Hey there, I use to work at a salon where I met a lady who was a client, I felt a mutual connection with her but I couldn’t ask her out due to not wanting to risk my job. I have recently moved and I don’t work at the salon anymore, I really liked this lady and I think she liked me too, she always booked her hair appointments on the same day as I was working, I remember her full name and I found the business where she works she works on the administration and picks up the phone, would it be okay to call the business and see if she picks up the phone and then could I explain to her that I like her and was hoping to see if she would meet me? Would this idea work or would it be bad could I get into trouble if I called her? Any help would be greatly appreciated thank you
Can I call the business where a lady works where I met at my old job I really liked her but never got my chance to ask her out?
I wouldn't recommend calling her workplace to ask her out. Here are a few reasons why:
- It could make her feel uncomfortable or put her in an awkward situation at work. As you said, you met her as a client so she was there for a service, not to be approached romantically.
- Her coworkers or boss may overhear the call and it could create gossip or problems for her at her job.
- She has no way of knowing your intentions are good since you're a stranger now calling her work number instead of contacting her directly.
My advice would be to gently let this one go. If you truly felt a connection, maybe leave it up to fate that you may run into her organically somewhere public where you can politely say hello and see how she seems to respond. Calling her at work risks coming on too strong and potentially jeopardizing her professional environment. Sometimes it's best to let things be if you can't properly ask someone out respectfully in the setting you met. But I get you really liked her - maybe just keep your eyes peeled if you're meant to reconnect someday!
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Asker
3 mo
Hey there, thank you for your message I understand all of what you’re saying I can’t tell you how frustrating this situation is I will never bump into her again I have moved to a different location I know that her boss is not in the same place where she works she is just the one I think I don’t think that there will be any one else in the office would this change this situation?
I don't know man, it still seems kinda sketchy. Like yeah her boss might not be there, but the other people she works with could still tell her boss about some random guy calling asking her out. And she's at work, she's probably not looking to date while she's trying to get her job done.
It just has a creepy vibe, you know? Like she didn't give you her number for a reason back at your old job. I'd say let it go and find someone new. Maybe you could snoop around on social media and see if she's single, then try sliding into her DMs. But calling her work is def gonna come off as stalkerish no matter what. Her coworkers will probably think so too. Just move on and meet someone else, your old crush ain't worth the risk man.
Alright man, look I get it, unrequited crushes suck. But hear me out - calling her work really is a bad idea. Here's why:
- It'll put her on the spot unexpectedly while she's gotta be professional at her job. That's super uncomfortable.
- Even if her boss isn't around, her coworkers will know you called and asked her out. Word could get back eventually.
- She didn't give you her number back at your old job. That's a sign she wasn't interested in dating you then.
- How's she supposed to say no politely with others around? That's just awkward.
Instead of calling her work, is there any other way you could try contacting her outside of the office, where she isn't on the job? Like finding her on social media and sending a polite message? At least then she isn't surprised at work.
I know it sucks man, but trust me, surprising her at her job isn't gonna get you anywhere good. You gotta let this one go or find another way that's not so public and uncomfortable for her. Don't wanna creep her out or get yourself in hot water, you feel?
This sounds like a fairly innocent attempt on your part. Call her workplace and ask for her. Explain who you are. It appears she'll remember. If she isn't available, leave your phone number for her to return the call.
You'll find out if she was actually interested or if it was just a pleasant client/worker relationship. Good luck.
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3 Reply
Asker
3 mo
Thank you for your help yes this is a innocent attempt on my part I never got to chance to ask her out I have a good feeling that she might would I get into trouble for calling her work place when I met her at the salon that I use to work at?
Nah. You no longer work there. So it's not inappropriate.
It's like the teacher/student thing. You can't go out with YOUR student. But when the student graduates, nothing wrong with it. There are no conflicts of interest.
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I wouldn't recommend calling her workplace to ask her out. Here are a few reasons why:
- It could make her feel uncomfortable or put her in an awkward situation at work. As you said, you met her as a client so she was there for a service, not to be approached romantically.
- Her coworkers or boss may overhear the call and it could create gossip or problems for her at her job.
- She has no way of knowing your intentions are good since you're a stranger now calling her work number instead of contacting her directly.
My advice would be to gently let this one go. If you truly felt a connection, maybe leave it up to fate that you may run into her organically somewhere public where you can politely say hello and see how she seems to respond. Calling her at work risks coming on too strong and potentially jeopardizing her professional environment. Sometimes it's best to let things be if you can't properly ask someone out respectfully in the setting you met. But I get you really liked her - maybe just keep your eyes peeled if you're meant to reconnect someday!
Hey there, thank you for your message I understand all of what you’re saying I can’t tell you how frustrating this situation is I will never bump into her again I have moved to a different location I know that her boss is not in the same place where she works she is just the one I think I don’t think that there will be any one else in the office would this change this situation?
If u can never meet her what are u trying to achieve
What do mean?
I don't know man, it still seems kinda sketchy. Like yeah her boss might not be there, but the other people she works with could still tell her boss about some random guy calling asking her out. And she's at work, she's probably not looking to date while she's trying to get her job done.
It just has a creepy vibe, you know? Like she didn't give you her number for a reason back at your old job. I'd say let it go and find someone new. Maybe you could snoop around on social media and see if she's single, then try sliding into her DMs. But calling her work is def gonna come off as stalkerish no matter what. Her coworkers will probably think so too. Just move on and meet someone else, your old crush ain't worth the risk man.
I appreciate your help but your too like oh it’s too risky let’s just leave it when sometimes you can’t
Alright man, look I get it, unrequited crushes suck. But hear me out - calling her work really is a bad idea. Here's why:
- It'll put her on the spot unexpectedly while she's gotta be professional at her job. That's super uncomfortable.
- Even if her boss isn't around, her coworkers will know you called and asked her out. Word could get back eventually.
- She didn't give you her number back at your old job. That's a sign she wasn't interested in dating you then.
- How's she supposed to say no politely with others around? That's just awkward.
Instead of calling her work, is there any other way you could try contacting her outside of the office, where she isn't on the job? Like finding her on social media and sending a polite message? At least then she isn't surprised at work.
I know it sucks man, but trust me, surprising her at her job isn't gonna get you anywhere good. You gotta let this one go or find another way that's not so public and uncomfortable for her. Don't wanna creep her out or get yourself in hot water, you feel?
This sounds like a fairly innocent attempt on your part. Call her workplace and ask for her. Explain who you are. It appears she'll remember. If she isn't available, leave your phone number for her to return the call.
You'll find out if she was actually interested or if it was just a pleasant client/worker relationship. Good luck.
Thank you for your help yes this is a innocent attempt on my part I never got to chance to ask her out I have a good feeling that she might would I get into trouble for calling her work place when I met her at the salon that I use to work at?
Nah. You no longer work there. So it's not inappropriate.
It's like the teacher/student thing. You can't go out with YOUR student. But when the student graduates, nothing wrong with it. There are no conflicts of interest.
Go for it and good luck.
Thank you so much I feel so much better now I was worried about that I thought it would be ok because I don’t work there anymore