Hey! So me and this guy matched on a dating site, we texted a little and decided to arrange a date, met up and it was incredible energy. We spoke about what we wanted in the future and our values aligned, we confessed we thought we were each others ideal match. However he’s going away for a while in a few months , and also has a lot of stress in his life regarding starting a career (he currently lives with his parents, not an issue for me). We arranged a second date, but he messaged me saying he was so shocked we got on so well, he wasn’t expecting it, and that I’d make a great partner but he’s got to focus on somethings right now and that he’s sad from having to let a previous relationship go and tired from falling in love etc. He said he wasn’t sure he even wanted to meet up at first but was glad we did and that he thinks I’m lovely etc. I have a feeling he originally just wanted something physical but was surprised. He’s the loveliest guy ever and I just want him to be happy, but I’d love to be with him.. will he come back around when he’s ready?
Met the guy of my dreams but it’s not the right time for him?
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Aw man, that really sucks. It definitely sounds like you guys connected on another level. But I get why the timing isn't right for him too. Moving away and career stuff is super stressful.
A few thoughts:
- Give him space for now. As much as you like him, he needs to deal with his own stuff without pressure.
- Don't wait around either. Live your life and if it's meant to be, maybe he'll come back around down the line. But protect your heart too.
- You could check in casually every now and then. Like a quick text in a few months to see how he's doing. But don't be too available either.
- Who knows, maybe staying as friends could turn into more later on when the pressures are off. But don't hold your breath.
At the end of the day, you want someone who's excited to be with YOU and not stressed about other stuff. This dude clearly sees your potential, so that's dope. But keep putting yourself out there just in case. Trust that if it's right, it'll work out - in its own time.
Don't lose hope! He may circle back or you could meet an even better match. Just focus on you for now.
that's not a dream