Does a man mainly gain confidence by talking to beautiful women?

Question

I realised recently now that I've gotten older, that the fastest way to get more confident is to create friendship triangles with a beautiful woman in the mix. I used to make the mistake of just talking to the woman i was interested in and trying to date her

blueonblack22 · Accepted Answer

If you are talking to beautiful women to challenge yourself because you find them intimidating that’s one thing. But talking to them because you think they are the only women worth your attention, time and effort is another.

Also exactly how are you talking to beautiful women? Are you talking to them the same way you would talk to a woman you are not attracted to.

I get the natural inclination to feel nervous and self conscious when talking to a beautiful woman. But guys screw up by putting up on a pedal stool. Some guys might intentionally act “teasing” even mean to attractive to put on a facade that their looks don’t impact them. That can backfire as well if you overdo. Women can eventually see through that.

Anyway I got some good advice from a bar manager I worked for in college years ago. If you meet a hot woman try to find a flaw in her. An annoying laugh she has, the way she dresses, realize she occasionally has gas like every human being does. Gross thought but the idea is it makes her human vs. some sort of goddess fantasy that your brain wants to trick you into believing. Once you accept she has flaws just like you do then it makes her more relatable.

A lot of women like to be worshiped but they won’t give back too. They see nothing wrong with taking the one way attention for their own needs. Don’t fall for that trap. Doesn’t mean you have to be mean/ignore them. But look at them and expect them to reciprocate/respect you the same way you would expect an average person too. Guys take too much shit from women here

CaptainOverthink · Accepted Answer

Confidence isn't a blanket you put over everything to make it better, then it's more likely false confidence, meaning; mirroring what looks like confidence by acting to get what you want.

True confidence comes from competence; so you get good at things by experience and truly understanding.
Which means confidence only exist subject to subject; being good a social stuff and talking to hot women can make you an okay communicator but it won't make you an awsome lawyer, boss, chef or bricklayer.
You can't be true to yourself meanwhile acting confident about something you know nothing about.

You can however be humble, upbeat and have an a growth-mindset. That don't make you confident but it puts you in the path to competence real fast.. and more importantly, the respect you get from those with real confidence is worth a lot to anyone listening.

I do think your approach there is probably legit a good one. Best way to understand people (women) is to befriend them.

DishLady · Accepted Answer

Why triangles? Sounds weird. If a guy needs a gimmick to feel confident then the confidence is only fleeting. A real man knows his own value, which is the source of his confidence.

IslaTheWitch · Accepted Answer

shouldn't confidence come from inside? shouldn't it be based on the person's personal traits and hard work in developing them?

ManOnFire · Answer

Does it  only  have to be just beautiful women? This is why guys mess up so much. They keep treating "beautiful" women like deities who you should feel honored or blessed to be able to talk to - and these women know this and use it to their advantage. You are not getting a leg up like you think just for talking to attractive women or wanting to be seen talking to them, it goes to their heads anyway and benefits them more than you think it benefits you. How about practicing confidence by talking to  all  kinds of women, regardless of how beautiful they are or not? The more women you talk to, the more you learn about women period, not just "beautiful" ones.

Anonymous · Answer

Hmmmm. I guess it depends on the guy.

I have some good looking woman friends. I wouldn't say I've gotten any more confident with other women by talking to them.

I can probably talk to many women - small talk, maybe. If I happened to be interested, then there's where I'd clam up. Trying to flirt, I'd be hopeless. Asking a woman out, or going for a phone number, I'd be at a loss. Getting their numbers (as friends) was not too tough, but again, it wasn't in a "I'm trying to hit on you" kind of way. Trying to attract them is different.

And even they are kind of "secondary friends" - I am friends with the boyfriend or husband, and they happen to be around. It's a "let's hang out as friends with a huge group of people" kind of way. Like if I asked them to help me pick out a new wardrobe or something... I doubt they would.

I think I know the basics of asking a woman out/being a good stable boyfriend. But knowing it and being able to do it (or being allowed to put it into practice) isn't the same thing. Just like if something makes sense on paper, it still might not apply to real life.

Purpleronnie · Answer

Nope , it generally doesn’t work like that. Sure you can likely give your self esteem a boost by challenging yourself to do something that is not within your comfort zone like talking to what you consider a beautiful woman, but feeling confident overall comes from your self belief in all your skills and abilities together with your weaknesses , from your complete view of yourself. When it’s false like a lie that you tell yourself to make yourself feel better it’s fragile and crumbles with a hint of external criticism.

Rating your whole sense of inner worth , belief and self confidence in your ability to talk to a beautiful woman or any woman would likely make you really dependent on constant validation in that area. Not sure that’s where any man wants to find himself.

VanillaSalt · Answer

“As I’ve gotten older” god damn spring chicken lol. I’m nearly double your age and let me say this… confidence is gain from succeeding. If a man can talk with beautiful women and they like him he’ll gain confidence but if they never talk to him again he’ll lose confidence.

TommyMountainFigure · Answer

I speak to anyyone without discrimination, if they want to talk fine, if not? Also fine.

I don't believe I'm better than anyone, and by that same token nobody is better than me!
My confidence I suppose though comes from not worrying what other people think of me!

McLlovin · Answer

Women are awesome, but they shouldn’t be your main focus in life. There are many things that can build your confidence without having to focus on a woman all the time. I know practice makes perfect , talking to a lot of women might make you more comfortable, but im saying its not all there is to life is just women.

Anonymous · Answer

It can but don’t rely on someone else to feed your ego. This is how some narcissists act. I’m not saying you are and yes I get this feeling too.

But find someone who loves you and makes you feel confident in yourself. Bur also pushing you to be your best self.

Luopio27 · Answer

Forget confidence. Guys who get with hot girls know what they are doing. Their mindset is more like a leader than a follower.

Plus, they are doing so well in their life that the presence of a girl brings no dependency. If the girl is your only hope for a normal life, you have already lost.

BonzoInBitburg · Answer

There's truth to that. I would put every woman in the friend zone first. It takes all the pressure off

Nikki1989 · Answer

Talking to people in general will make anyone more confident.

Jamie05rhs · Answer

You're technically right. However, this method does create it's own complications. Because you don't want to hurt anyone's feelings or break up a friendship.

Sasquach · Answer

Confidence is from experience - the feeling that it's worked before so you know you can do it again. Confidence can be gained regardless of how attractive your mate is

DrPepper12 · Answer

I think men gain confidence from talking to any woman pretty or not. Practice makes perfect but I like your idea of triangles smart

Anonymous · Answer

In a way of speaking. Guys learn c I nfidence by learning not to give a 💩 what women want. Sometimes that's talking to them. Sometimes that's taking enough rejection to the point it no longer phases them.

Ladsin2 · Answer

No. A man gains confidence from his success, his fitness, and what he can provide. Confidence in interacting with the opposite sex is in part due to experience in similar situations.

CaptainSmartass · Answer

"Confidence is an inane thing. You cannot learn it." - Arthur Daley. Simples...

LiamJHayden · Answer

I've never been shy, but I think you're pointing in the right direction. Just conversing with new people should work.

Empery · Answer

No. He is confident because he knows himself well. He can deal with rejections

Hispanic-Cool-Guy · Answer

It's an individual thing. I have talked to beautiful women and doesn't do ish for my confidence level.

Sharkstealth · Answer

If I talk to any gal its a natural high for me.

dudegreat91 · Answer

Can you explain what is "friendship triangles"?

Yamaal · Answer

Of course not, you have to build your self-confidence yourself.

BigManSAB · Answer

No! You gain confidence by getting respect from women not just talking

JonesT10Apr · Answer

yes we get confidence, like becoming friends make more best things happened in life

Chthou95 · Answer

No lol. If the woman accepts your advances its going to give you confidence

Anonymous · Answer

Confidence on what? Talking? Holding a conversation? Or just talking to someone you're attracted to?

NotSlowestSloth · Answer

I get confidence by rejecting them.

RedInnocent69 · Answer

Gain? No. But it does need practice.

Crazzyyworld · Answer

Just fuck~

jack1924 · Answer

Nonsense

Does a man mainly gain confidence by talking to beautiful women?

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

Does a man mainly gain confidence by talking to beautiful women?

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

We're glad to see you liked this post.