How do I respond to my boyfriend saying “I love you” if I’m not ready to say it yet?

[Anonymous]

We haven’t been dating for so long so I don't know what to say, I’m kinda scared he will get mad or hurt if I don’t say it back

[V_Injector]

I'm stuck on whatever this "dating" thing is...

I mean I hang out and fuck, but I don't do formal dates. Are you just hanging out and fucking and then just calling it a date?

I need to feel you on the inside.

It's not you and I'm not trying to take a jab at you... I'm just trying to understand what I'm reading in all these posts over and over. They mention this "dating" and I have no idea what that means exactly anymore. Am I taking you to McDonald's and opening doors for you, or am I playing a movie on Netflix while I re-arrange your insides?

What is this "date" exactly? Can you tell me? Is it just a hangout that involves me putting your hand on my penis? Or is it still some formal thing that has routines and examples I'm supposed to follow?

I'm just curious is all because a lot of you young people use this term "dating" and I'm confused because... what is a date to you young ones anymore?

[Asker]

Honestly I’m as confused as you are. A lot of people just hang out, fuck and call it a date. but for me it’s way more than that, we go on dates sometimes where we like go to restaurants or go to A baseball game or go out carting, something we both think is nice and funny, but sometimes we also just stay at home, make dinner, watch a movie or sleep over at each others and just hang out together. and ya sometimes things get intimate but it’s not like we just meet up to have sex then call it a date. But I know it’s like that for many young people and honestly I just think it’s sad that it’s the only thing people think of nowadays, not to judge or anything, people can do what they want, I just don’t think you can call it dating if u just meet up to have sex.
I don't know if that was the answer you were looking for but ya
Also I think I may need to talk to him cuz I honestly don’t know if we’re still dating or if we are in a relationship😅

[V_Injector]

It's a confusing topic. I mean when I was a kid it was like an actual thing... but everything changed or seems to have. Talking like late 80's and early 90's. It was a formal thing where people play dress up and then go out to eat while they try to impress each other. I almost want to ask the question on G@G, but I'm sort of scared of all the answers it would get.

Definitions changed... like in your case, you might be in a relationship and it's beyond whatever dating has become... I don't know. I wasn't in the socioeconomic camp to actually do dating until I left America and then with Japanese girls... they won't let you pay for their food, it was all 50/50 so I don't know. I missed the whole scene and by the time I returned "dates" was more like buying an escort.

But I still see the term used "date" all the time on this site but it virtually doesn't exist in my real life.

[Asker]

I know it’s really confusing nowadays, I’m a little confused too. I know some girls who just want to keep it casual and just have “fun” but I also know a lot who still want the romantic dates or flowers and all that. But I think most girls have different opinions about it.

If u want to ask just do it, u might get some wired comments but I also think u will get some good ones explaining it better than me.

We also split the bill sometimes or maybe he pays at the restaurant and then I pay if we go to the movies or whatever.

[Summeroflove]

With a honest answer. Just tell him you appreciate it. Be glad he is communicating with you. But you need to tell him that you love him as a person. But you don’t feel you’re in love yet and you’re not ready for that at the moment. Be kind about it but also be honest.

Because you can love him as a human being and think he’s great. But not be at the point of being in love yet.

[Princesspeach1411]

Be honest with him. Thank him and tell him you appreciate it. Explain to him that you are not ready to say it yet, but you hope you can spend more time with him to find out. If he truly loves you he will understand, if not, he isn't the guy for you.

[Pinay_ako]

If you’re not ready to say it, tell him. If he doesn’t understand, then that’s a problem. How do you feel about him? Do you like him only?

[DaveJord]

Honestly, I respect someone that does not lie. So honestly if you are not feeling that yet, the best answer is thank you. Most guys get the message.

I mean when I was younger, like in my early 20's I made that mistake. And the girl told me simply, we have not known each other long enough to be saying things like that. And yes, she was 100% correct... and I never made that mistake again.

[coachTanthony]

Give him a hug, say thank you and tell him you’re not there yet but you’re sure you will be soon. He should appreciate your honesty. Don't allow him to pressure you into saying it... if he acts poorly then that might be a sign of immaturity on his part and not a very hopeful future.

[bobby_bush_eater]

Just be honest, don't be rude about but also explain how much the importance of those words mean to you. That way it may sting slightly when you say that to him but if you eventually do love him and you say it he'll know your sincerity and it'll mean that much more to him

[Cheapskate]

You don't have to say it back. There is a lot of integrity in not saying stuff you don't believe. You can just accept his sentiment.

Anyway, actions speak louder than words.

[sheikalana]

Just kiss him and pull him close to you when he says it. Don't feel pressure to say it. You should never say it if you're not ready yet. It's fine.

[electromagnetic]

“Thank you. I admire you as a person and I cannot wait to see where our relationship takes us”

[Mr_twoface]

Either be honest and transparent about it OR say, 'That's so sweet, and I love spending time with you'.

[Sevenpointfive]

if he says it again just say "i know". don't feel obligated to return the sentiment if you don't feel the same way

[Anonymous]

When my boyfriend said it for the first time I didn’t know what to say either/how to respond so I was just like “me too” (more for the sake of responding) and just lightly laughed it off.

[justarandomperson_55]

Be honest, even if you say it now without you actually feeling it, it's complete waste. So just be honest and when you will truly feel it and say it, he will be the happiest person I'm sure.

[red324]

Just say awww thank you. Not everyone is ready at the same time. I'd only be scared that she would leave me afterwards

[Nikki1989]

You say nothing but thanks, I appreciate it.

[Anonymous]

Why are you even with him then? That makes zero sense to me.

[Anonymous]

Well don't say "thank you". I've learned women don't like it when you respond that way.😆

[litty736]

Hug him and if he awaits a response tell him how you truly feel

[Anonymous]

Go bang Chad some more, he will F the thought of your boyfriend right out of you.

[Alwayreckles93]

Easy called it quits. Break up with him

[jahaims]

By saying that to him

[Anonymous]

Why are u with him? How does he look

[whistlingwh0res]

Maybe you will if you say you love him