What do you think about guys who date multiple women but they don't want a woman to date other dudes?

[Anonymous]

[MrOracle]

I think women are the ones who enable that behavior by dating men they know are dating (and banging) other women. Lots of guys, and nearly ALL of the guys who are really attractive, and thus extremely entitled, are going to bang every girl they can, and not apologize for it. Women, not men, are the gatekeepers of sex, and if women choose to sleep with guys who are sleeping with other girls, that's on the girls. They chose their situation, and when it goes bad - and of course it will - that was also her choice.

Women don't put up with that stuff with guys who aren't extremely attractive, so they have the ABILITY to set boundaries and expectations and to discern who is doing what - they just choose to look the other way when it's a hot guy, because they think that they'll somehow be the girl who makes him give up all other girls. Then they have the audacity to be shocked when that doesn't happen...

[Asker]

What are you talking about girls be sleeping with some ugly ass dudes and be putting up with that type of stuff.

[Unit1]

Right on target!

[Chthou95]

They don't realize that women share higu value men

[Chthou95]

High*

[Momma-404]

Yes!

[Juxtapose]

This is exactly right!

[Darkrainbow]

Bro i know men who aren't attractive but constantly cheat on their girlfriends or wives with prostitutes 🤔 yeah of course that's prostitutes fault. 🤭

[MrOracle]

@Darkrainbow I didn't say that hot guys were the ONLY guys who cheat, just that hot guys are almost always cheaters. The main thing that's common among ALL serial or on-going cheaters is that they are entitled and self-centered, and generally have low morals. MOST men aren't like this, but there is certainly a percentage who are.

Most girls SAY that they choose men based on their morals and values, but in most cases, that's a lie - most women do zero investigation into a man's morals and values until long after she's sleeping with him, and many women go out of their way to avoid learning about his morals and values because she finds him attractive and specifically wants to avoid finding any reasons not to date him. Often she finds him attractive because he's handsome, but sometimes it's because he's confident, or because he's "exciting" (meaning: dangerous).

[Darkrainbow]

I believe this isn't a good way to approach the topic. The idea is that women avoid good-looking guys and choose less attractive ones to prevent having a cheating partner... But why? I understand that if a man is good-looking, other women may be interested, but it's ultimately his decision whether to cheat or not. Moreover, an unattractive man may also have desires to cheat and engage with prostitutes. 🤷 I think it's not solely about appearances. As I mentioned, I know many guys, even a 5.2 ft guys I know constantly cheats. 🤷

[Darkrainbow]

I was genuinely interested in a man who is 5'2" and not particularly attractive. However, after learning that he's a player who approaches many girls simultaneously, I started acting uninterested without giving him a reason. Eventually, my interest faded completely. Perhaps in his own perception, he believes women don't choose him for various reasons, such as his height, wealth, or not being in the top 20% of men. 🤷

[MrOracle]

@Darkrainbow Obviously it's a man's choice whether he's a cheater or not - but you cannot deny the fact that the VAST MAJORITY of men who are really physically attractive choose to cheat. Partially because they constantly have women throwing themselves at him everywhere he goes. I've seen this happen myself.

I'm not advocating for dating trolls, rather, I'm advocating for PRIORITIZING morals, values, and life-goals, instead of prioritizing looks, which is what most people do. And, yeah, that probably means that you're going to get guys who are relatively average looking, maybe a bit above average, rather than guys who look like movie and TV stars, but average-looking is not at all the same as a troll.

If you (i. e., any woman) don't prioritize morals, values, and life-goals, there's a sub-1% chance that you'll ever find a relationship that can last - it's a virtually guaranteed way to fail. Yet, that's what most women (and plenty of men) choose to do.

[ProbablyClueless]

Sounds like a recipe for disaster, but I suppose people want what they want.

The way I see it, if you're upfront about your boundaries and expectations, and you get someone else to agree to those terms; how I feel about that relationship is irrelevant. You know what you signed up for.

[BlackBeauty90]

Your question is worded wrongly.

It should be what do you think of desperate low self-respect/esteem women who stay with an unfaithful guy.

Which IS exactly the situation. If such women grew a figurative pair of balls and said no way loser am I staying with you then men would stop doing these sorts of things. Even a child understands cause & effect. This is cause & effect.

Man cheats - woman boo hooes but takes him back.
Man cheats with 2 woman now - main girl cries & eats ice cream but takes him back.
Man cheats with 3 woman now - fool cries & eats 2 tubs ice cream & takes him back. .

Decent women with self respect & self esteem would've tossed the guy onto the curb along with the rest of the trash the first time he cheated. But many other women sob & snivel... and rather than improving their lives keep on accepting the trash back.

So he keeps doing it, why change.

[Nikki1989]

Some men still believe it is fine for men to cheat, but totally disgusting when a woman does it.

[Asker]

That doesn't make any sense why be faithful to someone if they aren't faithful to you?

[crmoore]

I don't recall the post saying he's cheating.

[Dserfs]

@Nikki1989 it is disgusting when women do it because how do you know who the father is?

[Darkrainbow]

@Dserfs well she can use protection and also dna tests exist. And for women's aspect it's also disgusting if ur husband have children from another women.

[OlderAndWiser]

Guys like that make the rest of us look pretty damned good!

[Vegasrunner]

@OlderAndWiser TY

[TheorionMage]

Its an atavistic animal 'throwback' attitude like a buck deer amassing their 'harem'...
a psycho prestige thing--- amid his peers He's a 'stud' but society labels her 'opportune' or a 'slut'. In reality, in modern society 'hooking up' is an audition interview

Pragmatically, he's sowing his genes amid fertile 'does' ... but wants assurance that the progeny are REALLY going to be HIS. That's the REAL underlying logic behind NOT using condoms; ... not this "But Babe, I'z can'z feels YOU" bullshit!

He seems to have no problem finding space in his wallet for that stud-ly 'little blue pill'!

[EricSummer]

I can understand that the guy would not want his partners to sleep with other men. However, I cannot understand the women very well. Fortunately, most women value it highly if a men commits to them in an exclusive long-term relationship. This can allow a man of otherwise moderate attractiveness to have a surprisingly attractive woman.

Of course, if a guy is exceptionally hot the woman might think that having a part of him is already great. For example, in evolutionary terms it might make sense to raise his kid alone and then have an exceptionally hot son who spreads the parents' genes wildly in the next generation. (With a daughter the impact would be less marked).

Anyway, for men this is bad and we should insist that women should have exclusive partners. Otherwise even average men could struggle finding an adequate partner.

[Unit1]

These are the guys we call the "top 20%" of guys, that "80%" of women want. The actual numbers may vary a lot but still we wouldn't talk about it if it does not happen so much.

I don't know why women don't see it. But they are involving themselves with the top 20% of men, that many/most women are after. Why should one of the top 20% of men commit to one girl? He has a swarm of them.

I don't blame them. Most men, who want girls are often on the perpetual journey to discover what these top 20% of men did or have to be one of the top 20%.

[Darkrainbow]

What are the characteristics of top 20% men?

[Unit1]

@Darkrainbow

If I knew, I wouldn't be single today.
It encompasses something more than just looks and confidence and charisma. I'm not gonna mention money.
And this mysterious something I believe I am missing. Something pretty obvious but I am oblivious to it.

I need to speak to women and collect a list of their crushes. Then I could see a common denominator. If most of them don't go after someone like Brad Pitt, Christian Grey or Jeremy Meeks, then I am pretty sure it's me and I can change this mysterious something standing in my way of dating.

[Darkrainbow]

The issue is that men are often raised with a sense of entitlement, believing they deserve many things. You don't need to be with the top 20% of men - charismatic, wealthy, or good-looking - to be cheated on. Many average men easily cheat on their wives with prostitutes. It's hard to believe why men think only 20% of men are liars, cheaters, etc. I've seen interviews with drug addicts, and many of them sell their bodies for drug money. Interestingly, a lot of them mention that married men are the ones who mostly pay them for sex 🤔

[Darkrainbow]

Where I live, literally 90% of men cheat on their wives with sex workers, paying as little as $15 per hour.

[Unit1]

@Darkrainbow There can be many reasons why they cheat on their wives. But I digress. You're saying most men cheat on their wives. That's easy for them to do because these men are paying the prostitutes. Anyone with money can do that too. Even a bald, fat and pimpled guy with money and social awkwardness can do that too. There is no skill involved. Only money.
I can not comment on that. I do not have a swarm of girls wanting to take my arm. Paying prostitutes is the top easiest way.

[Darkrainbow]

Yes but when a woman complain about cheating, everyone tells them it's because she is with top man and it's somehow her fault. But they even don't know what type of person she is
in relationship.

[Unit1]

@Darkrainbow I see what you mean now.
Doesn't sound all that thorough thought about. So we can cut this down to "top 20% guy or prostitute client type guy". Anything else?

[Anonymous]

Narcissistic, you don’t have to be faithful if he’s not faithful. You’re restricting your vagina from other 🍆’s and better 🍌’s.

Just because the guy looks like Brad Pitt. Makes no sense. Makes you look like the one on the loosing end. Makes you look like the FOOL 🤡. You’re allowing yourself to get stepped on. Same applies for women who marry Chads when the Chad is in his 30’s after he explored all his options. Thinking that he’ll be faithful to you. 🤡 Again, you're THE BIGGEST FOOL. 🤡

You’re free to date Cheating men. Brads & Chads. You’re free to date all the hotties. Just don’t expect fidelity, monogamy. You’re free to cheat and explore your options too if he’s doing it. Otherwise you’re just gonna look stupid and you’re gonna get stepped on like some door mat.

[Opinion Owner]

I agree with @MrOracle

[Berethor]

A man is like a key, a woman is like a lock, man who do it is alpha, woman who it is a ho.

https://www.idiva.com/relationships-love/relationships/this-couple-is-a-lesson-in-successful-polyamory-relationship/18004892

[Asker]

You say the same thing to every question.

[Berethor]

When why are you asking the same questions? men and women are different.

[Asker]

I don't you keep saying the same thing over and over again no matter what the question is as long as it is related to men and women you repeat yourself like a broken record.

[Darkrainbow]

Because he is a hypocrite 🤭

[Berethor]

Men and women are different, I am just pointing out the truth, hos are bad. :)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oDaaAI6keSw

[Darkrainbow]

Then dont be a man ho :d

[Berethor]

Only woman can be a ho, but if you want to date a virgin man it's okay. :)

[Asker]

@Darkrainbow he is an idiot.

[Darkrainbow]

No because i don't have such silly generalisations about people. And a man also can be a hoe.

[Alli39]

Toxic double standards for 200, please.

Aka, these people are unhealthy, lack empathy, generally disrespectful etc. If you want to date around, your partner (s) get to as well should they so choose. Jealousy is usually a sign of insecurity anyway.

[crmoore]

Why, though? And this is coming from a fairly strictly monogamous man.

Like, if a woman is okay with him seeing other women, and he isn't okay with her seeing other men, and she makes the decision that her interest in him is greater than her dislike (if any) in not being able to see other guys, then what is the problem?

And why is it that relationships need to be symmetrical? If my wife likes it when I give her piggy back rides up the stairs to our room, should I expect that she, too, carry me on her back up the stairs?

[inhua]

it's not a double standard if she allows it

[Alli39]

@crmoore Excluding polyamory, which is a whole other situation, there are a lot of guys out there that celebrate the ability to get multiple partners, but shame women for the same behavior because they think their gender difference justifies it. It's just straight up sexist. If it's morally ok for a man to have multiple partners then it's morally ok for a woman to do the same (or neither is appropriate), you don't get both. Of course, if both people think having multiple partners is acceptable, but only one person has an inclination to pursue that, then frankly that's fine as long as it's ok with the partner.

[crmoore]

I agree that a man shaming (different from "disliking") a woman for doing the things that he does is condemnable. But the post doesn't mention the guy shaming women for the same behavior he's partaking in. So you're either assuming, generalizing, or attributing qualities that are not present in the hypothetical situation. Why?

Also, the post says "guys who date multiple women" not "guys who cheat." So the default assumption here should be polyamory, rather than the exception.

So "it's morally okay for a woman to do the same" could be interpreted in multiple ways. The more straightforward interpretation is that, yes, if a man thinks it's morally sound to date multiple women, then he should think it's morally sound for women to do the same, of which disliking such an act doesn't conflict with. (Meaning, he can agree it's morally sound, but still find it unattractive)

The second interpretation is "if he does it then it's immoral for him to dislike it if his partner does it" which is what I'm inclined to believe you meant. And if that's the case, can you please refute my earlier mention of the scenario where I give my wife piggy back rides, and she does not return the favor?

[Alli39]

@crmoore I mean it's the specific situation of a guy wanting to date around but not wanting a woman to do the same, which suggests he is shaming/be generally negative about the idea.
And personally I don't think that differences in physical ability and general preference relate to this, so I'm ignoring you "piggy back" scenario.

But regardless, my point is that this is a double standard of expectation that gives one person the freedom to make choices attempting to limit the other person's choices. Like I said, in the case of polyamory, where there's no shaming and both people are engaging in complete freedom of choice, then I have no issue. But that's not what I was referring to and I clearly stated that.

[crmoore]

You say it suggests he is shaming/being negative about the idea, but why?

Like, if I workout to develop a musuclsr physique, but don't want a girlfriend who is doing the same, am I shaming women who workout for muscular physiques? Am I being negative about women who do so? Do I look down upon women who do so? Or is it as simple as I support people's freedom but it doesn't happen to be something that I find attractive?

And the piggy back scenario was conceptual, the fine details could be substituted for other things.

For example, if I give my girl oil massages, but she doesn't give me oil massages, and I don't mind, should she still be expected to give me oil massages? Is she a bad person of she doesn't? Or is it okay that she gets to enjoy something that I don't get to enjoy (or care to)?

And even if I did want to receive oil massages from her but she said she's simply not interested in it, should she be socially forced to? Or would you suggest that we break up over this travesty? What if I'd rather be with her and not receive oil massages than to not have her OR the oil massages?

With all due respect, your stance is flawed from a variety of angles.

[Alli39]

@crmoore With all due respect, I'm really not interested in trying to explain to you why a double standard of behavior in terms of sexual/romantic relationships is different from making personal choices to do things for yourself/others that don't limit the autonomy of the other person. Have a great day 👋

[crmoore]

So be it. If you change your mind, I'll be here.

[Rei13]

I know a girl who dates two men that is still going strong and a few men who dated multiple women that didn’t work out. I honestly don’t care what other people do so long as it isn’t harmful or affecting me. I personally wouldn’t want to be in a relationship with a man that had multiple girlfriends, I don’t like to share.

[hismave]

That's freaking selfish and controlling. Men say when women cheat emotions are involve but when they do it differs. That complete rubbish. You can't say u didn't feel shit when u were with other women... there's definitely a feeling that comes with it.
In the first place why are u even dating multiple women and then women can't do it too. Mtchwww

[inhua]

it does differ and for biological reasons. in nature, sex is instinctively used for reproduction and the creation of a potential offspring is what bonds a man and a woman together. maternity is ensured and the mother of the offspring is guaranteed but paternity isn't and the father is largely unknown. which is why a man has to have sex with the same woman multiple times to gain an attachment towards her.

having sex once with a woman means nothing if he isn't sure she doesn't sleep around with other men. no man instinctively wants to raise another man's offspring even if no offspring are going to be produced

[Vegasrunner]

@hismave Yes the feeling is called accomplishments. That's literally why we keep count. It's difficult for women to let someone inside w/ out feeling something but I can bang a random and still come back tp my main chick and feel nothing. It's just one of the differences between men and women.

[hismave]

Vegasrunner well that's in no way fair to women. I know for that of a man truly loves a woman he'd stick to her. Its very much possible

[hismave]

Inhua so constant sex with a man is a way to keep him? cause what if i don't want sex till marriage...

[Darkrainbow]

@Vegasrunner meanwhile pornstars: 🤔🤔

[Darkrainbow]

@Vegasrunner meanwhile golddiggers: 🤡🤭🤔

[Vegasrunner]

@hismave As you mature you'll understand that life isn't fair. It isn't "fair" that nightclubs let women in for free and make men pay, but that's the world we live in you just have to remember to take advantage of the advantages you have. Most men stick w/ one woman because they don't have better options.

[Vegasrunner]

@Darkrainbow correct monetizing their bodies is another advantage women have that's not fair.

[Vegasrunner]

@Darkrainbow @darkrainbow I'm not sure if Goldiggetsrs fall into an advantage a woman can only be a Gold Digger if a man is willing to let her.

[Darkrainbow]

@Vegasrunner and i assure u that most women stick w/ one man because they don't have better options.

[Darkrainbow]

@Vegasrunner By mentioning prostitutes and gold diggers, I wanted to emphasize that claiming it's absurd for women to be with a man they feel something for is also nonsensical. Just like men, women can also approach men to use them and not necessarily have genuine feelings.
And a women can cheat on her partner just to get sexual pleasure. 🤷

[hismave]

@darkrainbow that point is so valid. Women can also be with men without even loving them but for some crazy motive. When women do that they are called names... even we women would stand against such but in the case of a man who cheats you people say... "it's in a man's nature" ill never buy that. The same way a man can cheat so can a woman so why is there some absurd excuse for men. I hate the idea so much cause it'd make the up coming generation feel like there's a valid reason to carrying women. For heaven's sake we're higher animals with intellectual skill.
Another thing is the matter of sex... yeah I get life ain't fair @Vegasrunner but doesn't mean humans should purposely make it unfair. Personally when a guy comes up with idea of being sexually intimate with me I get really scared... To me at that moment it's a signal that this guy wants me for my body and not for who i am.. I may be wrong to feel that way but I can't help it. Men sexualize everything so how would u even tell if he's asking out of love and not from the need of satisfaction. Gradually I'm learning that "to guys sex, respect, peace and security is love and to a ladies attention, loyalty, commitment, vulnerability and availability is love.

[Vegasrunner]

@Darkrainbow I doubt it. Even an ugly woman has more options than an attractive man. I do agree that they stick w/ them because they can't retain a better man though.

[Vegasrunner]

@Darkrainbow Gotcha, those would be bad examples. The lifespan of prostitutes is extremely short w/ a high turnover rate. If you go on the Vegas strip theirs a new set of prostitutes walking every month, partly because its difficult for women to have emotionless sex.
A golddigger is a woman that uses a man solely for money and a lot of time isn't even having sex w/ the men she's exploiting. The type of man that would give into an actual Golddigger is usually does that because that's all he can get so that wouldn't be applicable.

[Darkrainbow]

@Vegasrunner bro most men are just controversial as always. When men don't find it convenient, they accuse women of immorality for engaging in sexual activities in their youth and blame them for expecting marriage as they get older. Yet, when it suits them, they claim that women don't engage in sex without love. If that's the case, then why do you label women who have had more sexual experiences in their youth as immoral, accusing them of not valuing sex, love, and lacking the feeling of affection? :d

[Vegasrunner]

@Darkrainbow TY for sharing that however I'm not quite sure what men you're speaking about. I also don't understand your point, as accusing woman of immorality and claiming women can't have sex w/out love is pretty congruent. If you're speaking of me specifically I haven't labeled anyone anything. Are you sure you tagged the correct person?

[Darkrainbow]

@Vegasrunner What I'm trying to say is that many men often claim that when it comes to marriage, young women are only after sexual pleasure. They argue that these women are focused on increasing their "body count" when they're young, and then want to get married when their allure fades with age. However, when it comes to infidelity, they quickly assert that women don't engage with people they don't have emotional feelings for or aren't in love with, implying that female infidelity is worse. Can't you understand the contradiction here?

[Darkrainbow]

@Vegasrunner I mean, if women don't engage in sexual relationships without strong feelings, then why are women with a high "body count" labeled as immoral or sluts? The fact is that many men think these women are incapable of loving a man and are only seeking sexual pleasure. If a woman with a high body count states that she loves her partners and the relationship just didn't work out for whatever reason, literally no man thinks she is telling the truth. 😂

[Vegasrunner]

@Darkrainbow Kind of, the 1st part is still a bit confusing. What I think you're saying is that young women chase sex when they're young but then look for marriage after they've increased their body count and have aged past their prime? However I don't see the connection you're trying to make between that an infidelity. Married woman don't tend to cheat unless they have an emotional connection w/ someone else while men can have sex w/ a bunch of women and not feel anything. Less likely for woman.

[Darkrainbow]

@Vegasrunner What I'm saying is that if women value emotional attachment this much, then they shouldn't be judged because of their past. But no, it's not like that. If a woman has had many men in her past, men automatically think that she lacks the ability to love.
And they say such women just chasing sex and increase bodycount without genuine and deep feelings like love.

[Vegasrunner]

@Darkrainbow You're examples do more to validate my point than yours. Women w/ high body counts are labeled sluts by other women because women understand how rare it is for a woman to have unemotional sex. How many men have you had sex with?

[Vegasrunner]

@Darkrainbow In the real world everyone gets judged, there is literally a profession named after that. I've never said anything about women lacking the ability to love so I wouldn't be the best person to speak to that. As a man that has been w/ hundreds of women all over the world I would have to say I've never encountered a woman who just chased sex. If that were true you wouldn't have prostitution, pornography, dating apps etc. I hope this answers your question.

[Darkrainbow]

@Vegasrunner My count is three if foreplay counts in the body count. If not, then it's 0.
I also know women who label other women as sluts; it's especially prevalent in traditional countries. I think it's due to different factors. I know women who call another woman a slut just because she got in her boyfriend's car, even when no sex is involved. 🤷

[Darkrainbow]

@Vegasrunner I know women who label another woman a slut just because she wore makeup or even normal shorts. Therefore, relying on women's judgments of each other isn't always accurate.

[Vegasrunner]

@Darkrainbow Lol, I don't think foreplay counts. Your own life exprience proves my point, you yourself recognize how valuable a woman's purity is so not sure why you believe woman have unemotional sex. If that is true then how could you be a 28 yro virgin?

[Vegasrunner]

@Darkrainbow I can't tell if you're just trying to make my point for me or not. Exactly! You can't rely on women's judgments because women act off emotion. That is the same emotion that make them less likely to have sex w/ someone that don't have an emotional tie to. Congratulations, you solved your own question.

[inhua]

it certainly is, provided that he is only man she has ever had sex with

if you don't want sex until marriage, that rule better apply to every single guy out there, not just let the hot guys have their fun for free while the future husband has to pay for dates, pay for vacations, pay the bills, pay for the wedding, commit his time, energy, resources to you

[hismave]

Hmmm well I guess you're right. The whole men and women abilities topic is just so mych. The world Is really a crazy place... but guys should really calm down with the cheating cause really who cheats and still claim to love his woman. Cause really if u men were in our shoes you guys will walk out of the relationship at the first mistake. The funny thing is when u give a second chance and they do it again... purposely😂

[Vegasrunner]

@hismave in my opinion it's difficult for most women to see past themselves which is why this concept is so difficult to understand. Since they are on the receiving end of attention they look at sexual opportunities as something easy and organic. Since men pursue sexual opportunities they look at it as an investment into an achievement. If I could just exsist and have sexual opportunities thrown at me, I may look at it like women do however since I realize I have to take a risk in order to get the same opportunity I'm definitely going to take advantage when I get one. To my point it's so difficult for women to understand because they get emotionally attached to the men that bang them.

[hismave]

Really that's not called for... women do see past themselves... don't say what you don't know, assumptions are bad. Plus I'm speaking from experience

[hismave]

Take advantage😂😂😂... Ñoooo this is really bad. I pray the upcoming generation don't think this way. "So because I worked for a job... My supervisor shouldn't correct me when I'm wrong or I should take the job for granted". For the fact that u guys are the ones that approach and it ain't so easy why don't you stick to the girl u eventually get and love her tenderly. The fact that ur speaking like this tells me you've done this kinda thing which is really sad for real. The fact that u even term women as Achievement though. So guys wake and begin their day with I'm gonna cheat on my girl with 4 others girls.. that's my new Achievement. If I were a guy frankly speaking I'd be so damn happy because I get to choose the girl I want. Women don't really have that though we do in term of saying no and yes but in term of going out there and seeking out who we won't, it's quiet a different story, but u men have that... you get to choose, you get to select yet nooooo its not enough you want all. Anything in skirt literally.

[Vegasrunner]

@hismave Correction you are speaking from your individual experience. I'm as speaking from the experience of tens of thousands of women.

[hismave]

Now I'm more confused but it's fine I get ur point. Hopefully the world becomes a better place

[Vegasrunner]

@hismave Lol, all the prayers in the world won't change a man's natural instinct. In your apology the man would be the supervisor because he is the one bringing resources, finances and assets. The logic of sticking w/ only 1 girl only benifits that one girl. If I approach a woman bag her and then find out later that she's annoying, and useless then obviously I'm going to reserve the right to drop her. It's an obvious choice that a man has, women just struggle when men have options. Your wake up apology validates my point. MEN can't WAKE UP AND JUST SAY IM GOING TO CHEAT because the guy would still have to find the girl approach bag etc, women can do that which is why women who cheat aren't respected. Very few guys can choose the girl they want if they could there would only be a small percent of marriages. Most guys are stuck w/ the girl they can get.

[Vegasrunner]

@hismave It's ok. At your age most women are confused. You won't really understand it until you get into your early 30's late 40's and you're receiving less attention from men. Why do you think that relationship podcast typically feature girls in their teens and early 20's and men in their 30's?

[hismave]

Ohhh ok. Well can't drag this no more. I'm tired. Thanks for this little banter though. It was fun

[hismave]

Ohhh you're way older than I am. My apologies if I was rude in anyway. You spoke like this generation men that's why I replied to you that way. I wish men respected women like before. Now cheating, funication and adultery is at high rates. I can't even with this world anymore. Can't wait for God to give me the right person that supports my ideologies though... I'll respect his too

[Vegasrunner]

@hismave It's fine w/ me. This is a topic I have great experience and knowledge on so hearing other perspectives is am educational benifit to me.

[Vegasrunner]

@hismave Lol, yes I'm aware, however my comment wasn't meant as an insult rather a statement of fact. At your age you haven't experienced a lot of relationship truths yet, giving you the benifit of being naive. If you're lucky, you'll live as long as I have and will start to understand these dynamics better. A perfect example is your "men respected women like b4" comment. While this may come as a surprise to you but women were saying that 20 years ago and will be saying that 20 years from now. Humans rarely deviate from their primal nature. Men have always wanted multiple women and women have always wanted the best man they can get. The only thing different today is that instinct has been exponentially put on display w/ Social Media, online dating, etc. 20 years from now some other technology will allow for both genders to satisfy those needs and women will still be complaining. If u want the "right person" you will have the same two options all women have.
A. Find a faithful LV man
B. Find a HV man that you are willing to accept infidelity from.
GL

[hismave]

Hmmmm. Thanks. So in other words there's no perfect man just gotta choose the one we can cope with

[Vegasrunner]

@hismave Lol, there's no perfect people period. The good news is you don't need to have a man, you could choose to be on your own, however the belief that a man gets up everyday, takes on the world, bust his ass to make a name for himself and the reward is he gets stuck w/ one woman for the rest of his life is a bit naive. in my opinion.

[Anonymous]

No different than women who like it when their man gives them piggy back rides but don't give their man piggy back rides.

Look, I get it. It's kinda off putting in some ways. But relationships don't have to be symmetrical. Someone's response to something like this shouldn't be "you're a horrible person" it should be "I don't share that preference but you like what you like and that's okay."

Only under the circumstance that he is imposing his preferences on unwilling people should anyone take issue with this.

[Kaamraj]

If a man is able to pull that off then without a doubt he's an alpha (top 1 %). What he is wanting and exercising is normal natural behavior of dominance and sexual exclusivity. This is no different than how our closest ancestors the chimpanzees work, one alpha mates with all the other females until another one from outside challenges and displaces him and until fairly recently, perhaps 12,000 years ago, this is how humans used to work also. Monogamy (marriage) is a recent concept.

[Darkrainbow]

Let's not only focus on men's instincts. When it comes to women, waiting for marriage also isn't women's nature, but look at how society denigrates non-virgin women. Additionally, in nature, females do not care for their ill mates. However, in society, observe what people say when a woman divorces her ill husband and finds a new one. Society is not solely revolving around instincts.

[AndLikeThatHesGone]

It's definitely hypocritical, but if the guy is up front about it with the girl (s) he's dating, then it's the girl's decision to go along with it or not.

Anyone can ask for anything, but I don't know why a girl would agree to that.

If he's not up front about it, then he's just plain cheating, and that's wrong.

[FinalFantasyBro]

I honestly don't agree on the sentiment and believe both genders shouldn't think about cheating like at all. Now if it like one of those open relationships where both parties in the couple can each date multiple people than obviously that is different because both the guy and girl agree to allow the other date multiple people but this sounds like a double standard if only one person can date multiple people but he or she forbid their partner to obviously do the same.

[Anonymous]

Not my business. If they’re all fine w that kind of arrangement that’s on them. If she doesn’t like the situation she’s free to leave. in my opinion women tend to enable this by letting him do that. It’s like when women say men need to stop treating women like sex objects, objectifying women at strip clubs or hooters or any other number of establishments where women dress provocatively. But guess who’s providing that entertainment willingly? Women.

[Anonymous]

Well if you maybe it’s the woman’s fault for:

1. Spreading it for guys like that (no you won’t be his “special” one)

2. Cowering and caving into his unfair bullshit demands. Why are you so “powerless” just to say no and walk away?

3. Engaging in hypergamy to begin with. It directly contradicts feminism and upholds “patriarchy”.

You deserve your equivalent. Not less but your definitely NOT entitled to more just because you have a vagina.

[atiquahbby]

Well, goes both ways. Both are equals, neither is superior

[Opinion Owner]

@atiquahbby not true at all when it comes to dating. No. Women got to STOP conveniently claiming that dating is the same for guys as it is for them. Far from it.

Yes women have their own unique challenges when it comes to their biology and interactions with men (risk of being physically/sexually assaulted, risk of getting pregnant). But as for social differences if you take semi attractive guy vs a semi attractive woman (and every thing is else equal when it comes intelligence, socioeconomic background, personality) the woman will hands down have huge advantage over the guy when it comes to dating.

She will have more options, she will have to take fewer risks, she can be more picky, etc. Being single or not is a voluntary CHOICE for her. The guy however is required to stick his neck out and constantly face rejection or he always remain single.

It’s an advantage that feminists always conveniently play dumb to and ignore. I don’t believe things will ever change but I wish women would own up to this privilege.

[atiquahbby]

After all, all gender norms are merely built socially. Women do face challenges, and in terms of dating there are challenges in finding a good-looking guy, decent, saves himself for marriage and takes care of his wife just like I am all these for my husband.

[Opinion Owner]

@atiquahbby they are not just “socially built”. There are thousands of years of evolution that impact how men and women think differently. Our bodies are different. Our brains and hormones are different. There are differences that are predetermined at a DNA level.

Anyway I’m glad you are in a happy marriage. I’m not always pessimistic. Never been married but I have been in a few long term relationships. Things worked great until they didn’t.

[DextroShade]

Men and women aren't the same so it's far worse when a woman cheats than when a man does. A man's biological instinct to ensure paternity is why he won't tolerate promiscuity from a woman he takes seriously. He can get away with sleeping around more because he can't trick his wife into raising another woman's child unlike what she could do to him.

[Spongebobssocks]

I dont know why some people in the comments call this cheating because its not cheating at all.. hense she agrees to it.

However I think people can do whatever they want. It's personally not for me but I won't judge someone for it:)

[Kelly6]

totally agree Spongebob
maybe i should be called patrick lol

[Spongebobssocks]

@Kelly6 lol👍🏻

[nastyb]

this was actually what men were like in the 1980s and prior. Most men were cheaters and their wives dealt with it.

[Asker]

Should they still deal with it?

[nastyb]

@Asker

truth is... some women have no choice but to deal with it. a lot of them can't survive or pay bills without their husbands pay checks

[Asker]

I'm talking about today they don't really have an excuse now.

[nastyb]

@Asker

there are a lot of women that are educated, have their own careers can pay their own bills today but don't forget that there are a lot of women who also don't have an education or career.

[Asker]

Well they better try to get a divorce and taking his money.

[nastyb]

a lotta these guys don't have a lot of assets or money. they just hold jobs.

[nastyb]

poor men tend to marry poor women. most of the time.

[Asker]

Well move in with a family member or something don't be allowing someone to make a fool out of you for years on.

[nastyb]

what makes you think a family member will just take you in and pay for your everything? there's nobody that would do that. especially if you have children. things can get very expensive.

[Asker]

I never said that you can get a job not like it is hard to get a job so you can get on your feet eventually.

[nastyb]

you can barely feed yourself on a minimum wage job. how are you gonna pay rent and feed kids?

[nastyb]

a job is a job. but not every job is enough to pay for everything.

[Asker]

Yeah I don't care I'm not going to make excuses to be with a sorry low down and dirty man. People talk about you behind your back when you allow a man to use you.

[nastyb]

@Asker

life may be easier tolerating BS than being without the means to survive.

unless you're in an abusive or life threatening situation, many women chose to tolerate bs instead

[nastyb]

this is why women need to focus on education, making money, going for a good career so she can survive well without a husband

[Asker]

Exactly

[Vegasrunner]

@nastyb Aoy more difficult back then than it is now. 20+ years ago you had to put in so much work to find a girl now you can literally put a profile online and have a chick at your house in an hour.

[nastyb]

@Vegasrunner

women have higher standards today than ever before throughout history. back then any dumb asshole with a decent job can find a wife. Nowadays, women are looking for more than just a man with a wallet but a QUALITY man.

[Miristheiss]

So they want the woman to be committed and exclusive to them but they are free to still get with other girls?

I don't think much of it, I would expect most women would just reject that and move on to another guy.

[Billlewis]

I think they're being totally unrealistic. The woman should have the freedom to date other guys whenever she wants, and the guy should always be exclusive to her.

[Dserfs]

There’s nothing more disgusting than a promiscuous woman. Men are praised for having multiple women because it is very difficult to pull off and it implies that man has to be attractive to women. Women on the other hand have to do nothing to sleep around

[Darkrainbow]

🤡🤡

[msmissydc]

Hypocrites, and most of the time just they dont know what they are talking about and just spread lies. Some even believe their own lies, which doesn't make them true though.

[inhua]

perfectly fine

if she don't like it, she can go find someone else

it's like saying if a man's wife wears a dress, he should wear a dress too

[lilBigPotato]

Hypocritical. But if I know that he's still dating other girls few weeks in then I'd move on what. At that stage people should have made up their mind.

[Anonymous]

i think of them as lowly as i think of guys who sleep with multiple women but expect the woman he is going to marry or date to be a virgin XD

[sheenagwapa]

not plastic... some men want to date their romantic prospect to other men because they are too confident the girl would still choose them in the end 😂😂😂 dude you don't have to tell me or command me

[gallie]

As long as the girl is ok with it. Leave if she doesn't feel right.
Personally I cannot do this knowing the guy is dating multiple women.

[Juxtapose]

You women literally enable it. You go after the guys who have all the options + don't give a fuck about other people and then you act surprised when he's not won over by your pussy or slightly above average looks.

[Darkrainbow]

Bro literary a lot of men praise cheating yikessss

[hismave]

Likeeee. Its so damn annoying and it's the freaking stupid excuse they give "men can cheat without emotions but women can't"... like I don't buy this. You don't want a woman that's dating different men but you want her to want you... you that is dating different women... how does that even sound right.

[thatshydork]

I think that they’re very insecure and I feel sad for them

[chevy1]

well iam not intrested in having children and i do have birth control the coil

[midnightmoon05]

I don’t date that kind so I don’t know. Or do I care.
do you date them?

[LaFemmeFatale_1]

I don’t think about such guys at all. I’d rather spend my time thinking about mosquitoes.

[FunkyMonkee]

As long as neither is attached, both sides can play the field! If he doesn't like it, tough shit!!

[Lliam]

I think they are egotistical douche bags and women who put up with their shit are desperate.

[boobliker]

as long as there open about it it's ok I once took three girl-friends to dinner in the hope that 2 of them would come home to my new flat, they all did but not at the same tin=me shame

[jshm2]

That's called "being possessive" and is a red flag.

[elizamichale1]

They r just hypocrites n a typical reflection of our society

[shades777]

I mean a man with resources definitely can date more than one woman, its just that men aren't really interested in women players like women are into men players

[Kabluie]

They can do who they want, and they do since we're poly.

[Fireguy17]

possessive, idiots, too full of themselves, narrow minded...

[jestergent]

It sounds like you have your eyes on the 1%.

[Vegasrunner]

That's a rule that I have. The woman can definitely date other dudes she just can't see me and date other dudes.

[Lakeshore]

If a guy dates multiple women, then the woman should be able to date others.

[Chthou95]

Women allow it. Look up the 80/20 rule. Women will share a man who's in the top 20% rather than settling for an average man

[Asker]

Girls don't be ok with it guys just don't give a fuck.

[Chthou95]

If you dont give a fuck, you're okay with it

[Asker]

The guys don't care how the women feel about it.

[Chthou95]

But you end putting up with it because youd rather share the high value man than settle for s loyal average man

[Asker]

Yeah whatever

[Chthou95]

True hurts babe 😋

[Asker]

I don't agree with you because the logic sounds dumb that's the truth some misogynistic men want to believe.

[Chthou95]

You're aware in 2023 that 63% of men are single while only 34% of women are single right?

[Asker]

Keep believing that bad behavior keeps the opposite sex interested you are actually shooting yourself in the food because you both lose when you play games.

[Asker]

Foot*

[Chthou95]

Where did i mention bad behavior and that you have to be like that to attract women?

[Asker]

When you say women allow men to basically cheat that's pretty saying that women accept bad behavior.

[Chthou95]

Yeah because they do. There's a lot of women who accept the behaviour of men who aren't good for them long term

[Asker]

It doesn't last anyway so that makes no sense to be toxic just have to be yourself.

[Chthou95]

It doesn't last but the men women are chasing dont play by the rules and go at their own pace. And women are okay with that

[Asker]

Yeah people can keep doing that and see what kind of results they end up with.

[Chthou95]

If it keeps on working a certain way for them, they're never going to stop

[Asker]

Yeah they are stupid asses to both genders are.

[Chthou95]

That's how it is. That's how things work. Welcome to modern dating

[Asker]

Welcome to modern jackassville.

[Chthou95]

Lmao

[RingOfFire]

I think they are acting the way nature designed them.

[Anonymous]

I don't think anything. Because it has nothing to do with me. And if a woman chooses a guy who has this standard why would she care what I think?😆😆😆 She chose him.

[SolitarySolace]

Just as bad as women dating multiple men but won't let those men date other women.

[cloud9vortex1234]

I say he's probably a Big Catch. Women will tolerate that from a guy who has a lot going for him.

[marish01]

A man who doesn't want his woman to date or have sex with other men is not a doormat.

[HeartFullOfGlue]

They are whore-ish, hypocritical men who lack self control

[Pohjolan]

I think that they are fuckboys and that gals who put up with that can only blame themselves.

[Luopio27]

Reminds me of muslims. They can have 4 wives but women can only have 1 husband.

[Brady]

If the women they're dating think it's OK then it's OK. The women can decide this 4 themselves.

[pethouse]

I think anyone that dates multiple people at once is kinda scummy

[Manuel2]

He is a bully and control freak
Or a Mormon
Or Muslim
Or A Donald Trump supporter

[Anonymous]

It's called a virgin whore complex, the man dates a lot of women but only sees them as sexual, not marriage material.

[Asker]

Why do they waste your time if they don't want anything serious with you when they know that you want a serious relationship?

[atiquahbby]

Any guy who sleeps around isn't marriage material

[justabuddy]

Not much, but to be fair. I also don't think much of girls who agree to this type of relationship either.

[TheMiraclee]

I would definitely get nervous and not think well about it

[Simslover92]

Hypocrite to the max!