How TF do I get a girlfriend?

[Rwee123]

I'm 22 years old. I have had next to know experience with women (and no relationships lmao). I have anxiety, go to school online, and am in a small friend group.

I think my main issue is the anxiety part, it can detract from my natural confidence (especially because I have no experience).

To respond to some of the obvious answers:

I am already comfortable being alone. Have been for years now. It's been my baseline for a while, that doesn't mean I don't still crave human connection in this way.

I am working on myself, as I always have. I'm full time in school, working, and exercising regularly. I'm a pretty kind guy who generally looks out for others whenever I can.

I've tried online dating and suck at it. I'm terrible at taking pictures, don't understand what to say in the prompts, and have only really pulled a first date once or twice.

Any help would be awesome, I've wanted to fix this for a while and nothing really seems to be working for me.

[Oliverlogan263]

Here's what I'd say bro:

Sounds like you're doing all the right things by working on yourself and your goals. That anxiety is a bitch though, I feel you there. Dating can definitely make it way worse!

A few things that might help - try joining some clubs or meetup groups related to your hobbies and interests. Even if it's something small like a book club, you'll meet new people with a shared passion. Takes the pressure off from "dating" but still gets you socializing.

When you do meet a girl you vibe with, just be yourself and focus on listening more than talking. People love it when you make them feel heard. Compliment something specific about them too, not just looks. And kino - find excuses to touch arms when you laugh together. Ease into flirting.

Also try Bumble or Hinge where the girls have to message first. Puts less stress on you having to come up with an opener. Pictures help, so ask a buddy to take some candid shots doing your hobbies next time.

Courage is feeling the anxiety and doing it anyway, bro. You got this! Just keep putting yourself out there. Your perfect match is out there doing the same.

[CallmeTheKnight]

You just contradicted yourself big-time. You’re working on yourself, but you have not gotten any confidence from The process?
Anxiety is not an excuse. I don’t care what you. You and many other people say the same thing and eventually when you actually make the effort, regardless of the consequences, you will begin to have more confidence.
Working out is only going to do good as far as your overall health and allow you to look good, but it will not help you with your confidence socially.
You need to get out more, meet new people, approach women with the intention of getting to know them not having them as a girlfriend, there is no excuse not to improve your life by being social. Stop using anxiety as an excuse.

[DreamLife7]

Why would a girl want to be with a broke 22 year old that has mental issues? How much sense does that make? And the fact you think a girl should settle for you is insane. Get your life together

[Rwee123]

Lmao, that's a bit cold. What college student is rolling in money that didn't inherit it? I'm going to school, pursuing a higher education and working on my career. I've got my own apartment (which the overwhelming majority of my generation hasn't gotten yet bc of covid). Are you saying that because I have anxiety a girl is settling for me? How exactly should I get my life together to fix that?

[Nikki1989]

The same as anyone else, you socialize, meet people.

[Rwee123]

You're totally right, but there aren't a lot of options for socialization for me. I go to school online, and work isn't really a great option for finding dates

[Nikki1989]

You need a social circle. You must get some spare time.

[Rwee123]

I probably do need a different one. I have a friend group, but no interest in dating any of them and the group is relatively small

[Avicenna]

Keep talking to women. Most of the time, getting a girlfriend is a matter of pure luck

[CozyCoffin]

I don't know. All the usual advice didn't work for me. It's considered a numbers game, so try not to take it personally, and just keep on trying. If you can, just talk to a group of gals or even go to events, chat them up and see if you can make them interested. I tried various methods, cold approaching, online dating, a wingman, before setting into that for a while and ultimately deciding that wasn't worth all the years I spent looking. Fifteen years is enough. If you have the drive, keep going.

[slatyb]

You stop being alone. Find a mixed sex group to hang with. Say hello to everyone you meet. In the past two days I met two baristas and had a multi-minute discussion with them about music. I'm married and too old to date them, but if I were younger it would have been reasonable to ask them out. If they declined no problem. They have friends.

[91bryce91]

thats what hormones are for when young.
Makes you do dumb shit like asking a chick out, in the hopes you might play with her boobs.
But by 22 you missed that boat. Perhaps you're destined for gayness.
Which according to tv shows is socially acceptable now

[Squatting_Slav]

The best way is to focus on your goals, be successful which comes in all forms. Create your own purpose and path in life and you will attract women through that. Don't focus on getting a girlfriend it will set you up for failure

[KillinItHard]

Find a girl you like and throw poke balls at them. Works like a charm.

[TheSpaceGnome]

It's gotta be master balls though or it can fail.

[KillinItHard]

@TheSpaceGnome True story.

[FunkyMonkee]

Walk into a bar with hundred dollar bills hanging out of your pockets.

[AngryCarl]

Why do you need a girlfriend? Wouldn't that just cause you more anxiety?

[Rwee123]

Exposure to it would reduce the anxiety. But either way I just want to have that type of connection in my life

[boobliker]

it is try and see some like lots some don't like much at all, so ask each or try and see NO is stop.

[FlatLine4]

Be 6 feet tall, have a compact midface, have a good hairline, be white, don't have skin diseases.

[Jmmmfi4]

GET MONEY