How should I respond if the ghoster comes back and invites me?

[Anonymous]

Ghoster cameback after 3 weeks, invited me to do something together and said they missed me? I doubt it's true.

What should I do?

[Anonymous]

Do you know the reason they ghosted you? I went out with a woman that I thought ghosted me after a couple dates, but I was actually getting a little too close too quick and she was only briefly backing off. By the time she texted me back I was already seeing someone else and she was really confused by that

[Asker]

No, the ghoster never truly explained. But they actually ghosted me twice. The first time, it took them 3 weeks to reply. After that, we exchanged a few messages (regarding what happened to them, etc) and they left me on read a few times. But they never really got into any details. So yeah, I once left them on delivered for 5 days, and they double texted me on day 4 (they wanted to know if I was okay). And once I replied, it took them 4 hours to reply to me. And after that, we were on "good terms". So I stopped texting them to see if they would reach out, but they didn't.

So 2 weeks later, I reached out and invited them to do an activity with me. They left me on read/ghosted me for 3 weeks. And yeah, here I am. I haven't replied yet. It's been 2 days, and I haven't opened the message yet. I'm thinking of ghosting them back. I feel like they're just trying to see if they still have "control" over me by saying what I wanna hear ("I miss you", "Do you want to do X thing with me today?", etc).

[Asker]

Oh and when they finally replied (a couple days ago), they tried to make me believe that they "didn't know that I had written to them"... which is false, considering the fact that they actually left me on read a few weeks ago. And if they really did miss me, they would have probably reached out earlier than that.

[Opinion Owner]

She's probably seeing other people or super busy with something else. You definitely dont seem like a priority to her

[Asker]

Well I obviously know that, I was left on read for 3 weeks. But it was just a friend, not a romantic interest. So I don't really care whether they're seeing someone else or not. I'm kinda starting to think that the person is a narc.

[Opinion Owner]

THAT makes 10000% more sense. I was under the impression you went on a date with this person at some point

[Opinion Owner]

You're her friend. Why do you care about text frequency?

[Asker]

No, what bothers me is the ghosting. Just because it's a friend doesn't mean that ghosting is okay. Especially not for 3 weeks. I could understand not getting a response for a few days... but 3 weeks? That's way too long.

[Asker]

And now, the fact that they act like they "didn't see the message" while they actually left me on read 3 weeks ago is another thing that truly bothers me. Like, what's the point of lying about it if we can see the read receipt?

[Opinion Owner]

Oof. Get a girlfriend and crawl out her ass