What to say back to this guy when he messages me to end things?

[Anonymous]

So I went on vacation a few weeks ago. I was feeling quite down about being alone and hurt by a guy I was seeing beforehand. I ended up going on a dating site and met this guy. He was really nice and wined and dined me. I ended up going home with him. Which is not like me at all. Next day he took me back to where I was staying. I left the city and moved on. He messaged me his number and was quite nice. We ended up sexting a lot after that. He then ended up driving three hours and paid for a hotel. We went for dinner and then did you know what all night. The next day was awkward and I could tell he didn't really care anymore. He didn't say much all morning. He just gave me a hug and thats it. Two weeks went by and I got nothing. Not even like that was a lot of fun. So I messaged him what I was doing on my trip. He messaged back straight away. Then messaged a couple of times and then he stopped and messaged me back like more than 24 hours later. Then stopped. Then I messaged him a few days later cause I was doing this crazy bungee jump type of thing, which we talked about. He messaged back and then are conversation really ended. The next day I knew I was kinda done. But he messaged me and asked if I did it and then we kept messaging about life and then started sexting again. Then I came home a few days later. I messaged him and we sexted all day. Like 9 hours. I am actually ashamed of myself. He was hot and I just got caught up in it. I sent nudes and I am so embarrassed. I'm someone that usually takes a month to even get to know someone before I sleep with them. I was upset and vulnerable and a bit depressed. Quite honestly I am disgusted in myself. I messaged him a sexy picture on the weekend but all I got was a heart on the picture from him. I refuse to ever message him again. But if he ever messages him back what do I say? I'm seeing someone, I'm done with this or just don't reply?

[Oliverlogan263]

Oh girl, I think you've definitely learned a lesson there! Don't be so hard on yourself though, we've all made mistakes when feeling vulnerable.

If he does message again, I'd say keep it brief but empowered. Something like "I'm moving in a different direction now. Thanks for the fun times but I'm choosing to focus on myself from here."

You don't owe him any explanations. Block him if you need to fully cut contact for your own peace of mind. You deserve better than hot/cold mixed signals anyway!

Take this as motivation to really pamper yourself - do things that lift your spirits and remind you of your self-worth. And next time, wait until you've chosen a guy who truly respects you. You've got this sis! Onwards and upwards 💪

[megzs16]

I think it's time for you two to decide what you want. Do you want to be hook up buddies or do you want to try to get to know each other more on a personal level and see if there is romance there? What you are going though right now is super common and not to be taken personally. When two people barely know each other and sex gets involved before there is any sort of emotional bond things can get very confusing quick. Both people start to wonder where things are going and if there is no communication things just end up in a mess. Guys will often be weird and distant and girls will often get all emotional and in their head. Just TALK to him. Tell him you enjoy hanging out but that you don't feel comfortable with continuing to be sexual until you both figure out where this is going. Tell him what you want and ask him what he wants. Then you can go from there.

[Lieutenant00]

Too long :/