecca]

It's completely understandable to feel frustrated about your dating situation and long for the companionship of a partner. However, it's important to remember that you don't need to rush to find a partner.

It's also possible that your feelings of dissatisfaction come from unresolved frustrations about the past relationships that ended up with breaking up. If you haven't already, it might be helpful to reflect on those past relationships and what you learned from them.

You can turn to your friends and family members for support and advice while you take some time to focus on yourself and build more confidence.

[TheSimFans]

@BasedBaeBecca. I don't have many friends. I just saw them just friends. I do see a point of having the best fast. It also have a toxic friendships.

[BoopBoopBeep]

If you recognize that friendship as toxic why do you keep it? That's a huge red flag for men.

[TheSimFans]

@BoopBoopBeep i didn't want to keep them think first before reply next times. they kept begging me to be there friends and kept saying no,

[BoopBoopBeep]

@thesimfans
Words have meaning. Think first then type. If you're going to be snippy at least be correct.

You wrote: "It also have a toxic friendships." Now maybe you aren't a native English speaker, so nobody's faulting you, but that sentence is present tense, indicating that currently you have a toxic friendship.

Shocking that you don't have a boyfriend.

[TheSimFans]

@BoopBoopBeep you should also read first and think some thing are very dispecful for words like now. snippy i wasn't even snippped. two is was auto corrent. i was from stupid england. so English is my native specker. some other reason people not good at English . there is other reason people user here has meation people could also has a learning disabities. now you are being insensitive.

[TheSimFans]

think to.

[BoopBoopBeep]

@thesimfans
It's okay, wherever you're from, but no native English speaker would say "some thing are very dispecful for words like now", just so you know ;)

[TheSimFans]

@BoopBoopBeep I was born from england is that better then. you are just being very disrespectful for women with a learning disabties that i did meation just now. i also hate English. i can speck English just fine.

[BoopBoopBeep]

@thesimfans
You started it when you came at me with "think first before reply next times"... I was being polite before that. Dish it out but can't take it, eh? Learning disability or not, not my concern, you get in life what you give. Work on understanding that and maybe you can get a non-disabled boyfriend since you seem to think that's the way to go.

[TheSimFans]

@BoopBoopBeep nobody started it. second i can't even get none dsiabled boyfriend. so you not chaning at all. you kept putting the blame on me but is not me that started it the first place and you will be report it. don't reply or else.

[BoopBoopBeep]

"think first before reply next times" was starting it. That's an incredibly rude statement. Now you're butthurt that I'm not bowing down to you but treating you like I'd treat any other normal person and you want to report me. For what? Treating you the same? Have at it child.

[WhitneySnow]

It sounds like you have a picture in your head of the kind of guy you want but the guys you meet irl don’t measure up

[Ali4Sy]

I think you have always have faith that you and your soulmate will find each other someday.. no matter how many boyfriends you'll try but be sure eventually will be with someone in a relationship without breaking up...

Each person may have a lot of failed relationships, you don't know when is "the one" will be there... So just don't let yourself give up...

And I wish you good luck 🍀

[Bl0n6eguy]

Men act friendly because ever since #metoo it became abundantly clear we can't be upfront with our interest without knowing she is open to it.

So a large population of younger men play coy and wait to see if she is into us; if she choose to play hard to get she will play herself - because we're not going to risk putting our neck under the guillotine while blindfolded and hoping the blade is a pillow...

[LogicBomber]

You (like most women these days) have their expectations set to unrealistic levels.

goto www.igotstandardsbro.com

and see how unreachable your standards are.

[TheSimFans]

@LogicBomber I'm not from USA so that was very much pointless. i'm don't like women types that like strong men or loud men i hates these type of me. would prefer to be with a gamer or nerd. yep i would prefer to be with short men over any tall idot men. i'm from UK

[LogicBomber]

Well that site will still give you a basic idea of if your standard are over reaching.

[TheSimFans]

they seem to be realistic but many i can't find since they not going many men left and they die first. i also can only date men with a learning disabilities that has be moderate learning disabilities.

[slatyb]

Sounds like you are looking for love in all the wrong places. Maybe you should try to find some new groups to hang with.

[TheSimFans]

I can't even find in groups

[TheSimFans]

I already tried new group and no guys there just older men

[glennos89]

You already have 9 ex boyfriends af your age? 🤒🤯❌

[kakaling]

So, a tall and handsome man is not appealing to you?

[TheSimFans]

yep if i said in my detial i never be attracted to any tall men or handsome men.

[EaterPeter]

You might be in love with boyfriend image you have created and no guy might fit that description

[TheSimFans]

I lose all hope in men so. i don't even think of anything part from games

[EaterPeter]

Feeling a sexual?

[TheSimFans]

Nope i don't want to get sexual and that also red flag i don't want to have sexual relationship and just long term. no sugers daddy.

[EaterPeter]

Feeling asexual?

[TheSimFans]

nope don't feel that also

[Staximus]

I don't understand the "I can only date men with learning disabilities" thing

[balyai]

Move to a different place

[TheSimFans]

i did thst and stil didn't get attracted to any men inrl so