Do you think kids are very much important in married life?

[Anonymous]

Me and my wife never planned to have kids. I often see people asking me why don’t you have kids. Does that really matters?

[ohshee]

You asking the wrong people you need to be asking yourself that what does it mean to you what would it mean to you for me when I was 1 year old my parents got divorced when I was 2 years old my mom got married to another guy and I thought he was my dad until I was 5 years old and my cousin told me he was not my dad he was my step dad so I went and I asked they told me the truth I'm kind of angry and probably from 5 to 10 this guy used to beat me with a belt if I did anything wrong they got divorced when I was ten when I was twelve she got remarried when I was 16 I moved out can I been on my own ever since I went got a lot of long roads the wrong path but I would not change anything for it ever I got married she got pregnant and I was always worried did I wasn't going to be a good dad we were in the midst of getting divorced when she got pregnant but always wondering who I was in life I was not going to have my son go through this he was the best thing in this world for me and him growing up taught me all about life I mean I'm sure that I knew something but I got to see it Through The Eyes of a little boy he is now 23 6 ft 7 a fireman paramedic and I'm so proud to this day if he sees me in the mall or something he still calls me Daddy he doesn't care who's around he walks up to me gives me the biggest bear hug as we talk and we walk away he was charging says I love you Daddy it was one of the best experiences that I've ever had I feel bad for him his girlfriend wanting to get married and have a baby and he said he would marry her but he did not want to have the baby because he saw the hell that I had to go through with his mother just to see him just to hold him I mean it was a battle there for a while but it is the best thing in this world whatever happened to you I would not change one thing if I had to go through the whole thing again I would do it in a heartbeat

[DonkeyDan]

When I was in my 20s i really wanted kids just wasn't with the right person.
By the time i was married at 32 it wasn't that important for me and my ex wife. We did try for a bit but it never happened for us and we were ok with that. By the time I reached 35-36, I really wasn't that bothered about having kids, and I'm glad now that we didn't. Now she is with her current partner they have been trying but still can't have kids. She has now been told that she can't conceive due to a medical problen that she's always had but never knew about.

[weysally]

no it doesn't matter, its up to you two whether you plan to have children, no more than say a couple having one child or the couple that just keeps on having them,
marriage isn't about children, its about two people wanting to share their lives together
there is to my mind a lot of off links to this question, like,
which is more important, good and happy life together or just a fantastic sex life together,
one can always have a sex life, but not so many have a nice happy marriage together,
if you like me have both then that is a good world to be in

[jennifer_bloom]

I think kids have multiple benefits for a married person - they give you a chance to love and take care of them - they give you a social venue when your older and too weak to take care of yourself or seek out your own entertainment through things like dancing or skiing or weight lifting. But it’s your choice whether you have them. My aunt says if you don’t believe you can offer your child proper attention and care either due to business or other reasons, it’s better not to have any children at all.

[lilyanony1]

I don't think I've ever really thought about not having kids If I married someone.
I guess tradition has taught me marriage is the unifying bond to legitimise our way of life in the eyes of the Lord and children are a bi product of our bond.

It's old fashioned yes.
But it's something I guess I aimed for.
Now I'm Older I don't know if that will happen.
I also don't think people should feel pressured to do anything.
I also know some people can't conceive would that make them an abomination?
No... let people be

[SenseiSeptred]

You taken though?

[lilyanony1]

No I'm not

[SenseiSeptred]

Is that a picture of you with your hair either completely covering up your face, or are back facing the camera? Either way if it is your hair looks wonderful.

[lilyanony1]

Thank you

[Anonymous]

I think it's all a matter of personal preference. My boyfriend and I have talked about it, and we're both 90% sure we don't want kids. As for what everyone else thinks, people are always going to butt their noses into other people's lives, but it's really none of their business. As long as you and your wife are happy and the kid-less life works for both of you, that's all that matters.

[Asker]

Thats great. Even we had discussed it together and took this decision

[Opinion Owner]

There's more to life than having kids. My boyfriend and I love to travel, and we have a LOT we want to see and experience in our lifetimes. I still love kids, but I also have plenty of nephews and nieces to dote on without having the 24/7/365 responsibility of raising kids of my own.

[humpbackjack]

It’s a very personal decision whether to have children or not. I love my girls and wouldn't want to imagine my life without them maybe do with a little less drama but overall my girls were great kids but nowadays if I was just starting out with my wife and no kids I wouldn’t want to have kids because of how society is heading especially here in the US it’s fixing to get pretty desperate and it will be hard enough to take care of yourself and your SO it will be heartbreaking trying to protect, provide shelter, provide food, provide water, provide the basic needs not to mention giving them a means to have a normal or even close to normal childhood so to each their own when deciding such things and everyone will have their own reasons for their decisions

[RealMarek]

They’re only viewed as unimportant to married life when a civilization is in decline like the West is now or like Rome was during its imperial phase. At all other times they are desired by default. The societal consequences for many Western millennials will be such that many will endure neglectful care and painful, premature death. As for personal consequences to the marriage, it depends on the couple. It is important to be aware that many women who convince themselves that they don’t want children come to regret it in their 30s or 40s. If a man was one who was reluctant and she went along with it only to regret it later, it can have devastating consequences for the relationship.

[Lliam]

I never had any interest in producing a family or being responsible for kids. I lived my life having fun, not being shackled to the raising of kids.

I didn't think about finding a life partner and settling down until I was in my mid-30s. I finally got married to someone I could see myself spending the rest of my life with when I was 42. At that point, my wife was 40. We had met two years earlier. We've been happily married now for 25 years and are both glad we don't have kids.

[RobT312]

No not necessary…. It’s personal preference.
if you want them then great, if you don’t then you shouldn’t. Parents need to want to be parents. I personally want them!

[Asker]

I don’t know what makes people to ask this question, but everytime they are like do you have kids?

[RobT312]

Yup. I think it’s a way to start conversation…. when in doubt, ask about kids! I was recently at a conference with a ton of people who did know each other and think I was asked the kids question 5 times

[Apple1996]

Marriage or not. Kids do create a unbelievably strong bond between two people. This is why you see split couples with a child still connect with each other even tho they are not together. I think kids are important and those that don't have them are missing out but that is completely their loss.

[Cherry234]

It really doesn't matter whether you have kids or not. If you don't want to have kids, it's your decision. Some people have children for selfish reasons (e. g. wanting to continue their family name or having someone to take care of them when they get older). You're not hurting anyone with your choice. People really need to mind their own business.

[just_a_potato]

No it doesn't have to be important to the marriage. You're still a family, just a childless one. I personally always wanted to be a mom though so children within marriage is kind of a requirement for me.

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

I think having kids can come with a big package
some kids can be good and some can be bad
some will beat kids up at school it all depends
and it's a scary situation and some can be bullies
In my opinion, this is one to think over and some
people have pets in replace of kids

[DARKCLOUD1945X]

I think some people know they are not suited to be parents for too many reasons to list. They are happy with that. Others have a strong want for a house filled children. and the more the merrier. Then you have people who think a child will help a broken or failing marriage and kids are not a good option, who am I to say just putting it out there as food for thought.

[Aerissa_Jade]

They are important if the couple thinks they are. If they both want them or don't, that is what matters.

[t-8900]

Yes. They are half of her and half of me woven together into new life. Sharing our blood, our love, and our happiness.. Children are the ultimate blessing 💓

[melanieeeB]

No, only if you both want to have kids but you can for sure be married and have no kids.
People should only be making kids, if they really want to have kids! Otherwise the kids won't have a nice childhood

[Luckycharms12]

Kids don't make people happy got be happy already then if both want kids go for it. If not that's okay to people need mind business at the best of times

[nowama]

Nope. Not at all. I'd prefer just being with the guy I love over worrying about creating an unnecessary (to me) life.

[Interstate]

The world is overpopulated enough as it is. KUDOS!!!

[Interstate]

Not everyone is meant to have kids, so I believe NO. If it were that important, everyone Married would have them.

[exitseven]

Kids are not for everyone. They are a huge responsibility and take boatloads of cash. There is nothing wrong with not wanting to take on that kind of responsibility.

[MORPHEUS_12]

Never wanted crotch goblins. My husband of 23 years never wanted kids either. We are childless by choice.

[JCrockett]

Why would you even get married if you weren't planning on having kids?

[Asker]

Is marraige only about kids?

[JCrockett]

Not exactly. But it's about forming a legacy, i. e. A family. If your family isn't going to exist beyond your generation, why even bother with a lifetime commitment?

[Asker]

After marraige my wife got into bodybuilding and thats when we decided not to have kids for her passion. She has been doing bodybuilding from last 6 years and would not want to loose her years of hardwork and dedication.

[JCrockett]

A couple more years of unsightly muscles versus the undying light of seeing your own children grow into adults and continue your bloodline.

Hmmm... Tough call.