Why do people think you’re selfish if you don’t want kids? Shouldn't it be selfish to have children when you don’t want any?

[Anonymous]

[Vevv123]

People are ignorant and judgmental for the wrong reasons. So ignorant that they forget to realize that a child needs many things. It is selfish to bring a child to this world and not be ready emotionally, financially, or juts simply not be ready. It only shows they are already not thinking of those children. Children are humans that have basic needs and if you don’t want them or aren’t ready that’s a perfect reason, you are doing a good job in recognizing that, while other people just carelessly have them.

[DishLady]

In toIt’s selfish to have kids if you’re either not ready to raise them or not ready to care for them properly.


Last week was with some kid who talked about having several children right after college rather than mapping out his career. I looked at him and counseled him on how illogical it was for him to envision petri dish babies before having a career path or partner or anything.

[Cutegirl06]

You're absolutely right! I think if you don't want kids and you have them You're not going to resent the child and subconsciously you won't give the child all the love they deserve. If you don't want children then that's your choice! People always think they have answers to other people's lives. You do you and forget what others say. Remember what others say about you is says more about them than it does you 💯

[Lliam]

You could say that people who want kids are selfish because they want them for their own personal gratification.

There is nothing wrong with not wanting children. There are numerous rational reasons why a person would not want to be a parent. They may simply feel like they aren't cut out for it. They might be concerned that they couldn't adequately provide for children with the expense of medical, sports and activities, school and college. They might be afraid of the worry of disease, injury, disappointment, mental illness, drug use, or death. And then there is the state of the country and world these days. I honestly feel sorry for kids these days.

I, myself, never had any interest in having kids. I had a great life not being tied down.
I got married when I was 42. My wife is 2.5 years younger. We've been married now for almost 29 years and are very happy. We've talked it over and are glad we don't have the burden of children.

The bottom line is, you don't owe anybody anything.

[kmg9150]

Ahhh. And imagine what life would have been like if your parents felt the same…. Too have had a burden like yourself and if you have any siblings them as well.

It is natures plan reproduce. Others wise we would not have survived as a species. Each couple would need to produce at least a minimum of 3 children for so as the for the population to increase unless their 1 child would produce 4. And such…. Yes some people are selfish when it comes to what they seek out of their children but the parenting as a whole is more so a selfless implementation in the grand scheme of existence..

[Lliam]

@kmg9150. Fine. Have all the kids you want. But what other people want to do with their lives is none of your business.
On top of that, some people do a pretty shitty job of raising kids.

[Chazmatazz269]

Good parents put their children’s needs, and even sometimes their whims, ahead of their own. So the assumption is that if you don’t want to have kids, you must not be ready to put someone else’s needs above your own.
It used to be the same for marriage. We have unfortunately become so accustomed to obscenely selfish relationships and marriages, that is no longer the case. Particularly where women are concerned. Women who don’t want to marry are now “independent” and “empowered”. Meanwhile men who don’t want to marry are still referred to with disdain. Whether they are considered “selfish” or “afraid of commitment”, or some other pejorative, it’s not widely perceived as a good thing when men avoid relationships and marriage.

[kmg9150]

They say its selfish because we as humans would not have survived if not for our numbers. To have kids is what nature intended. Without children there can be no future for the continuation of the our species…. So if you are not doing such then you are being selfish about our survival as a species.


Think of this for a second, if you think its people shouldn't have children because of its burden, do you agree that you shouldn't have been born then?


Its sad to how many people look down and behave negatively towards children simply because they are children, behave as such and over all just want some love and attention. I do feel that any adult that despises children in such ways, shouldn't be allowed to be an adult.

[HawkPerception]

You will only find out the joy that comes with having kids when you have them. You'll also likely regret not having a family of your own one day.

But sure, convince yourself it's not selfish to use all your money on yourself and not have to be responsible for kids.

Ask yourself, what are you sacrificing yourself when you choose to not have kids? The only thing you can say is having a family of your own.

You do your thing though. Statistics actually say the majority of women do not regret not having children later in life. Most child free women are content with their decision. There is only a minority of women that regret not having kids of their own.

I'd argue the ones that are content not having kids are the selfish ones though. Regardless I hope you end up happy with whatever decision you make, whatever my opinion of your selfishness may be.

[ohsheeT]

Very very true. Is very sad when people bring kids in to the world. When they really didn't want them. But had them to please there partner or parents..


For the person that is being honest doesn't want its great that they are being honest

I could say well your missing out on one of the best things in this world.

But in today's times I shake there hand and say its all good. Because I don't know if I would want to raise a child in today's world. It's so very correct. As a country we do not know where we're headed. And that's the last things that you would want to do is bring the child into the world in these days and times because it's a twenty four hour a day job even after thirteen years old if you want them to be good people

[AviatorTom]

It's not selfish if both you and your partner don't want kids, but if your partner does and you don't, that would be selfish on your part. Some sort of compromise between you and your partner is warranted.

[Stevepro68]

Not everyone should have children. There are over 9 billion people in the world it's not selfish it's smart.

[Luopio27]

I agree with you!
No one should be peer pressured into parenthood or looked down upon for not wanting the same life!


I dont want kids and ain't gona become a parent for someone elses opinion over everyone should have kids!

[SotiCoto]

They don't "think" that. They opine that because they don't think. They're retards. They don't understand that children are just extensions of the self, and that having children is supremely self-centred.

[exitseven]

Kids are not for everyone. They are a huge responsibility. A lot of people are just not up to it and it is not fair to the kids that they have dick heads as parents.

[Berethor]

Your parents put so much effert into you, while you want to end their bloodline, it selfish.

[Asker]

You’re selfish to have children when you don’t want them because you don’t have the desire to have them.

[Berethor]

It selfless to care about the family future more than about your selfish hedonist lifestyle.

[Asker]

You prefer for a woman to be a shitty parent than to not have any kids at all.

[Berethor]

Maybe, at least the shitty parent is trying, the childless is can be seen as totally useless.

[Asker]

You’re an idiot there are parents who are parents who shouldn’t be parents because they don’t give their children the proper care and that’s how children end up in foster care or adopted because their parents didn’t really cared about them to begin with.

[kmg9150]

@asker their are plenty of children whos parents wanted to have children, did and are still ishy parents. Just because someone didn't want kids doesn't mean they will be a ishy parent. I didn't see myself having a kid but took on one as my own when I started dating his mother when he was 1. Mother left me after 11 years and kept playing the you can't see him game everytime she finds a new D to manipulate. Was I the best dad, thats opinionated… I had my issues, I struggled with my own issues like drugs and his mothers manipulation. Never did I beat him, I always worked 50+ hours to support all of us, always tried to make time for him when I he asked for it. His mom sorta had this thing about keeping him from actually having friends, like ones he could hang out with during the week after school and what not, so often I found myself in that best friend role as well, playing video games that I wasn't into and such…. Nobody knows what type of parent they will be until they are one. The one thing we know is that the future is the children…

[InknKink]

I've been called selfish for that exact reason on multiple occasions.

Truth is, I am a selfish person.

[SoJust]

People always criticize you. They don't care about who you are. People will always say something. Their life's purpose is always talking. Don't take people seriously and shape your life accordingly.

[Jackblue]

I believe that everyone has to make their own decisions on having kids overall, however abortion is not acceptable, get it transferred when it is still an embryo or take it to an orphanage after it is born.

[Zylos]

The people I have heard that from were either boomers (who are also wrecking the planet) or religious fanatics (AKA Americans).

[dragoblack]

To say "you are selfish for not wanting kids" shows the person is pro-birth, who is a group of people groomed into thinking that way, by exploitive corporations who treat people like livestock for profit.

[glennos89]

Definitly not selfish! If you don't want kids then you probably shouldn't get children so it's definitely not selfish

[fantasticass]

I never had children. Best decision I made. Don't have kid's. Have a life ❤️

[fonduegirl]

People are obsessed with the gene game, ma'am. It's not your fault

[genericname85]

of course it's selfish to have children. but the logic is: if nobody has children, then society has no future.

[Iron_Man]

but what about your husband if he wants them

[Anonymous]

Not wanting kids is not selfish in and of itself, but it's an indication of a selfish nature. That's what they mean.

It's not wrong to not want kids, but it is an indicator of someone's personality.

[seeyounexttuesday]

People who don't want kids are brainwashed by a narcissistic, nihilistic society to believe that way.

[Staximus]

Because they are dumb. The world doesn't need any more people

[MrOracle]

You are clueless. You might want to look into the population collapse that is underway.

I hope you aren't planning to retire, and hopefully you don't need long term care, because there is going to be labor shortages worldwide. Gen Alpha is tiny, which means the labor force and the tax base will be tiny. If you think that won't matter, you are going to learn a very painful truth in 20 years.

[Staximus]

@MrOracle your myopic outlook of the future is not taking the long term survival of the human race and the planet into account. Some sacrifices are going to have to be made. The last thing this planet needs is more pollution generating resource vacuums. You should change your name to Mr Dumbass.

[MrOracle]

We'll see how well you maintain your convictions when they won't even be able to keep the power on and when it takes you 6 weeks to get someone to look at your car when it breaks. I don't think you quite understand what COLLAPSE means.

[Staximus]

@MrOracle I can make my own power and fix everything on my car, smart guy

[Staximus]

@MrOracle I'm not taking any advice from a guy who doesn't even know the proper way to hold a Glock. You know approximately jack about shit.

[MrOracle]

Do you know the fastest way to prove to everyone that your position is wrong and you know you can't defend it? It's to attack your opponent personally, instead of attacking his position. Do you think people don't see your ad hominem attacks as you being unable to defend your ideas?

If you aren't embarrassed, you should be. I'm embarrassed for you.

[Staximus]

@MrOracle you're the one who started talking shit first, you puffed up pompous toad. You act like you know everything about everything. Then make asinine assumptions about people you know nothing about and make yourself look like an idiot. Learn how to hold a Glock, smart guy.

[MrOracle]

More ad hominem attacks. I guess I shouldn't have expected anything else.

[Staximus]

@MrOracle keep deflecting, shit bird

[Staximus]

@MrOracle you're not even going to live long enough to see the real effects of population decline and neither am I. Your inability to see the long term benefits of population decline for the human race and planet means you are just another idiot talking out of your ass as usual. Now fuck off and get off my post, shit bird.

[Staximus]

@MrOracle I'm not a helpless bitch boy who needs everybody to do everything for me like you. Fuck the infrastructure. The only thing I can't do for myself is surgery. Oh well.

[MrOracle]

You think you don't depend on electricity, oil refining, water purification and distribution, farming, food processing, and distribution, just to name a few. I'm not buying it.

[Staximus]

@MrOracle Do you think that half the world's population is going to just magically disappear all of a sudden? Time to tune back into reality and stop buying into the doomsday hype.

[MrOracle]

It's not going to happen overnight, but over a 20-30 year period of time. But you are greatly underestimating the impact that's going to have on you, and any children you might have.

Japan, which was expected to be one of the top economies in the world in the 80s, has been in an economic stagnation for 40 years now. The country is full of abandoned houses because there is no one to live in them. Their population has fallen 20% since the 80s and the decline is accelerating. Their birthrate was the first to start falling in the 90s

South Korea's birthrate has dropped much faster, but for a shorter amount of time. They are just starting to feel the first negative effects, but they are on track for their population to drop 45% over the next 20 years. The birthrate there is barely 1, with 2.1 being the minimum to maintain the population.

[Staximus]

@MrOracle Japan is still severely overpopulated. Sacrifices have to be made, fuck the economy

[DCVsMarvel2]

They think that because you're a woman, that's all you're worth

[CB-Raido-Time]

If you have any you don't want I would be happy to take them off your hands.

[CB-Raido-Time]

I can not believe people don't want children that even feels offensive to me.

[wkhan_87]

People are just selfish to give opinion
Just do what you want..

[itsannalee]

Some people are just dumb

[WhitneySnow]

That’s absolutely your choice

[slatyb]

Somebody has to pay for their Social Security.

[Wise4myage]

Yeah, that's rude in my opinion.

[TonyMetal___86]

It's a personal choice between the couple

[Myra01]

This is your prefer, dont mind them

[MasterKS]

@Myra01 I second.

[Anonymous]

I agree with you on this.

[MsKoffee]

Cause they want your missory.

[MasterKS]

No, its actually being practical.