My mom takes her anger out on me?

Question

Very often my mother screams at me over the smallest things. For example, today I forgot to turn on my brother's lizard's light, so when she returned from work, she screamed at me telling me that I never do anything, and that I'm such a stupid b*tch. In these situations, I've learned to remain calm and generally remain silent/talk in a level voice, however she yells her lungs out. Then, it usually turns into how her life is so hard, and why am I trying to be like my "loser, awful father." (My parents divorced a few years ago, but my mom has a boyfriend.) I told her I like my father, and she acts as if this is a crime. Since I forgot to turn the lizard's light on, she told me I was going to go live with my dad, and to pack my things. So, I went to my room and began packing, and she followed me in and continued yelling the entire time (I think she was surprised that I was actually packing.) While I was packing (saying nothing due to her constant screaming) she said to me "You don't even know how much it hurts my feelings when I have to hurt your feelings." Everything always turns into poor her. I know this post was all over the place, but I really needed to vent. Does anyone have any advice, please? My brother is leaving for college next year, and I don't know how I'll be able to survive being stuck with her for the next few years (until I'm finally free in college.)

FoxyBoi75 · Accepted Answer

I am in the same exact position except my mom doesn't have a boyfriend and I'm the older brother. I have two jobs and I have to take care of my sister, clean up around the house, and whenever I missed the smallest thing either on my sisters school work or on cleaning up around the house she always does the same thing, yell uncontrollably. I've talked to my family members about it and the more that I try to help my mom with the aid of my aunts and uncles the more mad she gets. in fact she's now thinking about moving away from all family in general. I honestly have no idea how to deal with this but just remember that there are people that are going through the same things that you are don't feel alone.
PS I am so happy that you posted this, it has helped me so much just knowing that there are others out there with the same exact problem.

johnnyB3 · Accepted Answer

Sounds like you're mom is dealing with quite a bit of stress and taking it out on you is her way of coping with the stress. I would suggest talking to some family members, if your mom has a sister or brother I would think they would be the best to talk to as they would know her very well. Also they would know how to talk to her/what to say

also good on you for remaining calm in these situations

Goodwifie · Accepted Answer

Sounds like she is full of spite.  She shouldn't be taking her hate of your father out on you.  Talk to your dad and let him know that you feel better when you live with him.

knight_55 · Answer

Live with your father only if you are really sure of him.  Your mom's anger can be due to many reasons. It's best to keep away from her till she calls down.