My female boss cried in front of me, what should I do?

Question

It was something of a shock because I always looked up to her as she always seemed to be cool-headed and professional, but yesterday after a fellow coworker quit she pulled me in her office to make me promise I will not quit on her and then started to cry and tell about her divorce and how people always leave, etc.
What should I do?
Pretend nothing happened?
Report her to HR?

Xoxocutekitty · Accepted Answer

Sometimes people just have a rough day and maybe embracing a culture where we're allowed to acknowledge this is OK.

I know everyone wants to think that there's this great separation of work and personal, but there very rarely is.

Your buddy is looking for a new job, your company is hiring, you'll put Two and two together and then boom, your buddy and you are sitting in a board room together.

People date co-workers, and people become friends by gossiping about other people being a hard ass or not doing their job correctly.

Some of the biggest 'decisions' aren't made in the office, they're made when people are having an honest conversation wherever that may be. When we see kids pop into a Zoom background or a manager forget to mute themselves talking to their spouse. As a junior employee, it's always nice feeling that someone is relatable, approachable, and not old school professional.

Sasha_Gee · Accepted Answer

Don't pretend like nothing happened. She's your boss and she's still a strong person. But strong people have limits too, you saw that rare vulnerable moment because it all became too much for her that moment.
She's your boss, but she's also still a human being, and she'd appreciate it if you support her, not as her colleague, but just as person, a friend.

ilovesunnydays · Accepted Answer

She is a human after all. Sometimes tolerance level is broken for most stable people. And its okay, we are humans after all. Right now, I feel you should just let her know you won't give up on her and hopefully you will mean it. But also, dont get too emotionally available, lest she falls in love with you. People going through loneliness are susceptible and sometimes desperate for romantic love. Keep a distance, yet be there for her, at least professionally. One more thing, please dont expect anything from all this, perhaps she will not be there like this when you need her someday. But, dont lose heart, your kindness will never go unrequited by the Universe. Cheers brother.

notwoke · Accepted Answer

Over the years I've probably had 50 engineers work of me and 90% of them have been male, but 100% of the ones who started crying at work were women, yet we keep up the charade about women being emotionally the same as men. You now know that if you use wisdom and cunning you can manipulate your boss for your own material gain. I don't know her persona, but there is a way you can interact with her to gain favor that you don't deserve without very much effort. Be careful you can also screw it up if you act stupidly.

Anonymous · Answer

Next time if you're truly uncomfortable with it let her know. Tell her you are in no place or position to handle it. And if she fires you after that you can sue her company.

But honestly do you have no heart. You're complaining someone opening up to you is like a crime or some offense. Next time just do what I stated above.

DubiousIntentions · Answer

Cry along with her. It will give you both a chance to get it out. But realistically, ignore it and give her some privacy, or maybe ask if she needs to talk about something. But... judging by the outcome I'm thinking it may have been a ruse. Poor way to ask someone out, but it seems to have worked, if it was indeed was the case.

DarkWinterNights · Answer

Just a one off situation I probably wouldn’t do or say anything. She’s sounds like she’s going through a tough time. A lot of people are. If it happens again or she starts making personal advances, I would let her know how uncomfortable it makes you. Don’t needlessly take it further than it needs to just yet,

Mangospacho · Answer

Turns out female tears are an effective way to manage. 😆 Why would you report it to HR? What would you report? That she has emotions? And that she made you change your mind by using the oldest trick ever? They’ll be proud of her that she retained an employee by breaking down in tears, which saved the company a ton of money.

OlderAndWiser · Answer

I thnk you should feel some compassion for her, be loyal to her, and not discuss it with anyone else at your job. She only did that because she trusts you; did she make a mistake?

Adam1978 · Answer

Nothing, you shouldn't be close to your boss. So your not her shoulder to cry on. So let her handle her situation on her own. Don't report anything. Don't even talk about it. Let her have her vulnerable moment without you making it worse.

My-lover · Answer

Bruh , you are in tough spot if you are too nice to her she might catch feelings for you because she's vulnerable now and she is leaning on you tread carefully.

It's like walking on mines, offering her food was good and basic deed it is nice of you.

Just go with a flow and just agree with what she says don't add extra remarks

Starla1234 · Answer

If she didn’t make you extremely uncomfortable, then just stay civil and nice to her, and kind of act like nothing happened unless she brings it up again

RolandCuthbert · Answer

I don't know. Have her arrested I guess. WTF? Is this a joke?

Honesttguy · Answer

Yea i just ignore their weak moments, shit happens i dont care thats life. Job is work u do it good and if u find something better u move. Its all about money in the end.

howhigh420 · Answer

Support her she's been there for you at work and you want her to be happy in her job yeah have a talk take a lunch break eith her and ask her whats up

whirled_up_girl · Answer

I work in a hospital so crying on occasion or seeing people I work with cry on occasion is pretty normal whether they are above me or not🤷‍♀️

Subarugirl · Answer

Why would you report her to HR? Did she do something wrong?  Honestly what is there for you to do? She cried.. people cry, it's part of being human..

Vegasrunner · Answer

Document the incident in an email just for CYA purposes. Do nothing else you're just an employee, don't allow her to make her problems yours. Be very careful of this type of woman.

MarkRet · Answer

She's having a tough time. We all do. Just tell her you understand, and be supportive of her as a boss.

joeblow123 · Answer

Get out of there as fast as you can. She has hit the psycho stage and everyone is a target including you. Don't let her destroy your work history get out now.

dustybiker · Answer

Everyone has a moment. Men get angry when emotional as they are often “taught” not to cry. Be the bigger person and let it go.

IMuser · Answer

Just forget that it happened. Consider it an emotional outburst

annabananna · Answer

I wouldn’t report her. If she does it again just calmly let her know that it makes you uncomfortable. It sounds like she was going through a lot and had a lapse in judgement. It happens to us all.

exitseven · Answer

sounds like you can use this situation to your advantage.

ArrowheadSW · Answer

She is human. Support her. She is going through tough times.

Flower7 · Answer

Just pretend nothing happened and go about business as usual.

awkward_author · Answer

Pretend it never happened, and move on. If she seems fine now, there's nothing else to do aside from that.

larry69 · Answer

Let it go. Seriously maybe her period or menstrual cycle caused her to cru. Not uncommon in women.  If a man cried like that then report him to HR.

Anonymous · Answer

From what I can tell? You are definitely not a good person for thinking to report her to HR, 'less you meant it as a rather insensitive joke or she's been rude to her workers (which I don't see is the case here).

AdithyaR · Answer

It's understandable that she'd be sad but the whole making you promise you won't leave thing felt very unprofessional.

Hellraiser1984 · Answer

Just tell hr the truth and they may suggest to her some therapists. She was upset not threatening you. .

jamesgoldman · Answer

Pretend nothing happened, best for your job security and for her professional standing

Twalli · Answer

It wasn't about someone quitting. She's going through a life crisis now. She'll be the person you respect once her life settles down again.

Nazgol · Answer

No, don't report. Just be understanding & compassionate. You can sympathize and leave it at that, no need for anything else

noohair · Answer

Respect that she had a moment of personal pain related to her divorce.  And she trusted you to share her vulnerable moment.

Juxtapose · Answer

Give her a little bit of slack and try and be there for her like a decent human being.

Tstrbrainer · Answer

Why are people trying to deal with it professionally?  That's a window dude, hit on her 😉

driven159 · Answer

just do your job she needs to fix her life not drag you in it

Fuentes · Answer

Sounds weird and she's tripping lol i would keep my distance or find a new job.

Anonymous · Answer

Do better at your work and get the job done. Ask for a promotion, if not given, quit. Be a gentleman and don't make a big deal of that moment.

Static_In_The_Attic · Answer

$$$ Ask her for a raise! $$$

Anonymous · Answer

Ask her for a raise and if she says no, quit

KrakenAttackin · Answer

Avoid her like the plague.

Neilbud · Answer

Except that she is human as well.

Ryfyle · Answer

Quit immediately and lawyer the fuck up.

munding · Answer

Act like you never. saw it. She still the boss

Joker_ · Answer

Have sex with her

boobliker · Answer

stay away from her

UdontNeedtoknow · Answer

take her job.

My female boss cried in front of me, what should I do?

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