Do I have a reason to be annoyed?

[Anonymous]

I have some aunts visiting us at my moms house because my dad passed away couple weeks ago. Its so annoying because I just want to be in my room alone im depressed dont wanna be talking or around them dont have energy. They keep wanting to go to places and I have to go or else they are gonna be disappointed that my mom can't go since we need 2 cars. They also keep saying how skinny I am which is fuckin annoying since I been going to the gym and building some muscle. Its an everyday comment about my body like 5x a day. Then if im serious they ask why am I serious like hmm my dad just passed. Also im driving my car and they say "you look too fragile to drive this car haha". I feel its more put downs if anything and I been more serious each day

[CupcakeTheDestroyer]

Yeah, those are valid reasons to be annoyed. I know confronting problematic family members is never fun so I would take to pointedly ignoring them. I imagine they're making these comments just because they've got some internalized misogyny and don't enjoy seeing a younger, thinner, presumably prettier woman to be constantly compared to in public. Next time, why not just offer to drive them and then "park the car" but never actually go with them anywhere? And if they call, just tell them you're still looking for a space and just go get some fast food or something and stay in the privacy of your car.

[Asker]

I took them to sf because my mom kept bothering me too after I told her im depressed but they just ignore how I feel. After I took them they constantly wanted to take photos. I kept saying no I do not want to be in the photo and they kept bugging saying get in the photo dont be so serious. I was so annoyed like why do I want to be in a photo feeling this way. I kept saying no until they said take the photo then

[Asker]

It bothered me so much how they said I was being grumpy like wow my dad passed away I dont feel like smiling. I can't wait for them to leave. Been so exhausted and they are making me feel worse

[CupcakeTheDestroyer]

Honestly, why not just talk with your mom in private? Tell her how awful you feel, and you know she's trying to make you feel better but the entire thing is just irritating and you're coming to resent her and the rest of your family for continuing to force you to do what they want? Grief hits us all differently, and while your mother may be happy to go out and find that joy with her family, you clearly want time alone and if you're not allowed to ask for it from those aunts, you can at least let your mother try to advocate for you. I'm sure if she sees how upset this is making you, in private, she'll try to consider your feelings more.

[Asker]

I talked to my mom yesterday about feeling extremely overwhelmed. I told her its not fair I have to babysit my 3 year old autistic nephew every weekend and dont have freedom to even lay down to rest. I even cried and told her im tired of my life and she cried too and said she understands me but that I still have to watch him. I told her its not fair since I dont even want kids since I dont have patience let alone with this situation

[Asker]

I just feel everything is going wrong for me and I just can't no more. I slept all day today to just let the day go faster and my family was wondering if im mad at them but they just can't understand I want time alone

[Guy13]

No. It is a death. Give people slack.

[Asker]

That I give them less slack or them to me?

[Guy13]

Everyone needs to chill the F- out. It’s sad and people street right during death but please everyone