Is it normal to keep yourself or to not entertain or really bother with your mum when she’s nasty when she’s mad?

[Anonymous]

Like with my brother she treats different even if she’s mad at him which is rare now that he’s older and he’s a responsible adult who’s helping her keep the house over our heads, financially. But anyway my point is when my mum is mad she’s like verbally abusive like from calling me a bitch to a cunt or whatever or a pussy or I’m acting like one because of the way I do things… Now as a daughter I can admit I’m not perfect but most of the time she lashes out she overdoes it I feel from my perspective and I’m like used to her calling me names but it’s boring hearing it. Even make comments about my life and what I’m doing like… Lol I could be here all day but I don’t know it’s a lot to deal with tbh. Like after my mum lashes out on me I just keep my distance cause in my head, just leave me alone be. Just the way she talks about me I get the impression she looks down on me but then when she’s in a good mood or on good terms I’m doing good for myself or keep it up but once I have an opinion that doesn’t suit her it’s something different because it’s her house and I get that to a certain extent but not to the point of what I believe and how I do things. She wants to control the way I do things so it suits her but realistically… lol again it’s a lot😪

[stacybutlerwashere]

So... What exactly is your question?

[Asker]

I kinda just asked it… Is it normal to keep your own distance between you and your mum because she’s mean when she’s mad?

[Asker]

Well no is it normal to keep your distance with your mum when she’s mad at you? Everything else is in reference to the question so put it this way, is it normal that “I”…. Keep my own…?

[stacybutlerwashere]

Yes, of course it is normal. Everyone needs their space for various reasons and avoiding conflict is certainly better for both of you initially. If you feel their are certain recurring problems that arise then perhaps, after giving\receiving space to cool down, you could sit down and discuss them calmly and rationally. But if you do, be prepared for her to mention some issues she may have with you as well. don't take possible constructive criticism as a personal shortcoming. But yes it is totally normal to want to stay away or be alone sometimes.