(seriously help me) Why is my dad such a jackass? ... what the hell is wrong with him?

[Anonymous]

My dad is the biggest a--hole I have ever met in my entire life! I just moved out a few months ago and he somehow is still ruining my life. First of all my dad hates my boyfriend and his ENTIRE family for no damn reason. They have been nothing but respectful to him and all he does is disrespect everyone like a jackass. Anyone who meets my dad automatically hates him. I hate him. I always have because he annoying as hell. My dad went on today about how I should never have kids with my boyfriend and that his family is usuing me and he's using me, and all this crap. Then he criticizes me and yells at me because I dont want to go to college yet and that Im gonna be working at fast food places or stores.. who cares? He has been thi way my whole childhood. He is a very selfish and unsupportive person. He doesn't respect any of my choices and never will. He found a bucket list I had made way back in middle school and it said stuff like buy lingerie or some childish stuff. He yelld at me for it today and was like "thats some realy bad stuff" Im 19 for gods sake! He has never cared about my happiness. He always tries to destroy me and anything good that I have. He even tried to ban me from ever seeing or talking to my boyfriend before we moved out. He trie to control as much as he can. I am an adult and as you can see he is still being a controlling d*ck. He keeps saying im living like a homeles person and my life is a mess... why is he always putting me down? why is he so controlling? Does he have a mental illness or something? Please someone help me... and How do i cut all communications with him? I want him out of my life so he can stop ruining it.

[Erwin]

Too little information here. Is there an underlying reason why your dad hates your bf? maybe he looks like an a-hole or doesn't seem to have a proper upbringing? have you ever asked him?

Before we even go as far as "he doesn't care about you" I must first ask does he still support you financially? because it sounds to me like he actually has funds saved for you to go to college.

Parents fussing about their child's life is only natural. If he complained that you live your life like a homeless person MAYBE it is because you actually live like a slob. Some parents can be very controlling, that's for sure but you must know that any normal father would treasure his daughter greatly. That would sometimes lead to over-protectiveness but by no means it was done with ill will. I know fathers who are harsh towards their daughter (who are my friends) but they only do that because they want the best for their daughters. If they are harsh about their way of life, it's because they want their daughters to be a splendid human being who has their shit together. I also understand that young girls like you would like to think you're an adult and can make decisions on your own but sometimes your parents DO know better.

Unless he's actually being an abusive father towards you and your family, I would refrain from calling him an a-hole or conclude that he hates you or something.

[Anonymous]

To be honest...

I get the feeling you are wrong and immature. It may not be completely correct and very irritating when someone tries to control your life but the points he is making and the way you are saying it brings me to that conclusion.

I can't speak for your boyfriend and his family...

But stuff about college is definitely him trying to put you in the right direction. You are not really doing yourself much favor by working in fast food.

Lingerie... well keep in mind that he is a guy and does not share a woman's perspective. If your family comes from an eastern culture... it would be a bit unsettling to see a teenager or child fantasizing about sex... esp. for a father.

Even though you are legally and adult and at 19 you are grown quite a bit... in reality most people are extremely naive about the world. We still see the world through the kiddie version we do as the sub- 18 group.

[Asker]

no.. trust me it is exactly accurate. I lived through it..

[jimin]

I'm so sorry that's happening to you. Is there a way to cut off all contact?

[blue_sun]

Some people are just assholes.

Just cut him out, assuming that you wish to.

[kiler1000]

i'd rather have working at a fast food joint as opposed to being a stripper.

[Asker]

true... but they do make a lot of money lol

[kiler1000]

yeah, but at what price?

[apple24]

I don't know! he just dick!