Is it bad I still don’t feel the same way he does for me yet?

[lamuñekita]

i’m going out with a guy, we’ve known eachother for about 4-5 days.

we hungout the 3rd day and i came home and he told me really likes me and only has eyes for me.

i think he’s really sweet but i did tell him look i don’t know if i feel the same yet, since he’s starting to hint at a relationship and i e never even had one before (he knows this) so i don’t want to tell him i like him just for me to leave later.

am i leading him on? i did tell him look in kind free right now, meaning im just talking to whoever, no strings attached and he said he completely understands and he really hopes i chose him and he’s going to try his best.

i do feel a bit rushed since we have only seen eachother in person once and i don’t start liking guys after a bout a few weeks, im someone who falls for the person while getting to know them better, not the first day.

what do i do?

Updates

+1 y

i feel really bad because he’s starting to act really attached to me and he’s love bombing me a lot. i feel a bit overwhelmed and i don’t want to screw anything up. also i’ve never dated or been in a relationship tbh.

[RedInnocent68]

It’s okay to still be making up your mind, and I don’t think 4-5 days is necessarily leading him on. But it is probably good to be introspective, self-aware, and asking the question.

[lamuñekita]

i don’t want to hurt anyone

[RedInnocent68]

Agreed. Take it slow, if that’s what you need to make up your mind, and don’t over commit. Although, it sounds like you’re landing on, ‘no’.

[lamuñekita]

no no i genuinely am interested in him but he is already wanting to commit

[bowenw]

Take it at your own pace and be honest with him. If he cares for you the way he says he does he will be okay to wait. It's a red flag if he starts pressuring you.

[lamuñekita]

he isn’t really pressuring me but he keeps bringing up the fact that he treats me well and that i should kind of fixate more on him (basically he’s just trying to win me over) he does seem a bit desperate to get a girlfriend which isn’t a good sign, i don’t want to be someone’s void filler, i want someone to genuinely want me for me

[bowenw]

I think he is seriously jumping the gun and needs to let you take things at your own pace. He may just be coming on strong to try to get you into bed.

[lamuñekita]

oh god i hope not. he seems genuinely infatuated on the phone but in person he’s quite inattentive to me

[bowenw]

I'm just guessing.
That's weird that he is inattentive in person. Is he shy?

[lamuñekita]

the complete opposite. he’s packed with friends. a complete extrovert, when we are out he says hi to so many people. very intense guy as well, some times i feel a bit left out but he has me on his arm on holds my waist. i don’t know how to feel yet about him. he’s playful with me too sometimes but a little touchy and pushy

[bowenw]

Thank you for the MHO. 😊

I hope he learns to respects your boundaries.

[katiesmuff]

4 - 5 days is a very short time to seriously get very serious feelings about someone. Feelings that quickly is more like infatuated with.

[ProbablyClueless]

Y'all have only been dating for 5 days... The fact you're still making up your mind is healthy.

[lamuñekita]

well “dating” is a string word in this case. the first three days i told him i still see his as friends since we literally met through friends and i thought he was super funny and nice. we hangout with eachother and he’s extremely determined to win me over and i feel quite pressured. i just wanna take this slow

[BLP11520]

Explain how fast it is to you, you are not leading him on

[lamuñekita]

i love talking to him i’m starting to feel a bit more everyday but it takes time for me. i try to tell him this and he says he don’t mind and is still going to do whatever it takes to have me

[BLP11520]

He is determined then

[Wise4myage]

Of course not, you barely know the guy.