T or F, waiting for someone to choose you is a waste of time?

[Anonymous]

Yes

No

[MrOracle]

I think we need to clarify. Obviously two people need to choose each other or it doesn't work. But you can't just be completely passive and expect success - everyone has a role to play.

Men are normally the initiators, and that's what society expects, so men obviously have to take an active role if they want a relationship, but women also need to take an active role - it just looks different. For women, she must behave in an inviting, welcoming way towards any man she is interested in so that he will know that she is receptive to some conversation with him. We call these "choosing signals". In Victorian times, a lady would "accidentally" drop her hanky in front of a man she was attracted to, which became a pretense for an introduction. Today, a woman might look at a guy across the room and smile at him, but it's the same idea.

You can't sit reading a book or with ear buds in and ignore people and expect to be approached - you have to do your part just like everyone else.

Women can obviously dress or act in such a way that she is using her sexuallity to get attention, but that's only going to be sexual attention, not relationship attention. Girls who want relationship attention tone down the sexuallity and they present themselves in a natural way - tattoos, piercings, rainbow hair colors, and sexualized clothes all work against her if a relationship is the goal.

[ohsheeT]

Very very true I know girls that like a guy that the guys not ready to settle down yet he will tell her that and while they still have this type of relationship he will go out pick up on girls go home and get laid blah blah blah and she's just waiting for him and I asked her why

You showing you and proving to you exactly who he is and that you mean nothing to him really he might say that he likes you but the only reason why he's sticking around is because he doesn't want anybody else to have you well he's out doing his thing I don't think that's fair I don't think that's right and I think any girl that waits for a guy like that they're wasting their time and energy and they're going to get hurt anyway somewhere down the road from that same guy

[HollyK21]

In the words of an old male friend of mine who didn’t allow that sh*t: “you don’t get to pick and choose when I’m going to matter”.

[objective_calendar]

If you're not actively putting in the work and just waiting to be noticed by somebody it's gonna take too long

[Purpleronnie]

If someone has made it clear they don’t want a relationship, or they keep you in limbo while offering no commitment, waiting usually costs you time, opportunities, and emotional energy.

The exception is when there’s a genuine reason for the delay and both people have clearly communicated that they’re interested and working toward the same outcome. In that case, waiting can be reasonable.
So , wait for circumstances not for decisions. If someone already has enough information to choose you and still isn’t choosing you, that’s often the answer.

Takes both people to choose though !

[Anonymous]

True. But this is only relevant if you know how to discern a good partner from a bad one. A lot of people look for all the wrong things in a partner to begin with. So if you don't know what to look for it doesn't matter whether you wait or not. You're most likely still going to f*** it up.

[Nikki1989]

Why wait when you can make it happen? Laziness won't help you achieve anything.

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

I believe time can't be wasted when you enjoy spending it

[MissSunshine2]

I just ask them or wait for signs of flirting.

[WhitneySnow]

Depends on the circumstances. Who are you waiting for?

[Anonymous]

If she chooses you, maybe not. Unfortunately, it definitely is a gamble.

[jahaims]

Opinions are not true or false. Facts and fallacies are.

[smashleyy]

Yes. You should never wait on anyone

[lilBigPotato]

I think there's some truth to it.

[exitseven]

Yes, nobody would want to choose me

[LC75LC71]

T for M. F for F.

[Iron_Man]

Too long to wait

[leviopperman]

you're probably just ugly