We meet up and buy some sandwiches and snacks, maybe some wine or beers and we have a picnic in a sunny park with lots of dogs. I bust out connect four and absolutely decimate your entire connect four career before it even starts. We leave the park and pass by a sex shop, you keep trying to convince me to buy you the largest strap on you could find but I deflect with questions about your rising moon and Jonah Hill. After the shop we rent bikes and race to Van Lewens ice cream. I end up winning cause I’ve watched premium rush a couple days before so I’m feeling agile. Over ice cream we talk about things we loved as kids, we both mention Seinfeld and begin to feel a connection. After ice cream we walk to the water views but we’re both beat so we call it day. We make up a pretty dank hand shake and then I try to kiss you but miss your lips. My mouth is on your chin, you say let’s try again but now my mouth is on your nose. You figure my depth perception is off and hold my head straight, we nail the kiss on the third try and we hi five congratulating ourselves. We both go home and never hear from each other again.
Ladies, how does this first date idea sound?
