My niece is too sexual for her age?

[Anonymous]

Granted yes she has been messed with by her step dad which is why my sister and her two kids moved in with me. To escape that situation and so her ex husband doesn’t know where she is.

So, my niece did something really inappropriate with her privates (she’s 6) with my daughter watching (4!!!) and I am not okay with that shit. My sister denies it even happened but I know wtf it was when I saw it. Now my sister is upset with me. I pay all of the bills EVERYTHING for my sister and her two kids plus my daughter and myself. She does help me with my daughter by taking her to school, picking her up, etc. because I work 12hr days 5-6 days a week.

What do I even do about this situation? The goal when she moved in was for her to get some kind of job going for herself and start becoming a contributing member of society (she’s about to be 30) but it’s been almost a year and there hasn’t been any movement. I don’t want to ruin my relationship with my sister but something has to give and I have already had several talks about her daughters influence on my daughter as well as needing her help with bills and other expenses that I single-handedly pay myself while only making $18 an hour. Thoughts?

[mamuma02]

If you are never home, why do you complain that she helps out? Do you have a Nancy? Its better than nothing.

Not everybody are Lucky to finding Jobs fast. And with what she ve bern through, it needs a lot of time to calm your heart and start to work and stop worrying for it to repeat.

Yes she needs to find a job so that she can also contribute/support, so that you won't be the only one bringing money on the table

And about the kid that was doing sexual stuff to herself, you don't even know why that happened, but instead you started to get angry at your sister and her kid. How do you know if its her or your daughter who influenced bad stuff to the other. Kids are like spoonge sucking in water, they suck in everything they see and try it out of curiousity. Why not investigate your niece and daughter gentle together with your sister to find out why your niece was behaving sexually?

Maybe its from online
Maybe something they saw a neighboors do?
Maybe they saw that at a friends house?
Or maybe she was curious about why she have a pussy and whyb pee comes out there so she touched herself.
Maybe something happened at school.
Or maybe your niece's father was a pedophile?


So you never know. Don't use anger as the first option. We get that you are stressed and have a lot on your plate, but try to think rational.

[Asker]

She is hyper sexual because her step dad molested her … my sister and her kids are considered at risk for harm being done to them by the stepdad/husband but there’s been no tangible proof. My daughter was not molested and has never been around that because I used to no have to work so much and was able to be home more with my daughter.

[mamuma02]

So you know the reason, but still get angry? How would ypu feel if it was your kid that was molested?

Itd not ro late to teach the girl better behaviours. You should sit down with your sister and talk about how to teach your niece that what she is doing is wrong. If you two adult can't do that, then find a terapeut for children. Its just like teaching kid about not accepting candy from strangers or not getting in a stranger's car. But teaching about sexual stuff being bad, is not gonna be so easy.

Or else she might do sexual stuff to herself at the kindergathen, swimming place, at friends house... and so on

Its better to teach behavious while the girl is still young and not to late.

Its abvious that the little girl don't even understand what she is doing.

[Cuminginside]

I should give you my psychology degree.

[mamuma02]

Thanks for superb opinion 🥰🥰

[Anonymous]

Probably going to need to involve social services or kick them both out. If the step father inferred with the girl she will need follow up help from councillors etc

[NewYorkCity]

1. I will give you my personal opinion from a male perspective. When I touched myself for the very first time, if you understand what I'm saying here, that was It, there was no going back. I don't know how old is your daughter, but If she experiences that feeling, again, I'm trying to be clean here, it Will open a door, that will lead to other things that I assume are way too early for her to know or experience. Your family comes FIRST. If you believe that your sister's kids are corrupting your kids, it is time for you to be a MOTHER first and Sister second. Kids are difficult, believe me I know, but having kids who know ""things"" way before their time is wrong.

2. It is time for you to put your foot down, you are in a sinking ship right now and you are carrying way too many people on your back, God forbid something is going to happen to you, sickness, injury etc... all the people who are on your back will go down with you Hard. You cannot be selfless person toward other people, especially your family when you have nothing to give. It is time for you to become selfish, only your temporary selfishness would be able to solve your current problem. On your temporary selfishness would be able to push or even kick your sister to get a job ASAP.

[Anonymous]

The truth is that your daughter most likely already has a phone or will have one soon where she will be exposed to sexual stuff.
Your sister is doing a huge favor by being the bus driver because that is a huge hassle to pick up kids or drop them off school. You have to wait in line and everyone for them. It’s a big help. Especially for you working all the time. That will get tiring.

[Asker]

My daughter has a tablet made for just kids. Parental controls on everything. I’m not saying my daughter hasn’t been exposed to stuff like that, I’m saying I don’t appreciate it happening in my house because of what my niece has gone through.

My sister walks 4 mins to the school and drops her off and picks her up… seeing as her kids are going to the same school she would be doing that anyways…

[Asker]

I am also in school full time trying to become a nurse. I work full time and I’m never home. That would be alleviated and I could better keep an eye on my kid and hers even if she had a job and everything didn’t fall on just my shoulders.

[misogynistic_pig]

No, she's just an average American girl.