Why do guys get angry when ladies reject them?

[Anonymous]

You reject women that you aren’t interested or have feelings for so why are you giving us shit for it. I rejected my guy friends so many times and he would not take a hint. Some people said I should have given him a chance and don’t miss out on a great catch. I know I went to a dance with him but only as friends. He kept saying that I’m his girlfriend or says, “Are you my girlfriend?” This was back in middle school/high school. Even my parents ask him if he had a girlfriend and hinted to him that I am girlfriend material. I told my parents to stop! WE ARE JUST FRIENDS. Dad said to stop pushing him away and open my eyes that he is the one for me and that boy is in love with me. Well he was. I’m not going out with someone I have no feelings for. I know women react the same way when guys reject them.

[Oliverlogan263]

Girl, that's a super frustrating situation. I totally get why you're annoyed with the way that guy reacted when you rejected him. It's just not fair for him to get all angry and pushy about it.

I think a lot of guys struggle with rejection, especially when they've built up this idea in their head that you're "the one" for them. They can't handle the ego blow of being turned down. But that doesn't make it okay for them to put that on you.

You have every right to only date people you have genuine feelings for. Nobody should be pressuring you or making you feel bad for not wanting to be with them. That's just so disrespectful.

Even if your parents and others think this guy is a "great catch", that doesn't matter if you don't feel that way. Your feelings are the only ones that count here. Don't let anyone guilt-trip you into giving him a chance when your heart isn't in it.

I've seen girls react the same way when guys reject them too. It's just a really common human reaction, unfortunately. People have a hard time handling rejection, no matter what gender they are. But that doesn't make it okay.

You deserve to feel respected and to be able to make your own choices about who you date. Don't let this guy or anyone else make you feel bad about that. Stand your ground, girl. You're totally in the right here.

[Asker]

Thank you so much. You really understand! Plus my guy friend is seeing someone and I’m honestly happy for him. I really am.

[ohsheeT]

Not all guys are that way. Most guys look at it as a rejection... some guy don't they walk away with a red face but they understand. It's OK. Because if the girl doesn't want to be with them it's all good you can make someone like you.
So it's just meant not to be

But the guy who get bent out of shape. Most of them watch to much TV or they are spoiled fucking brats growing up. And always got what they wanted. Or they believe it's only there rules. And how dare you. Or. They are like the guys. That have sex with a girl for the first time.

They put it in pull it out get up get dressed and leave. Talking to his buddy's on the phone they'll them he's a stud. He just got laid. But the girl didn't even know how to do it and she sucked...

While the girls still in bed thinking he in the bath room asking are we going to do this or not...

And the guys who get so bent out of shape. Is probably the same type of guys

[Agape93]

They can't handle a no, and many lack the emotional intelligence to have any reaction besides anger.

[Asker]

Well bummer for them!

[Agape93]

And sometimes for us when we become the target of the anger and jealousy

[SteveSmith1985]

Yea do not listen to the toxic people who seem to be giving you the same terrible advice. Don't go out with the guy. You don't like him. End of story.

I'll disagree with women do this too. Women get sad when rejected. So do most guys.,

SOME guys get angry (to cover being sad... which would too vulnerable).

But there is no "good reason" any guy gets mad. It's not the apropritae response.

[Asker]

Right. Rejection is part of life and plus, it gives us a chance to find someone better or better for us.

[SteveSmith1985]

Yea! of course! everyone has a right to be with their FIRST choice.

This guy is not really a friend if he won't take no for answer.

(I missed that line when I read and replied the first time. I thought it was a friend your family was pushing onto you who was going along with it)

That's something he needs to understand and respect if he's actually your friend.

Let this guy be as mad or sad or whatever he wants. He has no right to you, if he isn't who you want.

(your question is making me wonder what country you're from. This seems olddd school)

[OneViewpoint]

You sound incredibly immature at age 25-29 and still talking about middle school? And you gave no example of this guy getting "angry", just continuing to pursue you like a puppy dog.

With that said about your own shortcomings, a lot of guys are super insecure and don't handle rejection well. They experience feelings of humiliation, rejection, and embarrassment. That's why they lash out in anger. It's a stupid response from immature personalities. It's best to avoid these people from the start.

A healthy adult male personality should make his intentions clear from the outset. A woman should feel free to accept his advances. Or not. Both should be polite and civil about it. There shouldn't be any nastiness on the part of the woman saying no thank you. And there should be no anger from the man receiving that reply. Just, thanks for being honest with me and I had to try, enjoy your day. On to the next one...

[Asker]

How am I being immature? He’s the one that’s immature! He should have taken a hint a long time ago. Now he’s seeing someone else and I'm so happy for him.

[OneViewpoint]

Wow, he should have taken a hint! But you never did and that's just fine. Like I said, self absorbed and insecure. That guy made the right choice. You're gonna struggle in life.

[Asker]

How did I not take a hint? Why are you calling ME out? I’m not the bad guy here. I’m not going to struggle you don’t even know me.

[Zack-Bann]

Take the hint?
Why didn’t You take the hint?


The dude was NEVER YOUR FRIEND


It’s always the same story over and over
Girl knows a guy has feelings for her and yet she expects him to fully suppress those feelings just because she doesn’t share them and be her loyal friend


It’s impossible


Every word he ever said to you was said for the express purpose of getting you to fall for him


Friendship requires trust and you can’t trust a guy who has ulterior motives


As for how to tell when your friend has feelings for you: that’s easy
Is he your friend? Yes
Is he a guy? Yes
Then he has feelings for you 99.99% of the time


In an effort to be different and unique and progressive we have a society full of gullible girls being influenced by literal snakes in the grass who don’t have the stones to take rejection like a man and move the hell on

[Asker]

Hey don’t call us girls and women gullible! It’s men and guys that are gullible! This why I’m single because love and crushes is way too damn complicated! Men take rejection way too hard. I understand being hurt and crushed is normal but gosh move on!

[Zack-Bann]

I didn’t dispute that

In fact I am agreeing with you

Rejection = move on

And yet in so many cases women will say “oh he’s my friend even though I rejected him last week”

And that, regardless of how harsh it sounds: is gullible

Why keep him as a fake friend? He already confessed.
And you didn’t want him.
Just tell him to get out of your life

If you did that you’ll see just how simple and uncomplicated dating can be

Pure, direct, honest

[Anonymous]

That's a misunderstanding on your part. It's not the rejection guys mind it's generally the lead on. MOST guys only ask out women that have given him an indication she wants to be asked out. So guys are on the look out for that sign. And when he sees it, chats her up, then asks her out, and she rejects him he feels played. And most of the time did play him. If that's NOT you, fine. Then I'm not talking about you. But this is a majority of women. Because women do not view the, "dance" the same as men. Women will flirt just to flirt. Men generally flirt with a purpose.

Hope that helps ya.

[Asker]

Look I see what you’re saying but you have to understand, I refuse to date someone else have no feelings for. People need to stop getting angry at people for rejecting them. Besides that was a high school dance. We’re adults now. I didn’t show hints that I am open to date him. I never wanted him to ask he out.

[Opinion Owner]

No, he really doesn't. I'll tell any guy that'll listen not to take a woman's rejection personal and swallow it. But I know how many women lead guys on. I'm not going to pretend like a great many of you don't do this. You need to learn to spot the signs and tell him you're not interested if you think he's getting that vibe.

[Shiprex]

Sometimes those around you know your needs better than you do and you're too immature to realise this. That's perhaps why your parents are suggesting you quit fukin around with people and settle down. But it seems you're not at that stage in your life. This dude may be what is needed for you.

[Asker]

I don’t want to settle down. I’m 26 not 36. I’m not even attracted to the guy and he’s….. well chubby and doesn’t even take care of his health. I like guys that take care of their health. I don’t like muscular but I do like toned looking men. Plus with a beautiful personality and whatever.
We were in high school when he likes me but I kept telling him we are just friends. I’m sick of my parents telling me that he is the man for me and I need to stop chasing after these good looking men and date someone that notices me for me. Not a man that notices me and pushes me away like I’m pushing him away. My dad said he’s trying to hint me that he is the man I’ve been looking for. I don’t want him.
Besides he moved in and he’s seeing someone else and frankly I’m happy for him. My parents said I should have taken that chance and now another girl got him and I’m going to REGRET it.
I may not be the best looking girl and I’m chubby as well, I’m actually working on my health so I can attract the men I WANT to have. Only chubby guys like me, well most.

[Shiprex]

If you're chasing around and putting out to guys who are just using you then that's not going to do you any favours in time. Settling down or screwing around aren't the only options. Being stable and building yourself will make you a better catch because you have realised your own potential. Those around you have wisdom and knowledge of you and others perhaps better than you. Not that this guy is the only guy but it may have been the best guy and if you encouraged him to be better then maybe he could fit into that same mould you're making for yourself.

[Asker]

So you’re telling me that some people notices things a lot better than me? I’m an adult and I know what’s best for myself but my sister told me not everyone knows what’s best for them and it’s good to have someone wiser to tell me. She also told me I need to start opening my ears and LISTEN because I talk too much. If it wasn’t for us wiser people I would have missed out in great things. She said I missed out on a great catch because I’m too busy chasing after men that won’t give me the time of day and ignore me. How about stopping, turn around, open my eyes and see that my guy friend notices me for me and he didn’t care if I wasn’t one of the hot girls or skinny girls. He loves me for me but I took him for granted for so long but glad I realized my mistake and being mature for being happy for him for finding someone who sees him for him.

[Shiprex]

Your sister is right. Being an adult that "thinks they know what they want and need" is the first signal you don't know what you need only what you think you want. It sounds like you have an ego that's gonna be the cause of your heart to be broken and that it's unfortunate you seem too stubborn (immature) to accept others looking out for your best interests as being worthy.

I'm saying they know you and they can see how you've become and that from an objective pov they want to see you content and happy. Maybe not this guy because it may be that he got tired of waiting for you and found someone else (settled) and that he's not gonna return to the heartache you caused him by ignoring and dismissing him because of things he could change with motivation.

[Asker]

I didn’t cause any heartbreak! Okay I did some but he did that to himself. He should have moved in a long time ago and he would get hurt so much! I’m frankly glad he found someone else and I want him to be happy and deserve to be with a woman that loves him for him, alright?
You guys and men take a female’s rejection so hard. I know women feels the same way when men do that but come in! There’s MILLIONS of people in this world!

[Shiprex]

He had set his first sights on you though and that his friendship will likely wane now he's gone is a loss for you too. The parents and friends around you that see you flitting about with dobbers using you for their own gratification won't be happy that you're frittering your youth away of diks who won't settle down and instead take advantage of you and lose respect for women in general.

[RedThread]

Fragile egos. It's normal to get rejected in life. We all get rejected at some point even if it's outside a relationship context. It's a normal thing. To be triggered by that and resort to anger just shows how poor they are at emotional regulation and self-control. They basically prove why they'd be horrible to be with.

[ImalwaysrightOK]

You sound like someone who lead him on so you could use him for attention and doing things for you. He should have cut you loose a long time ago.

[Asker]

What the hell? No that’s not what happened. Your just twisting up veering. Why do guys ALWAYS assume girls and women do this to guys? Guys do this to girls too. I did NOT lead him on. Even his best friend told me I’m just lead the poor guy on, never truly appreciated him and took him for granted and he’s glad he moved on to a girl that makes him happy.

[Anonymous]

You don't need a rocket science to figure this out, when people get rejected they feel unwanted, unworthy, and inferior and some people can't handle feeling like this so there emotional response is anger/to get upset.

[Asker]

Well yeah that’s normal

[Anonymous]

I don't get angry, I get sad. Basically, I don't even try, because I'm too shy, but I know they would probably reject me.

[scott04sa22]

I always take it as a grain of salt

[msc545]

Nobody likes rejection.