I sorta threatened my parents and I don't know what to do now?

[Anonymous]

So im a teen (girl) and i have a difficult relationship with my parents. Like anything i or my siblings say or do will trigger them. And my sister who's older than me is literally depressed and does self harm because of them, but they don't admit that it's their fault (but at this point i don't even know if it is their fault..).

So a couple of hours ago, I went to go eat breakfast and my parents kept saying mean stuff to me so I got annoyed and went to my room. A couple minutes later, my parents came to my room and started getting mad at random stuff and then they threatened to cut off all my hair (my hair's kinda long) and they looked really serious and I think my mom was going to get scissors. So I have this bokken (wooden sword) in my room and when my parents started coming closer to me, I pointed the sword at them and told them that I'd use it if I had to. They got super mad then left my room. I went to take a shower after and do my homework and everything was chill after that but my mom is still really mad and won't talk to me. My dad's not home so I don't know if he's still mad. So I tried talking to my mom, and she started saying again how she's gonna cut my hair, so I went back to my room and cut off a bit of my hair. When I showed it to her, she said she didn't care and that she was mad at me cuz I pointed the sword at her. So yeah guys I have no idea what to do, or if I deserve it that nobody is talking to me anymore (my siblings are also mad at me).. Any advice?

[TrueConfection]

Think about what they were saying. Was it that they want you to do more around the house? Your grades? Your friends? Did you hoard the hair care products and your siblings didn't have anything when they needed it? Fighting over bathroom time?

You didn't give many details. Think about what they were upset over and try to think of a way you can compromise or give in even if it seems unfair to you. Take a giant leap in a mature way and see if they respond.

[Asker]

What kind of mature way? How do I make myself seem more mature in front of them?

[TrueConfection]

It's how you react. It's hard to give you an example of a mature reaction without knowing the story, but cutting your hair is not it. Saying, "Ok," and just doing what they've asked (without protest) when it means a sacrifice for yourself, is an example of a very mature reaction and it should go a very long way.

[Asker]

Oh I see! Thanks for the advice!

[TrueConfection]

I'm not trying to be mean. I'm trying to help from a parental perspective. I also had crazy parents that would cut my clothes into shreds among other things. I only wish someone had given me the advice to be more mature than them. When my own teenagers and I go a round or two, they win the moment they quiet down and do as I'm asking, even if they don't agree. I'll give them the moon and the stars when that happens.

[Doom880]

Whoa, did your parents just come out of nowhere, threatening to cut your hair, just because they didn't like it or something you said? Not good at all, it's your body your choice
But, you also need to learn to control your anger. Next time they attempt something like this, just report them to the authorities

[Guy13]

Praying may be a good idea. I’m sorry may be a good idea too? Have you considered contacting counselor for discussion about things?

[Asker]

My parents get disgusted or something when I say I'm sorry and I'm not sure about counselor stuff...

[Iron_Man]

You’re a female what’s wrong with long hair nothings wrong with that

[Asker]

I don't know my parents just hate it..

[Iron_Man]

How old are you now

[Iron_Man]

Why don’t you go off to college or join the Marine Corps and get out of there and make your own life

[Asker]

Nah I'm still in highschool, but I really wanna move out the second I have the chance. I accidentally said that to my mom one day and she got mad... 🥸

[Iron_Man]

When you graduate high school when you hit 18 you’re free to do what you want but try to have a good relationship with your parents no matter what happens that’s extremely important

[Asker]

Thanks for the advice!

[Iron_Man]

You are so we

[Iron_Man]

Welcome

[slatyb]

You need to get the hell out of there.

[Avicenna]

Talk to them once all of you have cooled off

[AssholeNumberOne]

Call child protection services. This is not good.

[In_Trance]

I think you need professional help

[Asker]

It's not worth it. There are people going through so much more than me and they are the ones that really need professional help.

[In_Trance]

They're not you and that's an irrational point of view. If it's not worth it then you need to look around and realize this is as good as life's going to get

[Asker]

I already know that.. 😊

[In_Trance]

Then I really don't understand why you asked this question

[Asker]

Cuz I just wanted to know how I could get my parents to start talking to me again and tbh I doubt professional help would make it any better

[Doom880]

I agree her reaction was over the top and she needs to learn to control her anger, but her parents seem a bit oppressive too, based on the context provided. Tbh, I think the whole family would benefit from counseling

[Sketti2021]

Y'all need counseling