Should I stop reaching out to my friend who has left me on "read"?

[Anonymous]

I feel kinda worthless right now... and I feel a bit unworthy of my friend's attention. My friend and I met on the internet like 8 months ago. Started talking on a website, and then we eventually started following each other on our personal social medias (that's where we talk now).

My friend has left me on read a few times lately. The first time seemed to have just been a misunderstanding (but I got replied to half a day later). The 2nd time, my friend was probably just busy because I got a response to my text like 2 hours later. And this is it, I got left on read yesterday. Still haven't received a reply and it's been like 15 hours since then.

My online friend and I have some hobbies in common but now that I can see their social medias, I realize that it is a much different person from what I was expecting. My friend's popular, goes to parties, spends a lot of time outside... while I don't do any of these things and frankly, I'm quite a lonely person or, in other words, a "loser". And I don't know, it makes me feel unworthy of their attention. I always feel anxious whenever I send a message (I'm afraid of bothering/annoying my friend due to the push notifications). And I feel unwanted. Maybe my friend still cares but just takes me for granted, I don't know, but I feel very sad about the whole situation.

So should I stop texting my friend and see if they ever initiate? Maybe my friend will miss me someday (since we used to talk almost everyday for like 6-7 months). But well, my friend did initiate a lot of times in the past (on the other website that we used to chat). But not yet on the social media (though, we have been texting there for only a few days).

Yes

No

[AmandaYVR]

If you reach out and don't get a response, then sure, you can stop reaching out.

But the bigger picture is that there are lots of reasons why people don't respond, and it doesn't always mean that they don't like you, don't value you. I can speak on this personally, but it's hard to explain. I don't like talking about my day to day life, and even answering a "How are you?" is too much for me a lot of the time. And sometimes things are so bad that I don't have the emotional room in my brain to take on any more. It's much, much, easier to think more abstractly, or to consume media that interests a person, than to dedicate one-on-one time to conversation. A lot of people are getting swept up in the pace of life, and they are very distracted. There's lots of other reasons too.

If he/she's very social, maybe she is busy with other things, and other people, and you are not top priority. So that's your prerogative to walk away, or back off. But friendships come and go all the time, and it's not easy to match up perfectly on preferred modes, and frequency, of communication. I would caution you not to write them off completely. With some friends, it can be months that go by, but when you do talk, it's picking right back up where you left off.

[Guy13]

I woukd…simply disrespectful. Nevermind the explicatives I’m thinking 🧐 😠

[Asker]

What do you mean?

[Guy13]

I hope this is easier to get. It would upset me personally so I would not do it. It would get me angry 😠 😠😠. They would not hear from me again. It’s disrespectful. And Done ✅

[Imsmurter1]

social media is always awkward try to talk to her in person.

[Asker]

I can't. We're just online friends and my friend lives in another country.