I've been called selfish because I chose drinking over helping out a friend and I don't know if I'm truly in the wrong here?

[Anonymous]

My friend has been asking me to go down and help her out by bringing her grocery shopping. She doesn't have a license (she is 31) because she is terrified of driving so she is very much reliant on literally everyone. Usually I don't mind helping her out but I'm done this week. It's only Wednesday and I've had a fuck of a week. She lives an hour from me.

So basically I got home from work a half hour ago and I decided that I'm going to have a few drinks. Picked up a 12 pack. I've had one. She calls me like ten minutes in to me being home and asked if I could bring her today versus Friday to grocery shop because apparently she has nothing in the house to feed her kids (she has food but her kids won't eat it because they are picky as fuck). I told her no, I was drinking tonight. She originally just laughed, assumably because she thought I was joking and when I said I wasn't kidding, she started begging me. I told her no again and stood firm on the fact that I am drinking tonight. I'm not doing anything else.

She says she isn't mad at me for saying no but is mad at the fact that I chose drinking over helping out my best friend and says that it makes her feel less important to me. I don't know how to go about this because I'm a fucking adult and if I want to drink, I'm gonna drink. The plan was for Friday. Like yeah, I get that she has kids who don't want to eat what's in the house but I also don't see that as my problem either. How do I go about this without showing her how pissed I am (because I'm mostly pissed about work, not her)?

[God_of_Thunder]

While I don't like drinking, or even alcohol in general; I don't think you're in the wrong, at all.

Substitute alcohol for literally any other activity; going out with friends, a date, feeding the homeless, whatever, and the situation remains the same: you already had plans.

She's upset because it's "just" drinking, but the fact of the matter is that she is reliant upon you, and you already agreed to take her on Friday. Now she calls you up, unexpectedly, and expects you to change your plans, simply because she wants you to? Yeah, no.

It doesn't matter what activity you had planned, she has no right to get upset about the fact that you had something else to do, and she can wait until the day that you set aside to help her. If she doesn't like that arrangement, then she can find someone else to take her on Friday.

She's using you, and taking advantage of you. If anyone has the right to be upset, it's you. Quite frankly, the fact that she's upset is more than a little arrogant, when she's relying on your generosity, in the first place. She's putting her desires above yours, and she can fuck right off with that shit.

[joeldalton]

What the fuck? She's not a friend, she's a user. Tell he she needs to get her shit together and start acting like an adult.

[Anonymous]

sorry but this bitch needs to get her license, i know she's scared but... either starve your kids or suck it up for half an hour to the store. i bet she doesn't even say thank you when you drop her off. i've had a friend like that. had to go out of my way to bring her to work, she gets out of the car and just closes the door. no thank you or anything. it was very apparent to me that she thinks she's the center of the universe and was using me just because i have a car. stop making yourself be a doormat, this is not your problem.

[LazerBean]

No, a grown ass woman with kids needs to get her own shit together and be able to take care of things without having to depend on other people for basic things like getting around. I wouldn't even associate with a loser like that.

[MiamiMadness]

You don’t need friends like that, drop her like a hot pot