My mom's a bad hoarder and I can't deal emotionally with that to the point that I developed disorders. I have to stay away from my house and I try to do that but I have to come back from my outings eventually right? I live here after all. But every time I come back, I can't stay strong for more then a week. I eat my emotions so badly and I pick on my skin uncontrollably.. It's really really bad. I used to be stronger but with time my level of strength and patience has been weakening. After this happens I go through a few phases: pain and fear caused by what I did and finally getting over it. So I work out again to lose those kilograms that I gained and I try to heal my scars. Then I'm finally "ready" to leave my house ( I'm finally not embarrassed anymore of how I look) and try to organize something for myself to not be here. But after the time of being away, I need to come back home and I manage to control my urge to hurt my skin and to stress eat for like 3 days to 1 week but after that I break down and do it again. It's a vicious cycle, I've dealed with this repetitive situation for like 6 years becoming weaker and weaker and my scars started to be harder to heal.
How do I get out of my house?
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Time to move out. Set a goal, start socking away cash, look for a roommate if you can’t afford to live on your own. I know it’s not a quick fix, but that’s your only way out. I’d also say to consider therapy if you haven’t already. Help yourself where you can.
Now I have a difficulty in getting out of bed, stuffing myself with food and skin picking. I 'm scared that if I decide to try again, to pull myself together, the situation will reoccur 🥺. I feel embarrassed and hurt to get out of my house now. What do I do?
Have you gone to a doctor? That sounds serious…
It is. Yeah, I've been seeing a psychologist for like 2 years on and off. I just need to move out. I'm a normal and happy person outside my house
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