Would it "ruin Christmas" if someone got your child a gift not typical of their gender?

[IceCreamSandwich]

I saw a post somewhere where a mom was complaining about a relative getting her son a makeup kit—which he had specifically asked for—because she thought it would ruin the whole day with extended family when he unwrapped it.

It made me think because something similar happened in our family once, when one of my girl cousins picked a set of legos during a gift-exchange game. Her mom tried to make her trade it with me because I was the only young boy there and I'd ended up with something boring like a candle or a blanket, but she didn't want to, so I pretended to really like what I'd got so she couldn't trade with me.

It was fine when she picked the legos. A couple of people made jokes, but nobody was upset about it, they just thought it was funny. It was only when her mom started acting like she'd done something wrong that things got awkward. I don't think anyone would have been uncomfortable if she had just let her daughter keep it and not made a big deal about it.

[NamerOfStars]

Legos ARE gender-neutral- so I'd say, anyway.

But if it's something that the kid wanted and asked for, then no, I don't see how that'd be a problem. Sometimes people have interests atypical for their gender; that doesn't make it "bad" or "wrong", just odd. We're all products of a joint effort between a man and a woman, and we all some combination of masculine and feminine traits.

[exitseven]

There is sort of a big difference between a girl getting a Lego set and a boy getting a makeup kit. I might think it was inappropriate as well.

[Shamalien]

Agreed. Like if he asked for a dress I wouldn’t get him that so why a makeup kit? Parents need to look out for their kids

[IceCreamSandwich]

What difference? One is a girl getting a boy gift, and one is a boy getting a girl gift.

[exitseven]

Thanks for the MHO😎

[Ez-Bri-Z_v2]

Nah. My kids will play with just about everything especially my daughter. If anything it might cause jealousy that one got something and not the other. I wouldn't care what extended family said about it either.

[Astarlessnightsky]

LOL, no.

As long as kids are happy its fine.

[coachTanthony]

Yeah no make up kits for the boys please.

[IceCreamSandwich]

So you think both cases were bad, or just the one with the boy?

[coachTanthony]

I’m going with just the boy

[IceCreamSandwich]

Why? That doesn't make sense. They're the same.

[coachTanthony]

We need more female engineers

[IceCreamSandwich]

Yes, but what does that have to do with kids Christmas gifts?

[coachTanthony]

I’m lost what’s the specific question?

[IceCreamSandwich]

Why do you think a boy getting a girl gift is not okay, but a girl getting a boy gift is okay?

[coachTanthony]

I think both are wrong and shouldn't happen. I just wouldn't be too worried about a girl playing with a tonka toy then a boy playing with a barbie. Kids would make fun of the boy and maybe even harass him where girls have always been tomboys.

[IceCreamSandwich]

Oh okay, you don't think the boys case is worse, you just think other people will act worse toward him, so because of those people he shouldn't be allowed that gift.

[coachTanthony]

I would like my children to get presents based off their gender. Period.

[IceCreamSandwich]

I understand. I hope your kids feel the same and appreciate how you choose to raise them.

[coachTanthony]

It doesn't matter how they feel. That's the problem, parents are allowing any old thought in kids mind to be taken seriously.

[IceCreamSandwich]

I know it doesn't matter to your decision how they feel, but it does matter to them. I wasn't trying to be mean or say you would want your kids to be miserable. Some kids are happy with parents like that, and some aren't. I hope yours are happy, that's all.

[Anonymous]

Kinda shitty

[IceCreamSandwich]

What is?

[Opinion Owner]

Better no gift than an insult

[IceCreamSandwich]

The kids wanted those gifts. The boy specifically requested it, and my cousin specifically chose it. How would it be insulting to give a child a gift they want?

[Opinion Owner]

Then why ask the question?

[IceCreamSandwich]

I want to know why you think it's shitty and an insult. I don't understand that perspective.