Why do men refuse to believe that women can be casual with a man and not catch feelings?

Question

I have had a few casual relationship and rarely if ever get attached to a guy.

dynamicyandere · Accepted Answer

Men are conditioned all their life to be more stoic and not show emotion unless that emotion is anger.

They’re taught by society, other men, and women, to keep their feelings from showing, to suppress them all.

(This isn’t healthy, and people eventually break. That’s one of the reasons why suicide rates among men are almost 4x higher than women.)

Then men, looking at women being free to express their emotions and seek emotional support see women as ‘emotional’ and see men who are raised to suppress their emotions as ‘unemotional’.

Then this philosophy bleeds into other areas of life.

Some men then believe that only men can have sex without catching feelings but not women.

But life is not black and white like that.

Everything and everyone falls on a spectrum.

And even if that phenomenon is common, doesn’t mean it’s true for everyone.

Like, not every guy loves watching sports, drinking beer, or working on cars.

Women can enjoy sports too, women can enjoy beer too, and female engineers are a thing.

And women who can have casual sex without catching feelings aren’t unicorns. They exist.

Yeah, they may not be the majority. But they definitely do exist.

Not believing they exist is like not believing that there’s such a thing as a tomboy.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

What if I said that both men AND women simply just shouldn't "be casual" with each other... essentially, what if we just erased and eradicated hook-up culture?

The world would be better off, and we'd restore the respect between the sexes, and each other. Why not, huh?

The sooner that people come to realize this, put their immediate, selfish urges to the wayside and simply embody what it ought to mean to be a grown adult, again... the world will be better off. How about we all get to know people? Stop putting so much pressure on everyone to give you what you want, when you want it? Treat people with respect... How about it?

It starts with me. It starts with you. It starts with everyone, individually... if everyone just did the right thing... deep down we all know it. Just do it. Respect your fellow human being.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Same here. I usually keep 3 or 4 boytoys to play with. Otherwise I’d probably be married to my dildo by now. Treat them like a Dildo and everything will be fine.  And if you think you’re ready for something serious. Cut them all off, dress decently and that’s it. Someone will marry you. My sister got married and she was the biggest SL—T. 🤷🏻‍♀️ Men want women. It’s not like you can’t get someone hooked at some point in time. Only the basement dwellers want to say that you can’t get a relationship. It’s only those creatures. INCELS. Sexually undesirable incels. Incels who haven’t seen a real p—sy in person.

mandyfire98 · Accepted Answer

I've never fallen for a casual thing, ever. I don't catch feelings just based on sex. It can be just pure lust and physical. Same way i don't fall in love with my dildos.

Falling in love with someone requires so much more.

OlderAndWiser · Answer

Maybe you aren’t like most women.

Alli39 · Answer

There's this public perception that all women need strong emotional, specifically romantic, connections in order to enjoy sex. Obviously that's not true for all people, but it definitely influences the way society interprets men and women in casual relationships.

Kaamraj · Answer

Simple biology, a woman risks far more in a sexual encounter than a man. A woman risks potential pregnancy which may be life threatening for her and the child if the father doesn't stick around. Yes there are women like that out there, but they are in a minority just like men who wouldn't cheat is given the option.

Losalt · Answer

I think those guys are wrong about it not being possible.
I've had several female *friends* who aren't anything more then just that, *friends*.

That said, they're not *entirely* off with that sentiment.
Friendships between men and women do have a tendency to lead to something more as one of the two usually is hoping for that.

EricSummer · Answer

They could just as well believe it. In "friends with benefits", if only only one of the two falls in love it is the woman in 80% of the cases, but the guy in 20% of the cases. This already excludes the "successful" friends with benefits in which nobody falls in love.

It depends on the person, not ultimately on their gender. For example, I get attached fast and cannot have casual sex.

marish01 · Answer

The very idea of casual sex grosses me out and I'm happy for it.

Being able to bond is wonderful.

Having sex with someone you have no feelings and can't have feelings for means there is something wrong with you.

Nothing to brag about for sure.

Nikki1989 · Answer

Beats me, most of my friends are males. I think a lot of men have been brainwashed by what they read online and have no real world experience to go on.

Quigly · Answer

I prefer the friend zone, I really don't understand the use of the word refusal.

I think any guy that's been in a relationship and understands the problems with relationships evaluates his life and decides that if he isn't really looking for kids or just not right for him that the friend zone is the preferred place to be.. But, that doesn't mean that I hate women.

Anonymous · Answer

I have had casual relationships with 3 different women and in every case she caught feelings and it ended up very awkward when I didn't.

The answer to your question is because men know that most women are not like you. You are definitely the exception to the rule.

ProbablyClueless · Answer

Because any man who has any kind of experience with women can rattle off a laundry list of situations where women have claimed they could keep things casual and then ended up getting super weird.

Billlewis · Answer

Guys often have a hard time believing that you're capable of having a casual sexual relationship with a guy without becoming emotionally involved.

lightbulb27 · Answer

it's not what we've experienced. its likely true for a minority, not the majority. even so, what emotional issues lurk and are being done that are not being conveyed in that statement

TheSpaceGnome · Answer

I don't believe that women can't be casual with sex. I do however view people who have casual sex as idiots that are doomed to singleness and disease as they get older.

RingOfFire · Answer

Because people see things from a perspective of how they feel themselves. Guys are always horny for girls, and they're not too particular about what girl, so they assume girls are the same.

WhitneySnow · Answer

It happens. But a lot of times girls do catch feels (not always though).

Anonymous · Answer

Most men's experience with most women who claim they can do this, inevitably results in "So what are we?" conversations followed by "Is this enough for you?"

LazerBean · Answer

A lot of them do believe it, that's the basis of why some men don't what women who sleep around.

Taffy1234 · Answer

This is so common, and that's what makes this site so great.

MementoMori777 · Answer

They do? I know some catch feelings but I kinda always knew both genders can fuck and avoid feelings

DarkLegacy · Answer

I guess it is because they hve had experiences, women are more likely to catch feelings but they can have something casual with a guy.

Gramkabir · Answer

What not to believe? Women are mostly casual with men... Like they go out or hang out with guys or even date guys without having any emotional attachments.

sheikalana · Answer

Cuz that's what's been said for years and years and they believe in such misconception.

Anonymous · Answer

Because most of us want somethig more. That's just reality.

ginger_snap · Answer

I personally have had 3 casual s cual relationships and have not gotten attached.

Friendlybro79 · Answer

Not all men refuse to believe this. Some prob do.

peedy · Answer

Because you have feelings for everything a women's mind operates on emotions how something or someone makes her feel

Anonymous · Answer

Probably for the same reason women can't believe that a guy can be interested in a woman and not want to have sex with her.

BigDog1989 · Answer

Because they can't. They may say they can, but they really can't

Staximus · Answer

I've met plenty of casual hose beasts in my time

DerekC321 · Answer

Maybe they just don't want to believe it, even when they know it's true.

Anonymous · Answer

I don't care, I'm not interested in women who are not virgins.

FunkyMonkee · Answer

I didn't know feelings were a disease.

BarryLiverstone · Answer

Based on patterns of the past. Also science

In_Trance · Answer

Because sooner or later, it happens

Ryfyle · Answer

This is pure projection.

Akam93 · Answer

Who knows.

Why do men refuse to believe that women can be casual with a man and not catch feelings?

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Why do men refuse to believe that women can be casual with a man and not catch feelings?

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