Am I wrong for not ‘starting fresh’ after abuse with this new guy?

[Anonymous]

So I left a very abusive 8 year relationship. Started talking to a guy about 10 years younger than me enjoyed everything at 1st. Now he says I should just throw all my trauma from that relationship out the window & start a new slate with him because its a new relationship. H e also says being insecure is a turn off. Another situation I video called him to watch the 4th of July fireworks together because I am a big holiday person I love all that. He said it was stupid that what am I like 3 years old getting excited over fireworks. My question is am I wrong for not just forgetting everything & starting new. Or he is just saying he loves me while pinpointing everything that is wrong with me?

[Levin]

Yeah, I mean, the guy is already emotionally abusing you over the fireworks thing. That's not a way to speak to an intimate lover, or anyone really.

Have you ever been in a relationship where you've been treated with respect?

Also, the guy is emotionally retarded to think you can just wipe away what has happened to you that easily.

[Anonymous]

Maybe you aren't ready to be in a relationship, or you need someone who is more understanding. Personally, my own baggage has hampered finding a replacement.

[Anonymous]

This guy gives me a bad feeling. He is minimizing your abuse and belittling someone that makes you (and me) very happy. Dump this guy.

[AngryCarl3]

He doesn't like fireworks? Deal breaker, surely?

[Asker]

It's not about the fireworks its how he said what are we 3 years old to get excited over fireworks. Like it could have just said i appreciate it but I dont really care for fireworks

[Anonymous]

How many red flags do you want? Forget this jackass NOW before you get into another abusive relationship. Maybe you should seek some counseling first, because the stuff you bring up is painfully obvious.

[dudeinohio]

The new guy doesn't seem very nice. Its ok to start fresh; but letting go of trauma isn't as easy as he says.

[LC75LC71]

Yes you are. Don't keep making shit up! Your entire description is suspect..

[Asker]

What do you mean its suspect?

[LC75LC71]

You're lying.. Don't lie to me.

[Asker]

What am I lying about?

[Asker]

Ask for what details you want know im an open book

[LC75LC71]

8 year relationship only to jet to someone else 10 years younger? The age range don't match up..

[Asker]

Im 30 & he's 20. I was 22 when I got into my other relationship.

[Staximus]

This guy is an asshole , get rid of him

[Staximus]

Why did he not go watch fireworks with you instead of over the phone

[Staximus]

He should’ve taken you to a firework show or something.

[Staximus]

If this is just some guy you talk to on the phone and not see in real life, that’s not a relationship. He’s just some guy you talk to on the phone

[Asker]

I see him about 4x a week. He doesn't have transportation so I had told him to walk to the park but the way I was saying it he thought I was joking so didn't go.

[Staximus]

So he’s s bum. Don’t date bums

[Staximus]

So he’s a prick asshole and a bum dosser, get rid of him. He should want to go watch fireworks with you

[Staximus]

If you say you like fireworks, a guy should take you to the best fireworks show in town

[Anonymous]

😆😆😆